This experience was one of my first posts here around 3 years ago. It actually got me off on the wrong foot with a poster or two, but really, it's quite amusing if you understand the circumstances.

I lived in Provo back in the late 90's. I had just finished my first year at BYU and was staying the summer because I (foolishly) thought I wanted to start my adult life there.

For the background, let me just say, when I was younger I had quite the mouth and attitude. It still comes out on occasion when I am extremely perturbed and pissed. Fuck, bitch, asshole, C_, were part of my everyday vocabulary; I blame this on my TBM mom who would freak out if the word butt was uttered or even bitch under the appropiate terminology.

I was a regular at the Provo Denny's after 10:00 PM; A place that you had no choice to go if you were under 21 and were sick of dealing with a bunch of Molly or Peter roomies. I met a lot of the Utah counter-culture people and am still friends with many to this day. One lovely evening I was hanging out in one of the booths with a male friend and blathering my typical witty rants about societal norms sprinkled with "fuck" and "bullshit."

Suddenly, a clean cut guy turns around and self-rightously interrupts my conversation.
"Excuse me, but I'm a UTAH MORMON and you're offending me. Could you please stop using fuck so much?"

Irritated, I cheekily replied, "Oh, YEAH?!? Well, I'm, a Colorado Pagan and I don't give a FUCK who or what offends you!"
He and his party left shortly there after. I'm sure he had a fun time testifying at the decaying moral of society the next F&T meeting.

I'll share an even more charming one next round. ;)



Edited 3 time(s). Last edit at 03/10/2012 12:37AM by Itzpapalotl.

My college room mate asked me to stop swearing so much since I was offending God. Basically, I said 'damn' and 'O God' occasionally.I was not swearing like a drunken sailor or even using particularly bad language.

(He wrote the Miracle of unForgiveness, right) an abusive, diseased, donky's nether regions. (Yes, those were my precise words. I like to insult creatively.)

She was furious that I dared to malign such a wonderful human being.

As for your use of "bad" words...I do not think there are really bad words. One word is the same as another, a vocal expression of a thought.

However, when in a public place, it is usually good manners to keep your conversation in "tone" with the sort of place that you are in. That means not only the words that you use, but the volume as well. It is just treating others as you would wish to be treated.

If I find myself as a restaurant (for example) where someone is loud, I usually just find myself another place to sit. Some people are loud because they are hard of hearing, some because they seek attention, some because they have had a drink or two.

I wish that I could say that I am always a nice and polite person, but alas, that is not the case as sometimes I can get "hot under the collar" and let off a stream of words that can blister paint!

I can see how the word FUCK could bother a UTAH MORMON as they get to do so little of it,, that is if they are living the WORD!

Manners really aren't the norm there, lol.

Just for the record, I've mellowed out quit a bit over the last 10 years. I was raised with proper manners and etiquette and I suppose I was doing the rebelling thing against that as well.

But, yes, I can still blister paint if necessary.

I graduated from BYU, worked for a few years, then decided to go back to BYU for my masters. The first class I took was a graduate biochemistry laboratory. My lab partner was a nonmember woman from Califronia who, like me, for some inexplicable reason decided BYU would be a great place to go for grad school.

Since I'd been away from BYU for a while I'd lost my ability to censor my language. My lab partner was never afflicted with such a disability. Needless to say, following our inevitable errors and mistakes we'd both let loose with shit, damn, son of a bitch, etc.

I'm surprised we didn't give the other zoobies whiplash. We'd swear and everyone in the room would whip their heads around to stare at us. And most of the time my partner and I wouldn't have even realized we were swearing.

And the funny thing was the teacher got a kick out of the whole thing. We'd swear, the room would go quiet, and then I'd notice the teacher sitting at his desk trying not to laugh. And on a side note, my lab partner and I finished the course with the highest grades in the class.

I offended by husband's TBM kids simply by existing... and having two beers in my refrigerator. I offended by husband's TBM ex wife by setting boundaries and giving her ex husband a better life when she wanted to force him to "rock bottom".

There's a Mormon woman I know online who gets annoyed whenever I point out anything weird about her religion on a message board we both frequent. She got upset with me once because I used the term "garmies". Apparently, that was disrespectful because temple garments are sacred to her. It doesn't matter to her that her garments don't mean a damn thing to me... or that I think any group that tells you what kind of underwear to wear is very controlling. This same woman refuses to understand that Mormonism can and does tear families apart if someone in a family doesn't believe.

