This is just a thread about therapy and medication for those of the board who care.

My first experience with real, consistent therapy came right after my failed mission. I went for several sessions and I liked the therapist somewhat. The sessions helped but the therapist wanted to get me onto an anti-depressant which I was opposed to at the time.

I wasn't opposed to the medication in theory, I was opposed to it for me specifically. I didn't think that it was right for me. So after the few sessions where the therapist said, "I really want you on something to continue our sessions," I bowed out.

I felt a lot better and didn't need to see someone for a few more years. Once I did feel the need for a counselor, I only went for several sessions. I needed to talk about the church, and she was a member. After she called me an anti-Mormon, I was done with her. I didn't see a therapist until after I moved to California.

Living in a new state and having a new job that required a lot of travel sent my PTSD symptoms into high gear, and I desperately needed to see someone again. Luckily, I found a really good therapist right away - and the Mormon thing was something of a fascination for him. We talked a lot about it, and he was very supportive of me writing my book (he thought it would be very theraputic for me. And it was; though all that whiskey I consumed probably wasn't the best for me).

After some time in therapy we discussed possible medications. I was still not sold on the idea about it, but he made some very good arguments that seemed tailored for my situation. He wanted me to try low dosages and only to be on something temporarily. He mentioned this because therapy was helping a lot and because even though I was having issues - it wasn't affecting my daily life too much. Somtimes people have such severe symptoms that they shut down completely, and medication is sometimes necessary. But for me, therapy and a temporary low dose would most likely be good enough.

I agreed to it and we began to experiment with drugs in a legal manner. It took several different drugs to figure out what would work for me. I found out that I am VERY sensitive to anti-anxiety/anti-depressants and had several bad reactions to certain kinds. But after some time I found one that worked and it became manageable even though I still had some of the side effects.

After about six months I went off, and things were much better. It was helpful for me to transition completely out of the church and that's when I started writing as well.

Things were ok and I was only seeing my therapist about once a month until about six months ago when my marriage was on its last breaths. I went back into therapy more and decided to go back on the medication temporarily to get through this period of @#$%& storminess.

I tried a new medication that had very rare but severe side effects. I of course got the side effects and had to go back onto the previous medication.

Those of you who have been through the divorce process know that it is not nearly as much fun as a weekend with Batman, and I have to say that the medication has really helped during this time. I'm functioning at a much higher level than I would be without it. The plan is for me to go off the medication around June or so - and I should be fine for hopefully quite some time.

For those of you who are struggling with whatever - I am a big supporter of therapy if you feel it will be right for you. However, therapy is very tricky in Utah. The first counselor I saw was part of LDS family services, and that turned into a nightmare. I was 19 and had to walk out early because of what happened. And then I mentioned the woman who called me an "anti-Mormon" and I had to stop seeing her too. So therapy is good, but finding the right therapist can be tricky.

That's the same thing with medication. It's not right for everyone, but finding a good therapist can really help with that process too. Some people don't need medication, other people need some temporary help, and some people need to be on meds for their entire lives.

I'll tell you what won't help your depression though - going to "the church." You might as well just read Sylvia Plath's entire collected works all in one sitting.

Raptor Jesus Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I'll tell you what won't help your depression
> though - going to "the church." You might as well
> just read Sylvia Plath's entire collected works
> all in one sitting.


That made me giggle.

It's good that you are finding things are are helping you. I wish some of my family members would do that instead of just upping the 'pay, pray and obeying' that is the cause in the first place...

I know I shouldn't be, but I am so embarrassed with my inability to deal with my problems on my own. I wish I was stronger. Thanks for this RJ...lot's of useful info.

After your therapist strikes that idea down, you will become more powerful than you can possibly imagine.

Thanks for this post... I am going to a counselor as well. I love her. I was going to an LDS counselor at first too and he was your typical condescending mormon jerk. I'm glad I found the counselor I have even though she is costing me an arm and a leg.

It takes guts to come out and say you need help. I know I want to hide that I'm seeking out help for my divorce and my own issues. But getting help is better than pretending it will all go away.

I desperately need a therapist as well in SLC. I miss the one I use to have in southern utah. She had just the right amount of sympathy and tough love to straighten me out. Some of the therapists Ive met here are far too fluffy and insincere. Oh... and I am covered by both my mother's and father's insurance, but none of them have the therapy I need. *rolls eyes* So I need to find an alternative method of payment for someone as helpless and broke as me. Haha. Sadly, I need someone who knows how to deal with self physical and emotional abuse as well. Help! Does anyone know someone who can help me?

This is who I go to... she is amazing and will work with money situations. She tells you exactly how she sees it. There is no BS with her.

http://www.healthefamilynow.com/

I've dealt with depression on and off my whole life. Mormons have gone through phases with how they react to someone who suffers from it. Up until I was about 25, I was told that I was depressed because I was sinning or wasn't working hard enough. I saw a LDS Social Services person at BYU who started our session with "So, what is it? Drugs? Alcohol? Sex? What is making you depressed."

After that it was "Let's find the right medication at the right dosage that works for YOU." That's because it must be something chemical, since the problem can't possibly be with the Church. In fact, I think LDS Social Services was created to make those who aren't made happy by Mormonism look like they're crazy.

I did have one anomalous Mormon therapist who helped me get over most of the pain associated with my mission in just three sessions. He was the first person who actually validated my feelings that my mission president acted improperly and said and did things that were emotionally traumatic for me. Just having someone make that admission was half of what I needed. The other half was the appropriate therapy.

