So, I recently told my Parents that I no longer believe. When I talked to them, I clearly explained that it was because of historical/doctrinal issues that were brought to my attention. I also clearly explained that I was not offended, I wasn't just too lazy to attend, I had a strong testimony before, etc.

In a recent discussion, despite what I previously said, I was accused of just not wanting to keep the commandments, and they reasoned that "I must not have had a very strong testimony." A cousin who gave his homecoming talk last Sunday also talked about how "If you don't continue going to church/reading your scriptures consistently, the spirit will leave/you'll lose your testimony."

So my parents argued this point as well, also mentioning that I'd only been to the temple once since I returned from my Mission. (Because OBVIOUSLY if I'd gone over the patriarchal grip a few more times I wouldn't have been shaken when I learned about Polyandry).

So, my question is, why is it so hard for Mormons to believe that people leave over doctrinal issues?


PS- My Parents wanted to know some of the reasons I no longer believe, So I wrote them a 12 page paper outlining my issues with the Book of Mormon, the Book of Abraham, and the Kinderhook Plates. (Basically tying in Joe's horrendous track-record when it comes to translating ancient documents). That was two days ago, and I haven't heard anything about it. I'll let you know if they bring it up.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 07/13/2012 06:40PM by smoteheadofshiz.

Reality bites.

Cant' wait to hear. My guess is they will make an emotional appeal to you based on "feelings" and not on the evidence presented.

Experiences such as yours illustrate how well the church indoctrinates its members. It is sickening! Be patient and consider that it literally takes YEARS for the indoctrination to take full effect, so anticipate spending a lot of time yourself getting your message through to them.

Good luck and please keep us updated on how things happen in the future.

I gave my parents a 3 page explanation. The first page was a list of Smith's wives, ages and other husbands. The second page was the best racist quotes. The third page was my conclusion. Basically, "and there are piles and piles of documented facts that prove the church false. Please remember the 11th article of faith."

Then I showed them Joseph's wives on the church website.

We've never discussed it since. A week later my mom handed me a huge stack of papers that were supposed to explain everything away, apologetic explanations, lots of attacks on early apostates and saying that we shouldn't expect perfection from our leaders. It was all meaningless. Then a week after that she emailed me a talk by Hinckley that basically said we should ignore everything bad about Smith.

The TBMs have nothing that stands up to the facts.

I'm tempted to email the Business Weekly article but they'll just come up with more lame excuses.

Maybe you'll be lucky and your parents will see the light from the info you gave them. Give them some time. I'm hoping the info I gave my parents is slowly sinking in and they'll be free some day.

It's so hard for them to believe people leave over doctrinal issues is because to them the doctrine and the church is perfect so there must be something wrong with us.

All those facts are just antimormon lies. The whole world is conspiring against the one true church. Science, history etc have all altered the facts to make the church look false. It is a test of faith.

Now that I've been out a few years, I interpret them as saying, "unless you continue to brainwash yourself, common sense and logic might take over."

That sucks - sorry.

I think one of the keys to dealing with this is to call them out on it directly.

Something like:
"I find it very offensive and insulting that you would say that and accuse me of that."

If you haven't check out "Top 10 Mormon Problems Explained" on youtube yet, you should. It would also be a great thing to share with someone who wants a list of our concerns...

The church brainwashes the membership from birth to think that anyone who leaves is a lazy, weak sinner. This is to hide the reality of why people leave.

After "deeply studying" the gospel for over 40 years and delving into The Journal of Discourses -- Times and Seasons --History of the Church-- Morning and Evening Star --Millennial Star, etc.-etc. --I have come to the conclusion that the average member really has absolutely no idea of what was taught in the first *60 YEARS* of the Church.(Follow the Brethren Today !!!)

What is taught nowadays is a pale shadow of the early radical doctrines and teachings or requirements... Over 60% of the early Church doctrinal teachings have been totally erased or submerged and buried in the root cellar.

The reason that many people leave nowadays is because they love the watered down variety of Mormonism. Just imagine being asked to give your home and businesses and all your wealth to the Church, by a Deed of Consecration, leaving your home country and Gather to Zion.

With the Internet and Google laying open the original condensed verson of doctrine,the shock to their systems is so severe they run from the Church and never look back...

JB

>So, my question is, why is it so hard for Mormons to believe that people leave over doctrinal issues?

Because there are no doctrinal issues. The Church is perfect. The Church is true. The Church is the restored gospel of Christ. It's plain and simple truth, so what could there possibly be to disagree with? If you actually had a strong testimony, if you KNEW the truthfulness of the gospel the way your parents did, you would obviously embrace it.

The "doctrinal" issues you have aren't actually about church doctrines, but church practices (such as keeping the WoW, paying tithing, fulfilling your callings, etc.). The doctrines are perfect just the way they are. Finding fault with them is like finding fault with a tree for having too much wood in it. It's just you looking for something to complain about to justify your own shortcomings.

I think it stems from the grass is greener concept. They are satisfied with Mormonism....works for them.

If you want something else it must mean you want more... you want to taste what's on the otherside of the fence that you are not allowed as a moron. Its simplistic black and white thinking.

*

When someone leaves the Mormon church, other active Members need it to be for a silly reason -- not a solid one

When my ex-Mormon husband and I told his parents we were leaving the church and divorcing - because we had married under pressure to do so at BYU, they had a heart attack. My ex, still a good friend who lives in Arizona, said to his Mom, "but what if it is really not true?" She replied; "then I have suffered all these years being a Mormon for nothing." She was born into the church and served a mission in Sweden. She said her mission had been 'difficult' for her as she did nor really believe in the church. Her father, a GA told her she just had to keep on living as a devoted LDS member until her testimony was strong. I never heard her bare her testimony. I wonder if this poor woman did every thing in her life to please her father and very domineering husband. What a sad life. To live in denial was her option it seems.

I think parents like yours might also be afraid in the same way -- they have put up with so much, have given so much to the church, so that in the end they can't face the fact it is all a hoax. Jim Jones oddly had defenders even after he used Kool-aid on his followers.

When I first realized the church was not what it claims, my first thoughts were of all the things i've suffered.

All my life (57 years) I have suffered persecution from mormons in one form or another. Many of those mormons were my family. All of that suffering and misery was heaped upon me in the name of the mormon church. it was all for nothing. It was all over a false religion.

That is not a good excuse to KEEP suffering. I don't care how old you are! The truth is the truth. If you keep up the charade after you know the truth, THAT is suffering for nothing.

I would make a couple of suggestions for answering questions.

Keep all of your statements directly related to the facts. You will be asked questions and statements will be asserted about your behavior.

Do not answer them. Refuse to answer any personal questions and state that has nothing to do with the facts. Keep all attention focused on the facts about LDS Inc that they do not want to talk about.

"So, my question is, why is it so hard for Mormons to believe that people leave over doctrinal issues?"

They are subject to mind control and it never enters their heads that there could EXIST ANY doctrinal issues, period!!!!

After I explained in depth why I no longer believed in God, my sister somehow made the leap of blaming my loss of faith on being angry with god.

Ummmm . . . no. . . I am not mad at the invisible diety I don't believe exists.

The interesting thing is that years later, her daughter went on a facebook tirade against vocal atheists who are mad at God. The wording took me right back . . . I wonder how many times they've spoken that similar phrase (about me???). They don't even realize that it makes ZERO sense.

But somehow, it helps them blame the unbelievers, rather than giving them credit for thinking things through and reaching another conclusion. Perhaps that makes them feel better. And they don't have to examine the faults in their beliefs.