What age group do you think is getting out of the church the fastest? I know there can be a gap between when a person finds out the truth about the church and when they no longer considered themselves LDS. Also, some inactives who don't formerly resign don't feel any more Mormon than those who do. So how old were you when you no longer considered yourself a Mormon? I was 41.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 04/12/2013 11:16AM by CA girl.

Kind of in reply to Cali Sally (did I get that right--can't see it right now). I went inactive at 38 because my gay husband was cheating and ex. sec. The bishop told me he would be one of the next bishops. My response was to go inactive as I didn't think they'd call him as a bishop with an inactive wife. BUT I had started questioning probably about age 20--first from dating nonmormons--and more and more questions piled up. My gay husband was a big QUESTION when we confronted the leaders for answers while we were dating and they had none. I realize now we married partially to get the leaders out of our lives so we could figure this out. We read dialog and Sunstone--followed Steve Benson and the September 6 stories. It was almost a no brainer when we went inactive.

Even after I went inactive, I still thought I would go back someday--but give yourself enough time to clear your mind and it all becomes clear. I realized I no longer believed when I was about 47. I resigned at age 53.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 04/12/2013 11:33AM by cl2.

Ditto. I think it's more about when you stop being influenced by peer and family pressure. Many of us jump the bandwagon when we hit middle age. But I'm seeing a lot of young posters here who just aren't influenced so much by peer pressure in their wards and are close enough to college and leaving home that they cannot wait to leave the Morg.

Once you reach what I call "the age of reason" it's more about doing what's right for you and not about pleasing everyone else. It's not so much selfishness as reasonableness or becoming a rational thinker.

Me too. 41. I'd been on that very uncomfortable fence for about 15 years.

But I can remember a time when the phone receiver was attached to the wall by a curly cord, you had to get up and cross the room to change the radio or television station, and people had typewriters (some of them even electric!), not computers.

I think the church is going to have a very difficult time indeed holding onto the Internet generation.

I hope it's the younger generation who will leave the fastest.

But I was about 45 when I went inactive and 50 when I resigned.

Man, it's shocking to me to even type that I'm 50-something. When did that happen? LOL

48 for me when I stopped going. I had progressively become more inactive over the few years prior.

Just this year at 27. I know I heavily questioned the church before now for about 4-5 years but I kept going and trying to believe for one reason or another.

I think I realized yesterday that I no longer consider myself a Mormon. I'm 30, but I haven't believed for a year or so, and I doubted on and off for about a decade.

inactive at 32, out at 33

Jackmo by 15, out at 18, but didn't know things like real history or that I could resign until 28. They're good at keeping us insecure and in the dark. Hooray for RfM!

56

I was an attending non-believer for quite a while but didn't actually do something about it until last year, I was 42.

Inactive the minute I left for college. Reactive at 24. Inactive and non-believing at 27. Found RFM at 48, and now thinking about officially resigning at 49.

Eighteen when I stopped attending. I pretty much stopped believing at that age, but didn't resigning until I was in my 50s

Left at age 19.

Resigned at age 36.

I'm surprised. The majority, so far, are middle-aged.

I feel like a good 30-50% of youth in my ward pretty much dropped off the radar after high school. I think a few got guilted back, but just by Facebook, the majority of us are out.

I went inactive around 19 and resigned at 24.

33 for me, last summer. I was out within 2 weeks when i found out

I stopped going about 30, was on the fence by 32 stopped believing all together about 34.

As soon as I found the BOA & BOM problems never went back at 33. Resigned a couple of weeks ago at age 34.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/12/2013 11:45AM by notanymore.

41 1/2 when I realized and accepted it was all bullshit.

42 when I went totally inactive and stopped trying to attend "for the family" because I realized it was like a cancer that was killing me on the inside.

I don't know if the 18 to 30 crowd are leaving the fastest, but they are not cowed by authority, they say what they think, and they are four square for marriage equality, among other issues that give BKKKP heartburn.

In short, they are Boyd's worst nightmare. If they aren't leaving the fastest yet, they will be soon, unless LDS Inc changes a lot, and fast.

Changing a lot, and fast, is not LDS Inc's strong suit.

IMHO, the Millennials are the coming tidal wave. COB, be very afraid.

I was 42 when I stopped believing. Went inactive two weeks later and resigned within a few months.

Most of my siblings went inactive either during high school or immediately thereafter. One sibling was exed in his mid-30s; I think he still believes.

Perhaps it would be more accurate to also list what Generation we are categorized under, as we may have multiple folks here who left in their 30s, but each may have been 30-something in a different generation.

I'm technically a Gen X'er.

60. I decided to finally give up on it after a lifetime of WTF moments....

I think the most common age to go inactive is about 18, when they leave home from their parents, and can choose for themselves whether to go to church or not.

I think the 40/50 somethings leave because they get to the point in their lives where they can stop and think about what they've accomplished and they realize that there is something wrong with the church - it doesn't deliver as promised. They also may have gotten to the point in their lives where they have time to research.

The younger ones leave because they are more plugged in/informed and they come across the information easily. They also have been raised to expect more than just narrow church goals and are more open-minded due to being more plugged in. Not to say people my age aren't open-minded but honestly, you kiddies were exposed to more of the world than I was at your age. It was easier to keep kids sheltered before the internet and cell phones.

I started studying my way out at 30, I quit at 33 and I am now 38.

But I didn't bother making it official until in my 50s.

I went inactive at 17 but always thought that it was just my ward that was the issue I was having and I'd be back to church soon.

Soon became never.

I considered myself out around 24 - 25. Officially resigned when I was 30.

I left at 23 a few years ago.
My sister left at 29
My younger brother at 18.
I have an older brother who probably never will.

We all left independently for our own reasons, but generally because both the doctrine didn't make sense and the social organization didn't resonate during college. We were all unmarried and not in a relationship with a Mormon when we left.

I think a fair generalization to make is people in their late teens and 20's who aren't attracted to Mormon culture, literal beliefs, and dating are the ones leaving the quickest right now, which seems to be quite a few outside of densely populated Mormon areas.

Been thinking about this thread. I wonder if this forum can be a true representation of the overal population leaving.

My reasoning for this is that I wonder if a forum like this is more frequented by people who left at a later age because they were in it longer and need more help coping with the fallout.

If I had left at age 18 or so I think maybe I would have just left and not needed this forum to help me cope with spouse issues, children issues, etc. I am just thinking outloud.

I became an atheist at age 14 and started cutting back on attending meetings. I became totally inactive at age 17. I had no friends in the church, as all my friends were nevermos. That saved me a lot of grief.