Just found out that my cousin, whose father is Stake Pres, is pregnant and not married. Surely this will take some of the attention off of us for leaving TSCC. Since premarital sex is the sin next to murder, of course that is a lot worse than calling JS a fraud. Who knows, just excited to see that someone else in the family screwed up in their eyes. Satan must have gotten her too.

Now being serious- the sad part of this is they are probably making her feel terrible and go through some horrible repentance process.

I feel for the girl. It's going to be a destructive time in her life, most likely...

'Some horrible repentance process...'


Or maybe not. One never knows in the morg. Some are disfellowshipped, some next to nothing including being able to still take the sacrament.

Return and report on the shunning or lack thereof.

Maybe she will get strong armed like my friend. Everything was going nicely as long as she was going to place the baby with a family the bishop knew (not using LDS social services) but when she decided to keep the baby...disfellowshipped.

Is her name Bristol Palin ?

This gives you the opportunity to slip out the back door while nobody's looking.

It's going to be a busy time for the grandparents. My daughters friend had a baby when she was 16. Her parents quit gossiping and judging everyone, as was their habit.

Maybe they'll do what they did to a friend of mine. Put her up in some boarding house in another state when until the pregnancy was over, then send the baby to LDS adoption services, and pretend the whole thing never happened.

They are extremely fond of this practice.

Our old Bishop did that to his daughter, too.

However, I never caved to the pressure and kept my child. I was of course shunned for doing that.

The pressure to give up your child is enormous! You are made to feel guilty daily and told that you are selfish for wanting to keep your own child and not allow a TBM couple to adopt.

"Out of wedlock" is VERY 1950s...

I know a couple who did that to their daughter, shipping her almost 1000 miles. The father of the baby found out where she was and starting the process of suing. Of course in Utah, they don't recognize such rights of the father from another state so girl ended up giving up her baby to.....wait for it....LDSSS!

I guess she still felt guilty years later because she didn't get married in the temple...and it was a beautiful wedding with ALL family and friends invited.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/10/2012 06:35PM by Now a Gentile.

Yeah, they've got a lot of work to do to convince her to give the baby up for adoption...

like mitt romeny tried to do to his babysitter, they will try to make her give the baby to LDS family services, if she refuses they will proberly ex her

I remember this happening in our ward. Parents were active, kids considered troublemakers (to be honest, I'm not sure how much of troublemakers they actually were, considering the tendency of Mormons to villify anyone who doesn't conform). But one of the daughters got pregnant out of wedlock, It kind of pissed me off when the grandparents brought in the baby for its blessing and the father blessed the baby to "be an example to your mother, who is so lost right now." Small wonder the girl never came back to church.

...I thought our family was perfect. Nothing bad ever happened to us because we lived the gospel. So I felt tremendous pressure not to screw up. I didn't want to break the spell. I was so relieved when a niece got knocked up. (Self-centered of me, no?)

No one spoke a single word of it to me. I was surprised to see my niece 8 months pregnant at a family gathering.

In my family of origin, if no one talked about it it didn't happen.

This happened to my sister in law and some how my mother in law put the spin on it that it was somehow ok because heavenly father wanted that spirit down here with the family.

It is really quite a crazy story that I will have to write on here at some point.. the pregant sister was going to give the baby to another sister, she backed out of that because she didn't think that she would be a good mother and instead gave the baby to the prude sister.. The whole family is fighting, won't talk to each other, and yet it was somehow all OK because it was god's will.

Interestingly enough (but sadly) the pregnant sister learned after the birth that she has the HPV std.

Crazy stuff out here in Zion!!!

Here's the thing. She "made a mistake" and can repent. You, on the other hand, have chosen to follow Satan.

Sorry, but her situation will be forgotten long before they stop trying to reel you back in.

It's sad for the girl when this happens, but I get a secret kick from seeing these pious, self-righteous parent get their big attitude adjustment.

I always thought about how I'd handle this scenario if one of my daughters got pregnant out of wedlock, which they didn't. (Luck or smart girls, who knows..)

I think they knew how I felt. I'd never have judged them and would have been supportive. The idea of adopting a baby out just to get things "back the way they were" is repugnant to me. No matter how it was conceived, that's my grandchild!!

There are of course situations where adoption would be needed, but my preferences would be:

1. Help her raise the child. Grandparents are great as nurturers.

2. If she and her boyfriend want to make a go of it, marriage could conceivably be good... depends on their maturity, desire and commitment.

Too many people take the attitude that the family is now shamed, the daughter is a sinner, and we have to get the child out of the picture.

Once (very long ago in the land of California) my SP's daughter got pregnant. While people were still trying to handle that one, she and her LDS boyfriend went to Tijuana and tied the not, thus complicating things. Her father and the boy's father had the marriage annulled. At that point, I left for college and didn't come back. I don't know what happened. It's complicated for any family to handle. What ratchets it up is the "knowledge" that they have sinned a sin that is "second only to murder" in its seriousness.

...I have to agree with the poster who pointed out that it is your own APOSTACY which will continue to be viewed as the worse sin. Don't you see, when you apostasize you have denied the Holy Ghost, which truly is the one UNFORGIVABLE sin. As SHOCKING as the young girl's sexual immorality is, your own conscious decision to choose to follow Satan will be viewed as FAR WORSE by your Mormon family and friends.

What a crock. All those spirits waiting to be brought to earth, but when God decides to send one not BIC (but to a church member) it's horrible. C'mon, is it simple biology, or heaven sending spirits into earthly tabernacles, or whatever they call it in FPR's? I'd try that on a TBM and see what they say; they'd probably come back with some stupid rationalization about how the baby's spirit doesn't enter until the mother feels the baby kick in the "quickening" or whatever they call it in FPR's.

Is it a mistake by God, or is it the way things have procreated for millions of years? Too bad it doesn't fit their carefully scripted existence.

...that at least they didn't have an abortion? Correct me if I'm wrong, but I am going to assume abortion is a major no-no in the LDS church. A young woman nowadays can no doubt go online and find a place to terminate her pregnancy without anyone ever finding out (well, if she doesn't live in a place like Mississippi)...yet if she chooses to go through with the pregnancy she is a horrible sinner? Shunning and shaming these mothers no doubt encourages other girls and women in their situations to abort.