Hi Folks

I asked my kids who would win in a cherry spitting contest. The devil or Jesus.

We figured, probably Jesus, as he can spit across the galaxy, whereas the Devil, according the Cult, is confined to this earth, and therfore can only spit across the planet.

I then asked them, what about astronauts on the moon or on the space station, are they free from Satan's temptations? One of of sons ssaid that because the moon and the spacestation is in the earth's orbit, Satan could probably get to them there as well. And, no doubt, spit cherries that far.

Having said that, there is one area where the Devil can outspit Jesus. Do you remember when the fake prophet, Joe fell out of his canoo? Rather than just admit to being useless, he decided to use the old mormon line, "it's the Devil's fault." Joe suddenly received a revelation from the mormon god telling him that Satan had power over the water (and presumably in the water).

Therefore, according to basics of mormon theology, the Devil has power over the water and can take the first prize over Jesus every time, in a cherry spitting contest.

You'll probably see the above nonsense in another crazy section of the mormon doctrine and convenants one day.

Then again, maybe not.

Kind regards

Grey

He does it missionary position every time.

...I spit a milkdud 32 feet and won a dream date for two in a movie theater promotion contest. Got a limo for the night, dinner for two, a movie and a couple gallons of ice cream to take home.

I could probably spit a cherry pit farther than Jesus or Satan any day.

This is my favorite question:

If Jesus is as powerful as we are told.....is it possible for him to microwave a burrito so hot he himself cannot eat it?