So I've been on face book three months now. My sister, who is the most TBM of all my siblings, accepts my friendship. But, she never posts and not once has she left so much as a "like" on my page. Family photos, life events, etc... All I get from her is silence. I had no idea she was paying any attention to me.

But I do notice that she gets on about once a week and uniformly "likes" only those posts that are official LDS propaganda.

Any way, I have been so careful to remain completely uncontroversial on Facebook because I do not want to alienate anyone. And I have been able to do that for a solid three months. But then, another LDS relative posts about her displeasure about a building at WSU being named after B. K. Packer. Finally, I decide I can loosen up a little and chime in with my opinion.

What do you know, my tbm sister comes out of the woodwork and asks for an explanation. I didn't even know she was there. I didn't know she cared. How am I suppose to know whose level of sensitivity I have to tip toe around if they never even leave a signature on my page?

You're not responsible for the feelings of others on FB. If your sister doesn't like what you post, she can unfriend, block or unsubscribe to your posts.

You also don't owe her an explanation for your feelings on an issue. It's one thing if you want to expand on the reasons you posted what you did but it's not an obligation.

Just asking, because it usually seems that the exmos are doing the tiptoeing and the TBMs feel entitled to talk about their religion constantly.

I think the grey area is that Mormons are saying positive things about their religion, and it IS rather uncool to discredit or bash on someone's religion-on facebook, at least. If you were to say something cool about Buddhism, or some other religion, that would be fine.

I think it's a delicate balance.

You have a right to post things about the positive experiences you have because of leaving the church, just like Mormons talk about their positive experiences. Be honest.

In my case, I'm not noticeably happier than I was in TSCC, so I avoid speaking about happiness. I instead say that I now feel more comfortable leading life by my own rules.

Sometimes (if you're cryptic enough, saying general phrases like, "live life by your own rules" or "assume nothing, always look for the truth") Mormons will actually LIKE your anti-Mormon posts because of how inspirational they are, because they didn't realize that the posts are about being an ex-mo!!! Eventually, you will discover that many Mormons ALREADY agree with your views, but they just can't find the courage to allow themselves to fully comprehend the demons that hold them within TSCC.

I strongly advise you to not post negative things about the church. It will only cause harm to your relationships, and thus lessens the possibility of your sister accepting the ACTUAL truth about TSCC.

I would just respond that you are surprised that she is reading your posts because that's the first response or like you've gotten from her, and you've been posting a lot of family things, etc. I would not respond to her demand for an explanation.

You are going to have to come to a decision about how controversial (or not) you want to be on FB.