I've been out of the morg for close to 2 years now and I am still having "flashbacks" and panic attacks. How long before they start to subside, or will it ever stop? I see a counselor, but I don't think he really understands what I've been thru with he Mormons. Now my stomach is starting to hurt again cause of the flashbacks. Any suggestions on how you dealt with flashbacks and panic attacks after leaving the cult?

If so, you're making progress.

If not, perhaps it might help to pinpoint what triggers them. Then you could avoid the triggers or try to immerse yourself in them as a way of desensitizing yourself.

For example, do you get the willies by walking by a church? You could avoid it. Or you could go there on purpose, look at it defiantly, flip it off, cuss under your breath, and tell yourself your comfort is more important than any brick structure built by a bogus cult.

I'm sure I'd still get nasty feelings if morgbots showed up at my door. I feel much better since I have had them legally banned from my property. I need to live and function in a mormon free zone to feel well. So setting boundaries is what's worked for me.

If you are not feeling like your counselor is hearing you, be certain to tell them exactly that. If they cannot connect with you on this issue, you should find a different counselor. Therapy is a relationship, and you should find one that is right for you.

The good news is that it gets better, and time does help. Keep finding forums, like this one, where you can talk about your experiences and feel supported.

The church damages people. And I am still angry for all the non-sense and time wasted on an institution that absolutely did not care about me at all. It only cared about if I did what it said I had to do. Not how I felt, not how the church affected me. Anything negative I experienced I was blamed for. That's called Cult 101.

The good news is that I am so much happier and fulfilled now that the church is long gone in my rear-view mirror. :)



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 12/10/2010 05:00AM by redlinzus.

feel guilty, like I was doing something bad and had to do something else even if I was gardening, or playing with my dogs. Ingrained guilt and feelings of self hatred are difficult things to get over, especially if you were born in the cult.

You should talk to a doctor. These feelings are cult-think, not normal.

Transcendental meditation for 20 minutes a day is really helpful for anxiety of any kind. It trains the mind, helping strengthen new neural connections, so that when panic threatens the brain has an easier time regulating anxiety and remaining peaceful. It's a technique that builds in efficacy as you do it for several weeks.

Too much togetherness. They slowly faded over the years and are now very rare. I probably should have seen someone over them but I didn't really realize what was going on at the time. I found that as you figure out your needs and take the time to put yourself first, it really, really helps. For example, I need time alone so when I was having a panic attack, I'd pretty much keep a low profile for a day or two until I felt recovered. I'd stay by myself, make some comfort food and keep busy with something I felt comforting. I'd pretty much tune out distractions and focus on myself and as I regained control of who was in my life, when, where, etc. I just had fewer and fewer. But it would have been better to have a therapist walk me through that. I agree with the poster who said it's important to have a therapist who understands you and to find another one if the one you are currently seeing isn't connecting with you. Take care of yourself.