I know many non mormons live in SLC and they are able to survive living there without major problems.However, parts of Idaho and Utah would be as Mormon dominated as posible.Have any long time exmormons or never momon people been treated differently or unfairly in these communities for no other reason then just being a non mormon,and in a way that could nver happen in a place like NYC or Chicago where non mormon surround you all the time?

I want to know if this is a serious problem.I do not mean Colora
do City or Hildale as a Mormon dominated community.Most polygs fear persecution by the monogamist dominated communities,and would not go out of their wayt o bother anybody else.

One example:

My mother was asked to manage a new store that was opening. The gentleman had recruited her from her job, interviewed her, told her the job was hers. Just a formality to meet with the district manager.

When she met with the D.M., he asked her a few questions. At the end of the interview, he said, "Oh, yes, you are LDS aren't you?"

"No"' said Mom. "I'm Protestant"

"Oh, well, we have to have someone who is LDS in this position; otherwise people won't shop at our store".

This was in the late 50's.

Richard Packham mentioned research that showed non-LDS in Utah don't live nearly as long as the faithful...

The gift this board gave me is recognizing that while I'm responsible for changing my circumstances, much of them are due to living in Salt Lake. I should've left long ago, I realize, but I have powerful ties here.

Our high school was in need of a teacher in a particularly difficult position to fill. When they found a perfect candidate, there was a disagreement among the school board members. Half voted against him.

The issue: he smoked.

Growing up I was discriminated against because I was the non mormon kid who's parents smoked.

In college, my mormon roommates shunned me and left me out of many "roommate bonding activities" because I wasn't mormon like them.

When I took the missionary discussions while in college, I had many mormon "friends". However, once I decided to become Catholic instead, these "friends" just magically disappeared.

I was a supervisor for 14 years. Many of my mormon subordinates caused me a lot of trouble. One that really gets me is one of my subordinates confided to another subordinate that if I didn't let her have a certain day off that she would call in to work sick so she could go to the temple. Some mormon subordinates liked tattling on me to the boss, often times exaggerating the truth, just to make themselves look good and me look bad. They also were two faced, acted like they were on my side one moment, but the moment I turned, they were stabbing me in the back. They tried pursuading others to go against me and were always underminding me in some form or matter. I'm sure if I had been mormon, they would have done all the could to cozy up to me instead of disrepecting me like that.

I know these experiences may not be as extreme as what many have experienced. But, I definitely have felt the sting of being discriminated against just because I'm not mormon.

Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 10/30/2012 12:21PM by liminal state.

Because I am not white and delightsome I almost always got the shunning from my "fellow brethren" until they found out I was Mormon. So I got into the habit of making shameless references to being Mormon just so I could "fit in".

Polygamous groups are generally extremely hostile toward outsiders, much moreso than mainstream mormons in Provo or Idaho Falls.

The town where I grew up was about 50% mormon. It divided pretty much along the lines of the professionals were mormons and the farmers (who had all the money) weren't.

There was one non-morg doctor in the whole town. Generally, he took care of everybody who wasn't a mormon.

Generally, the morg didn't hire non-morg and the non-morg didn't hire morg. The fact that farming is a 7 day a week job and required working on Sundays probably had an effect... When you're cutting rice, seven days a week, from before dawn to after dusk, for six weeks, you don't stop to go to church...

It was kind of bizarre...



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/30/2012 11:51PM by John_Lyle.

The demographics of our small community put the Mo population at ~14%, but they are a vocal 14%. Before we were married all of DH's family were supportive, inclusive, etc. We married just over three years ago and immediately there was a distinctly cooler demeanor from all of them, parents, siblings, kids, and previous Mo community members.

We decided to move this coming summer and the shock of his family was interesting. His parents had just traveled through Utah, Nevada and California visiting DH's sisters, aunt and nieces. When they remarked that our move 120 miles south, just off of the direct route they took, but well within a slightly altered route, was so very far away it struck me that they don't actually realize that we have been in the same town for three years and have hardly seen them.

We currently have a large house, but no family functions are held at our home because we aren't Mo - we are't even aware of most of the events they plan due to our being outside of the LDS circle.

Fascinating sociological experiences for me as a NeverMo; sad though.

All mormon town, 600 population and two wards fully attending...does that count? In Nevada?

when we got a new Physician Assistant to head our tiny clinic, another moron who had an LPN, but not the education (she was working on it) went aroung town and told people not to go to the clinic because the PA wasn't a Mormon.!!!Our PA was a well trained, very professional and NICE 7th Day Adventist!



A good Mormon gal who was not born into the bloodlines of the town got her hours cut at the school where she worked because she wasn't one of their relatives, and someone else wanted more hours who was related. She was 'an outside' mormon.

