A bishop goes golfing on Sunday. St. Peter is standing next to God, watching the Bishop golf. At the first hole, he hits a hole in one. Same thing with the second hole, and so on, through the entire round.
St. Peter is astounded and said, "Why are you letting him do this? He's breaking the Sabbath."
I always heard it this way. One to open the meeting and to call on another to say the prayer. One to say the prayer. One to anoint the light bulb with oil. One to sing a special musical number. One to seal the anointing. The first one gets up to call on another one to say the closing prayer, imploring this person to not forget to bless the food. Last one to bring the food of green jello and Hawaiian punch.
That's seven and all of their families, and since there better be an investigator and the missionaries we will round up to ten just to be safe.
1. Jews do not recognize Jesus as Messiah, only as a Jewish prophet. 2. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian faith, only the leader of the Catholic Church. 3. Nation of Islam does not recognize either Jesus or the Pope. 4. Mormons do not recognize each other at the liquor store or at Hooters.
A Mormon bishop had three sons. Two were Mormons and one wasn't. One cold morning he was standing with his back to the fire when one Mormon son came down and told him of a dream he had had that night about dying and going to heaven.
"And what was it like there my son?" "Oh, a wonderful place father, St. Peter at the pearly gates etc."
The second Mormon son comes down and relates he had a dream about going to heaven.
"And what was it like there my son?" "Oh, a wonderful place father, St. Peter at the pearly gates etc."
The non-Mormon son comes down and tels him of a dream he had of dying and going to Hell.
"And what was it like there my son?" "pretty much the same as here - you couldn't get near the fire for Mormons!"
Ha!GREAT ones so far... So this guy dies and goes to heaven. St. Peter is showing him around. They pass by a group of people praying and crossing themselves,and the man turns to St. Peter and asks "who are they?" and St. Peter replies "Oh them? They are the Catholic people," and they move on. The next group they come upon are praying and singing and the man again turns and asks who they are, and St. Peter says "Those are the Baptists". Some time later they come upon a third group, watching a man speak, stone silent..and the man asks "WHO ARE THEY?" To which St. Peter said "SHHHHHHHH those are the Mormons..and they think they are the only ones here".....bwahahaha!