I have taken on a new personal project. I'm putting together a collection of the silliest, most offensive, and embarrassing quotes from leaders and top authorities from TSCC. Things like the Journal of Discourses (direct quotes from prophets), conference talks, scriptures, and the lds.org essays. I'd prefer to stay away from apologetics other than lds.org, as TSCC could easily distance themselves from the vastly differing "not officially supported" theories.

I've got stuff like Martin Harris apparently visiting the moon (followed up by Joseph F Smith stating that man will never visit the moon or space, ever) and that one time SWK ran into Bigfoot/Cain for a casual chat. I'm most interested in this flat-out weird stuff, but also things like Joseph Smith's (many, many) false prophecies and declarations of war against Missouri/the Federal Government/all other churches.

I plan on putting them together in a small blog, posting one or two a day with sources. I think it'll be interesting to see what kind of strange things ooze out of the woodwork, and hopefully people will get a good chuckle out of it. If you guys have any favorite quotes, I'd love to get a few suggestions as well.

'satan rules the waters' as declared by Horny joe, after he fell out of a canoe

There's so much to choose from, this could be a very long-term project. This will give you a start.

http://exmormon.org/phorum/read.php?2,1739452

http://exmormon.org/phorum/read.php?2,1324407

Also go to MormonThink. They've got a lot of good quotes on many subjects.

One of my favorites:

"I think no more of taking another wife than I do of buying a cow." - Apostle Heber C. Kimball

Oh, how romantic! And just in time for Valentine's Day! I might post a few on the 14, like how Brigham would impale any of his wives and monogamy is a curse on humanity. A love bomb, if you will.

I don't have a quote at hand, but I always found the 'three Nephites' going around the world so strange.

My wife has supposedly educated cousins in W. Virginia who don't think NASA ever put a man on the moon and that all the rocket launches are done using CGI....the earth is 6000 years old 'cause their hellfire and brimstone evangelical preacher told them so.
Sweet hillbilly folk...but dumb.

RB

It's not a quote, but there was a song that the polygamy mormons sang about the women helping their husbands get another wife.

The lyrics are shocking.


https://books.google.com/books?id=YJUl0TzsKkIC&pg=PA132&dq=now+sisters+list+to+what+I+say+with+trial+this+world+is+rife+help+husband+get+a+wife&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjPw8TziPTKAhVQz2MKHcRcB18Q6AEIHTAA#v=onepage&q=now%20sisters%20list%20to%20what%20I%20say%20with%20trial%20this%20world%20is%20rife%20help%20husband%20get%20a%20wife&f=false



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/13/2016 01:07AM by madalice.