I too SO offended my hubby's TBM ex-wife by marrying him. In looking back when we first got together she called me a "bimbo" which I thought was hilarious and I just shrugged it off. Later, every single time WE had to deal with her usually at visitation handoff, she would completely go off - yelling and screaming at my hubby on the phone in front of the daugther, and would generally make the whole event a nightmare - every single time! She would never get out of her car and yell in front of me - I'm sure she wanted to look like she had it all together, the perfect Mo. She was just such a joy to deal with . . . :-)

Knotheadusc - email me sometime and we'll exchange stores . . . lisa(dot)olby(at)yahoo(dot)com.

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/10/2012 04:02PM by karin.

while I do not believe in the church nor necessarily evenlike Mormons your use of language reflects mor no you than on anyone else. you are sick

Again, I explained this is how I was after breaking free from TSCC. I was a loud-mouthed, fuck-the-consequences, in-your-face young adult.

I didn't care if I offended people because I was tired of living by other people's rules, so I went by my own. You don't know me nor do you know my circumstances growing up in TSCC while many of the other posters here do. There are always going to be people offended by my choices, opinions, ideas, and lifestyle even if I put on polite airs.

Cussing is fun, it relieves stress, and it can be quite amusing. There is also a time and place for it; a lesson that I learned over the years.

Don't be such a ninny. Words only have as much power as you give them.

I'd say your judgmentalism and poor spelling or inept use of the keyboard shows that you are much sicker... go take your meds, they're wearing off, and find someplace else to judge people, Bishop... on second thought why don't you just go choke the Bishop instead, it might help you get rid of that nasty trembling-typo-generating hand of yours.

WOW!!
A live demonstration of OP's point!
I LOVE it!

Okay, I feel kinda bad about this one, but telling this helps me get it off my chest. No actual cussing was involved.

My dear TBM mother was talking about a new temple being constructed near where she lives. She was hoping to be able to go visit it during the brief period when it would be open to the public, before it's consecrated.

Now, she knows I want absolutely nothing to do with the church, and that I am quite outraged that they have recently decided to deny her a temple recommend because, although she paid tithing religiously for probably 30 years and donated countless hours in countless "callings" for the church, she does not pay tithing now... She is supported by of us kids plus her meagre pensions, but still can't really afford tithing out of that. A good deal of her money goes towards medications stuff not covered by insurance because she has extensive health problems. She presented this information to the Temple Recommend Gatekeepers. Their answer? Pay your tithing, and the Lord/Church will look after your needs. She, and we, aren't ready to turn over shopping for critical medicines, personal care items, special diet etc. over to Church members, who barely find time to even visit or even phone her now that she's too sick to actually come to church most of the time. We're surprised at how little we see them. They also hinted that she should somehow get the money from her kids (inactive Mormons, one of us ex-communicated for the crime co-habiting with the mother of his child without marrying her... they were 17 and 18!)... even if we could afford that, wouldn't that be considered tithable income, too? And why should we be obligated to pay to a Church we don't want to support? To basically buy her entrance into the temple? This is just one of the things about Mormonism that makes my head spin.

So one day she suggested that I could perhaps go with her to check out the new temple. I said, "Are you kidding? Why would I want to even go near a building that wouldn't see *you*, an exemplary member of the Church, as worthy to enter there? I'd just as soon drop a bomb on it."

Well. Let's just say that did not go over well. I was quick to clarify that I was joking, and that even if I did harbour impulses to bomb that tacky building it *certainly wouldn't be when there are people in it*! I wouldn't want to hurt actual people! Truly, I am a non-violent person not prone to bombing anything...Anyway, she should know my sense of humour by now, but I wish I could replay that conversation if only for her sake. I love her like there's no tomorrow. I just can't stomach the thought of an institution that declares a devout, poor, sick widow unworthy to enter their doors because she can't afford to pay tithing. My (admittedly ill-considered) joke was born out of a frustration I imagine JC himself must have felt when he got pissed off enough to give hell to the money lenders outside of the temple. Anyone remember that?

