Another Sunday with the 8th grade sexuality education program, Our Whole Lives (OWL). This session dealt with abstinence – (just what IS abstinence?) and sexual decision making. How do we decide what we will or will not do and when and what are the consequences?

The young people came up with a definition of “sexual intercourse” as “Any behavior that could result in and STI or pregnancy.” Kissing was considered not sexual intercourse although we talked about spreading germs.

They were, as always, interested and engaged. We talked about couples bringing one another to orgasm without risking pregnancy or STIs – Funny, I don’t ever remember covering this when I used to teach Beehives!

What?! Teaching kids about healthy sexuality! Where is the shame and sense of condemnation they are supposed to learn at church?

is one that previous participants have chosen to share with their parents at the "celebration" at the end of class. This is a luncheon where the participants pick their favorite activities to have their parents participate in.

The game involves reading aloud a scenario in which two young people are trying to determine what sexual decision they will make. They move to a corner of the room based on multiple choice answers. Then each draws a card that represents a different "consequence" depending upon what they chose.

I always end up feeling a little embarrassed as my class members read aloud rather explicit passages to their parents to see what choice the older generation might make. Hearing a 13 year old boy who I had years ago directed as a 6 year old shepherd in a Christmas pageant call out "OK, so if you are going to choose masturbation go stand under the window," sometimes makes me cringe. But, we haven't lost a parent yet!

No shame or condemnation, but a good honest talk about consequences of choices.