Ultimately though, I found that the best thing I could do for my emotional well-being was to say to the LDS Church:

"FUCK YOU!" *finger*

and move on to bigger and better things. The Church was the cause of my depression -- plain and simple. Once I did that, moved out of Utah, and dissociated myself from its brainwashed minions, the depression was gone. Funny that.

Divorce is another, entirely different matter however. The depression from that is actually worse -- especially if you have kids -- but it's doable, you know? With a divorce, it's a matter of solving those legal, financial, emotional, and other problems one at a time. With Mormonism, it's a big pile of WTF hanging over your head all the time, with even the professionals telling you there's something wrong with you. That's not as straightforward.

I'm glad you're doing better. I did a lot of writing too when I first left the Church. It was a big help to me and a good way to express what I was feeling and get it out of my system. Best of luck to you, RJ.

Don't feel embarrassed about your situation. Do you hear people with diabetes being embarrassed about their plight? Or people with heart problems being embarrassed? You have a chemical imbalance in your brain and it can't be helped. Unfortunately, mental illness still has a stigma, but I want you to know that you should not be embarrassed in any way, shape or form. And good on you for trying to deal with it. Good luck and don't give up! You are incredibly brave for finding the intestinal fortitude to find a remedy!

I was so lucky. The first time I went to see a therapist I lived in Ohio. It just so happens she was raised in a strict Jewish home. She totally understood what religion can do to your head. She understood what it was like to have parents that put religion before everything and everyone else. When I told her I was raised mormon, she asked all of the right questions.

It was very helpful for me to talk to someone who understood how traumatic religion can be. I don't know if there are many therapists out there who really "get" how religion can traumatize you.

I think a supportive, Loyal family is about 90% of good mental health UNLESS you're suffering from an organic disease.

I'm curious to hear what the wise people who did benefit from therapy think/say about that.

When someone you love hurts you, that's devistating; Mormons, when they're the one(s) imposing hurt on others tend to blow it off (don't they?).

I had to go back on 10 mg of Prozac last March when I lost my 14-year-old dog--the one who was there through my worst years. I've just tapered off of it. It did help me through the worst of the mourning--and my panic attacks over it. It is nice to be off of it again.

I was able to go off Prozac after 20 or so years when I let go of mormonism and feeling my ex was damned for being gay. It feels good to really feel--which I didn't do on Prozac and especially not on Effexor.

BUT I have been in therapy on and off for 14 years now--with an exmo therapist (who I didn't even know was exmo back when I started with him). I just lucked out. The talk therapy is really what saved me. Thing is--you have to find the right therapist.

Is it hard to go off meds? Are there lots of bad side effects? I am a massive hypochondriac, and even though I know I would probably benefit from going on anti anxiety pills, I am terrified to. I hear so many horror stories about getting addicted, or becoming depressed or dependent...ugh.

Don't let other people's stories scare you. If you're going to a good therapist they will work with you until you find what helps you. If you do go off of them,(Meds) it does need to be gradual.

Think about it. Is it easier to live with anxiety, and depression?

Addiction isn't usually an issue unless you're in a situation where you need pain meds. Even then, what's your worst option? Chronic pain or addiction?

I don't think you're in a situation where you need to be worried about addiction.

If you can find an anti anxiety med or anti depressant that helps you, you should take advantage of that.

You may find that talk therapy is all you need. Don't worry about problems you may not even have. In other words, don't worry until you need to. It's a waste of energy to worry about problems you don't have.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/13/2012 12:16AM by Mia.

I've never had problems going off Prozac in terms of side effects. You just start taking 1 every other day and then 1 every third day. I also take lorazepam--but I use it sparingly. I like having it--they call it "pill in the pocket" where you know you have access to a pill, so the anxiety isn't as hard to deal with. I went for YEARS (like 30) without anything for the panic and anxiety. I finally got lorazepam from my doctor when my dog died. My panic always happens in the middle of the night. I've been through a lot--and you'd think someone would have given me something all those years. I had to basically beg for Prozac.

THEN I tried lexapro. I became suicidal. I tried Zoloft somewhere in there. Tried Paxil. Then my last doctor put me on Effexor and I think Lamictal. Going off those was living h*ll. The doctor wouldn't help me unless I agreed to go on something else--so I looked it up on line. It said to switch immediately to Prozac and take Prozac for a few weeks and then taper off Prozac. That worked. I had what they call "brain shivers" from going off Effexor.

Like my current doctor said--Prozac has been around for a long time and it always works for me. If the dose goes too high, I become unable to get off the bed. I call it painful numbness.

I feel better off the meds--except I like having lorazepam in case I wake up in the middle of the night and need it for the panic attacks.

Walking and talk therapy have helped me more than anything, but the edge that Prozac takes off has helped a lot when I needed it.

With anti-anxiety meds, it is a matter of taking them sparingly I believe (like xanax and klonopin).

I will start seeing a therapist in May. I've become pretty emotionally detached in response to traumatic events, where I was too emotionally involved.

But I'm having a hard time being empathetic or feeling any kind of sad type of emotion.

I can't take mood-stabilizers or anti-depressants. I've been on most of them and they made me a wreck. While on them I was diagnosed as having Bipolar disorder but those meds kept me that way.

The only thing I'm on is klonipin. I've been on it for years and it helps. But that's through my PCP due to my fast heartbeat.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/13/2012 12:29PM by Lost Mystic.