This may be off the subject...IMO, your mother should ask to meet with her Bishop. Have ONE tithing check (for the month) in hand made out to the ward . She should show it to him and tell him she has decided to pay tithing from now on but that she is asking that the church help her pay for her neccessities. She should hand the bishop COPIES of all the bills she owes each month and ask how the church can help her...all the while holding the tithing check. She should make it clear that NOONE in her family can or will help her so she is turning to the church. [I was told that only if I took my abusive exil ex back...then the church MIGHT help me financially]. They don't care about her, they want her money...if they cared, they would buy her medicine and other things she needs even if her tithing was $10 and her charity from the church was $200. That would be the right thing to do! Oh sorry this sin't the true church...still trying to heal from this new knowledge. Please forgive me!

During my freshman year at BYU I was at a football game with a friend from the dorms. There was an interception or fumble where BYU lost the ball and we both said "ah shit" and this girl sitting in front of us turns around and says "can you stop swearing, it offends me and those around me." So my friend and I look at each other and burst out laughing.

Had some girl behind me at the supermarket make a rotten remark about the beer I was buying, I looked at her cart that was full of bottles of Robitussin,and soft drinks. I smiled and said either everyone is sick at your place or you are going to have a real fun time, either way be safe and stay well,

Funny, but the first time I'd ever posted on this board (a little over a year ago) was after having offended a Mormon too--not to mention also offending her atheist husband who informed me that "joking about a Mormon's faith is just like joking about a black person's skin color"...uh...riiight. (And no, he is not black.) My Mormon friend and I actually had been making jokes for months about *both* of our religious backgrounds (mine is Catholic), yet she and her atheist hubby were the ones who ended up offended. I had never complained about any Catholic jokes and in fact made several myself.

Ironically, since becoming a regular reader of this board, I now see that there are aspects of Mormonism more joke-worthy than anything I could have previously have imagined.

I used to be the inventory tech for a cell phone store years ago. The inventory program we were using on the computer was having some problems so the inventory seemed way off even though it really wasn't. I was on the phone with the tech from the other store, who was major TBM. I said, "I can't understand how this program got so completely f*cked up." He was really quiet for a few seconds and then he burst out laughing. My co-workers and I swore quite a bit at that particular store so I guess I wasn't thinking. Aaahh, I was young.

Fifty eight years ago, I was born to a mormon couple.
I've been offending them ever since.

MORmONS reserve the right to themselves to dictate what is offensive and what is not. they do it so they can be better than other ppl. LDS get hysterical over nearly meaningless slang while they violate Xtian conventions, that they claim they love, with the most outrageous types of blashempy & profanity.

If I had my way, I would make it against the law for any MORmON business executive to have the official title of "apostle" and "special witness of Jesus Christ", Unless or Until the fucking asshole had been nailed to a cross for while to really contemplate about what they want to do with such a title.
I am betting the ranks of the top MORmON leadership would thin out very quickly.


I would also heartily encourage others to refer them as ASSpostHOLES instead of apostle.

I haven't been out of morg long enough (x2) years to have "offended" anyone yet, but I couldn't help but comment on your experience. I too was at Provo Denny's a lot in the early 90's. Like you, I found it to be a nice break from mormondumb. I understand what your saying. My mother was the exact same way, but I have a different take on it. I try to pull everything good out of my experience of mormondumb that I can. For instance, I agree no smoking due to the health consequences. It doesn't take a genious to know that. No hard liquor, but I'll drink wine and marq's in moderation. I can say that I learned how to be professional in my language from my uptight mormon mother. Now that I'm in a highly successful career working around other non-mormon professionals, I see value in an upbringing that taught me to watch my language in certain situations. Although I can cuss like a sailer if I want (i.e. on a hunting trip with the boyz, etc), I only do so in certain situations. I don't cuss in public places in ear shot of others who would find the language disrespectful. Not trying to be a prude, but just giving a different perspective.

Once when we were dating I sad "dang" and Mrs Mittens-to-be almost fainted.

Ha-ha-ha-ha Mia!

Yeah, I offend my Mormon neighbors just by my mere existence.

I also like to put my garbage cans out on the street on Sunday, after cleaning out my house and yard. I don't answer my door or phone to them--and they know I'm home. It rankles them to know my children and I have "prospered in the land." We don't flaunt it. It is the Mormons who make comments about our minor home improvements and the new cars in the driveway. They have the nerve to ask my kids if they own or lease the cars! Nosy! My kids enjoy the opportunity to brag, though, and it makes them feel good. Many of the Mormon neighbor kids have had drug problems, even into adulthood, and many are still dependent on their parents. It upsets the Mormons' fixed world view, to see non-Mormons from a "broken home" doing well and being happy.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/11/2012 03:12PM by forestpal.