An experienced Den Mother with a couple of years of Boy Scouting moved in with her boys and asked to be a scout leader. She was turned down because she was nOT a mormon. Not because she didn't meet boy scout standards...she'd already been a scout leader.

Only mormons could be scout leaders in that town.

I lived in Idaho Falls for about 3 years, mid 1960s.

My apartment rent was 20 percent higher because I was non-mormon.

Local bank wouldn't let me start a checking account because I was a "transient" as soon as the officer found I was non-mo.

Elderly big-deal mormon ran a stop sign, t-boned my jeep. Cop knew him. He didn't get a ticket. I got a ticket for "unsafe speed for conditions." I was crossing the intersection at an idle due to slow truck ahead, perfectly clear dry weather.

Saw city crews on city time doing snow removal on mormon church parking lots; not other churches. I was the only one that thought it odd.

I grew up in IF and I've seen that done as well

Absolutely. All of the above. I live in SLC, in a neighborhood thought to be more mixed, but the snobbery and mistreatment is awful in our neighborhood and in the schools. I loved working in the PTA out of state, and worked my way up to be elected to the State Board of Education. But when we moved to SLC, the PTA's were dominated by the Mormons, and I felt uncomfortable, even though I was a faithful TBM at the time. The reasons? I was divorced. And I was new, from out-of-state.

I briefly worked part-time in an Utah State office with snarky Mormons just as Lurker99 described. I was ill, and on sick leave from my regular job, and I used to drive away from there at noon, and eat lunch in my car, to get away from there. The atmosphere was deadly. There was always someone crying in the bathroom, and people quitting all the time, because some of the bosses were especially abusive. One woman, in another department, had been there for 5 years, and liked her job, but was fired for no good reason. The next day, the new supervisor's daughter had taken the woman's place. All Mormons. Mormons discriminate against each other!

all the time. I think it all starts with the "I need to climb over anyone I have to, to get my family to the CK" mentality.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/30/2012 09:42AM by mav.

Lived and worked in Utah County. I was highly valued at my place of employment, until I left the cult and got divorced. Then, out of the blue, I was fired. In my termination letter, my boss even said I was great at my job.

I told him to his face that I knew he was firing me because of my religious and marital status. Without shock, hesitation or pause, he responded, "How about some severance pay?" Of course I took the money and ran. But this episode was enormously destructive in my life. Years later and I'm still trying to dig out of the financial hole this threw me into.

I've posted this before. In my old ward were a couple of married dental school students from Utah my wife & I were good friends with. They were attending the large state university medical school where we lived in the Midwest. They told me there was a person on the dental school baord who was LDS and selected LDS-only students for admission. Apparently she and the other board members had divvied up the number of students for admission and she was doing her best to "build up the kingdom" with mormon dentists.

If a person is outside the group, they often reap the results of that position. It happens in neighborhoods, and schools, and work environments not just a particular religious neighborhood.

Human beings often have a difficult time accepting people that are different. I don't have any trust that will change....ever!!

There is a difference with mo neighborhoods. Yes it can happen with any religion or group, but there is something more subtle and disconcerting about mos in utah.

I've lived on both sides of that and that is my experience.

And yes, ex-mo's are more evil than inactives or never-mos. Maybe it's because they know we are stronger than them for being able to leave, or that we might cause their testimonies to waiver.

I don't ever even get asked about religion here, a refreshing change that I do enjoy. Although I do enjoy spreading the word if it comes up...the truth that is.

My mom worked for a photography company that does school pictures, and it's owned by Mormons, so she and the other non-Mormon were the outsiders. My mom thinks that the reason she wasn't asked to help with makeups was that she wasn't Mormon and was never going to convert. Ironically, she got a teaching position this year at a charter school, and the same company took her picture but they didn't recognize her. That company is based out of Utah, so the Mormons who work there aren't as accepting of non-Mormons than non-Utah Mormons.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/30/2012 03:05PM by adoylelb.

I live in Utah County. Discrimination based on lack of LDS credentials and belief happens all the time...even among one's own family.

Many Mormons consistently exhibit arrogant and judgmental behavior. You can expect that, even if a person appears to be "nice".

As a child I was taught, in LDS meetings, not to associate with people who don't follow "our same principles", and that everyone would become a Mormon, if not in this life, in the afterlife. I was also taught the LDS church is the "one and only true church on the earth", and that if someone didn't accept the teachings of the missionaries they were less in-tune with the spirit (read that inferior) and that anyone that leaves the church is being influenced by the devil or not as spiritually strong as those who stay (read that inferior). And lastly, but certainly not all, in the premortal existence there was a war and only the most devoted spirits were sent to Mormon homes on earth, at birth.

Arrogance and being judgmental are taught from a young age in the LDS church.