I think my former mormon friends are baffled that I am still alive, flourishing, and un-possessed by an evil spirit.

The best way I have found to truly "offend" a mormon is to walk up to them, with an extremely friendly demeanor, hug them, and talk in a spiritual mormonlike voice and say, "I just want you to know that I pray for you, and hope that someday you will find the truth about the church, well gotta run chow."

When I was younger my TMB family liked this funny song off of Dr Demento. It had a lot of beeps in it that my TBM aunt and her family found highly offensive. Ironically ten years later they are the ones posting the "n" word all over Facebook (because Obama is the anti-christ afterall) and claiming that words are only words. I sent a message to my cousin saying he was "fucking hypocritical." He didn't like that much.

To get to the Downhill and Super G events at Snowbasin you had to take a bus from a parking lot. I was sitting on the bus with my never Mo alpine race coach friend, originally from Minnesota. I had been out of the cult for of 25 years.

My friend was on his cell phone talking to another bachelor coach and asking about the previous evening. He was joking with him and asked, "Did you get laid?" and then chuckled. That was it. No F-bombs, nothing. When the bus stopped, the husband of a Mo couple, by all appearances, turned and said to my friend, "We don't appreciate your filthy language" and left. My friend was truly hurt. He said, "What did I say?" He would have apologized. He is the nicest guy. He would never intentionally hurt anyone. He coaches kids.

I was enraged. I took after the couple. I said, "Why don't you go f*ck yourself, you piece of sh%t? Stay in your house if you can't deal with it!"

I wonder if he ever did it again.



Edited 3 time(s). Last edit at 03/11/2012 04:11PM by No Mo.

Every time I say damn it! my TBM husband get offended. Seriously? I mean I swear ocasionally with real words that we know well but, the word damn! Are you seriously? Why is so hard for them to accept people the way they are? Without critize them it try to control their freedom to express themselves? Unbelievable My advice: ." Do not married a Mormon spouse. It could turn your life in hell !! "

without even trying? Just being yourself, saying and doing everyday things? I can't think of one.

She weighed about 400 pounds, was over 50, a celebrity-mormon inspired convert, never married and still lived with her mother and she was going on and on about expecting teenagers to control themselves and remain abstinent. I merely pointed out how unrealistic and hypocritical it was to expect self-control in hormone driven children when she herself had her own powerlessness against the urges inspired by..... the refrigerator.

This thread reminds me of an old lady I [unfortunately] knew back when I was first married, in the 70's. Our RS often had people teach us that when we heard cussing ANYWHERE, we should squeal and harumph and act offended and tell the person how offended we were, because...well, because we were delicate Mormon ladies, I guess. My TBM husband and I [TBM also at the time] were in a grocery store line very late at night and this old church lady was ahead of us. Ahead of her were several intoxicated young men on a beer run, and one of them said some sort of cuss word...of course, she did the loud offended act and she was lucky they didn't beat her up in the parking lot. They were rude to her [I was smart enough to ignore them] and we were worried for her safety.

The RS leaders were self-righteous prig IDIOTS and telling old ladies to behave like that was really dumb.

I also knew a nice family who wouldn't even watch PG movies because THERE WERE CUSS WORDS in them...not the F word, just stuff like damn or hell. Good grief, all those people could see was old Disney crud and cartoons.

By the way, I cuss like a sailor. My TBM husband does too, when he is mad. Cuss WORDS don't hurt people unless they decide to "take offense".

When I was in the MTC back in the early 90s, I had to go to the mall to get my glasses replaced. I went with my companion and two other sisters on P-day, who also needed something. The MTC was killing me with all it's rules and regulations but I honestly didn't know I couldn't pick up a six pack of Dr. Pepper at the mall and take it back to the MTC with me. I'd always grown up in CA drinking Coke, Pepsi, Dr. Pepper and no Mormon had ever batted an eye about it.

So I'm walking down the mall, carrying a 6-pack, with my nametag and everything and some bee-yotch comes up to me and says "Your taking Dr. Pepper back to the MTC?" in her most horrified Mormon voice. I just laughed and said "Yep, smuggling it in." Because I honestly didn't realize she was seriously offended by the site of me and my Dr. P. It wasn't til later when two of the other sisters with me told me she was really upset that I realized there was a problem.

But I did enjoy the Dr. Pepper.