Not being treated differently in mormon dominated communities is the EXCEPTION. Discrimination is typically the rule.

Several years ago I worked for an lds man in Oregon. He was the largest commercial and residential rental property owner in the county. As a manager for several of his large apartment communities, I screened/hired job applicants. Never, under any circumstances, would I be allowed to hire someone who was not Mormon. Never. *except* the weekend manager who had to work Sundays. Huh.

And he was quite proud of the fact that he could pay these young lds couples basically peanuts to be his little slaves. This guy was in a class by himself. One thing though, he was very much the same personality type as my father. So I didn't get sucked into his little game, I'd already had enough bsers in my life. Luckily, I held my ground and made a good living. But the tbm assistant manager couples? Not so much. Discrimination happens. All. The. Time.

My own experience living in Utah for more than 35 years is that Mormons are less threatened by non Mormons than ex Mormons. Anyone who has never been Mormon is always a potential convert and allowances are made for their "ignorance" in not being a member. The person who leaves the fold is a different animal completely who might pose pose some kind of threat they cannot deal with. My well paid job with a well known and very Mormon Salt Lake company terminated very quickly once it became known I was no longer in the fold. My only regret looking back is that circumstances at the time required me to accept their severance package rather than suing their pants off.

...in the '70s in Salt Lake, my siblings and I had interesting dating experiences. My brother was told by his high-school girlfriend's dad that he couldn't date her anymore because he wasn't Mormon and wouldn't be going on a mission. I think they wanted him to convert. He left the relationship disgusted and heartbroken.

Throughout my childhood and into my teenage years, the parents of my on-again/off-again Mormon boyfriend didn't like me around because I wasn't Mormon. If he ever reads RfM, which I highly doubt, he'll know this is me because of this wish he told me when I had joined the church: He said that in the fifth grade, he prayed to Heavenly Father that I would become Mormon so he could marry me.

Cute. But sad. Most of my Mormon friends told me that I was "perfect" except I wasn't Mormon. After I joined (that's another story), this boyfriend proposed to me by saying that because I was new in the church I needed guidance and he would be the one to guide me through our lives together. Some part of the nevermo-feminist in me was still intact and I declined his offer of celestial servitude.

My husband runs a small business that has been struggling because of the economic downturn. A TBM friend suggested he shave his beard because having a beard is a dead giveaway of his non-Mormon status and TBMs are 'more comfortable' dealing with another Mormon.

My DD had a boy cancel a date after he discovered she wasn't Mormon saying "I just assumed you were Mormon because you're so nice!"

After my DD did convert, her RM boyfriend broke up with her because he could 'do better' than a convert wife.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/31/2012 11:36AM by caedmon.

I grew up in a small town in northern Utah during the 50s and 60s. My father was a no Mo, my mother was a lapsed Mo. Both smoked, so I alway smelled of smoke. In spite of their beliefs, they sent me to the Mormon church, probably so I would fit in the local culture. But because of the smell of cigarette smoke, everyone knew I was not totally one of them.

Interestingly, I never felt like I was being discriminated against. But, I also ran with the kids that were on the fringes of the church. Oh, and probably more importantly, my father was a police officer that didn't kowtow to local members so I think that out of fear and respect, I was treated well in the community.

At college in the morridor, guys who'd been raised Mormon refused to date me because I was a convert with never-mo relatives. They could "do better" and didn't want their future kids to have no-Mo grandparents.

Years later, I did a phone tech support job for a software company in Utah. There was one other pagan there. He brought his tarot deck to work and was promptly disciplined, even though other workers and team leads brought Ensigns, scriptures, and other church lit to work and even read out loud when they weren't on the phone with customers. When Other Pagan complained about the unfairness, he was given a choice: shut up or be fired.

Then, management came out with a new policy: no reading allowed except for job-related training manuals. BUT...the church mags and scriptures still stayed out in full view, the TBMs kept reading them, and NOBODY ever got in trouble for it.

Other Pagan and I both eventually left the company.

Yep... after I was laid off from my job years ago, I had a hard time finding a new one. During one interview, i had one guy ask me if i had served a mission. When i told him no, that was the end of the interview.

Had more than one experience like that regarding mormons. The funny thing is, most of the TBMs I've worked with in my field that graduated from the lard's university have been the dumbest people you will ever find.

I have never lived in a Mo-dominated area.


But I have lived my life in areas where Mormons were very scarce (the deep south), and I know that I have suffered employment and other forms of discrimination many times over the years IF I allowed folks to know I was a Mormon.


As a result, I went to great lengths to keep folks -- especially employers -- from knowing I was LDS.


Fortunately, I never attended BYU, so I didn't have THAT clear LDS mark on my resume.