Okay - yes, I know it's a CHOICE. No one is making me do it. But for the sake of fragile feelings I am choosing to wear them. Once again. I've been out and garment-free for 4 years. My parents know and are sad, but accepting. My brother, sister and all of the other relatives have no idea. I planned on telling them last year, but then my dad got lung cancer - bad prognosis. Each time I've wanted to tell them, the timing's been bad. I don't want to take the focus away from him - peace in the family. Also - leaving (although better in the end) SUCKS at first. It's horrible having your little cozy cuckoon shattered. I don't want to open that door just yet for my sister and brother.

So out of love, I'll put on the show, and wear 'em so no one will worry / wonder. I HATE HATE HATE garments!!!!! Yuck.
I hate the lies and manipulation of the mormon church.

After 4 year??? Ugh, I would never do such a thing. Why not a white tee-shirt if you must do it for show?

Wear a white t-shirt garment top. I know the obvious guy smiley won't be smiling, but that's ok. My dad didn't know they made a G top t-shirt style in cotton. He thought they only had the mesh smiley kind. I pulled my shirt up and showed him the symbols and that shut him up. Anyway, wear one of those on your northern hemisphere and wear boxer briefs on your southern hemisphere. They provide a nice G leg line for the curious lookers and feeler ups. Tuck the top into your pants to avoid a plumber crack give away and nobody will even know what your underwear looks like. If for some reason you get strip searched or caught with your pants down... You can tell them you have a nasty case of jock itch and your doctor recommended normal under wear so your testicles don't fall off.

That should work...

I have worn a garment top with boxer bottoms many times just because the tops are long-living.
I used to tell my wife, "Hey honey, I'm mixing and matching!"

"My undies aren't secret . . . they're eclectic"

Yeah, I guess I could wear a white t shirt, but either way, it's something else "under my clothes" and the white t-shirt wouldn't have the stupid little frilly tell-tale garment lining around the sleeve and neck line. Oh, and of course, can't have panty lines! Gotta have the elegant horizontal lines just above my knee, too.

I really want this to be the last time, but I think my dad may pass away soon (very sad) and then it will be his funeral, which will be even worse timing.

I suppose at some point I've just gotta do it - there's never going to be a "good" time, but now's been particularly bad.

Thanks for responding - I needed to vent my aggravation to someone and I know people on this board get it!! -Sigh --

Also, if you're worried about the panty lines, you could always wear a thong. :D

Why why why do you think you should "protect" people from their own beliefs? You don't owe anyone an explanation or have to engage them at all because you're not doing anything shameful or wrong. Why not just wear what you're comfortable in and if they say anything just smirk and say you're there for your father if they'd like to have a personal discussion about your underwear it can happen at a later date. Or you can just give them a really creepy look and say, "If you show me yours, I'll show you mine!"

So glad I never bothered getting my endowments. What a load of sh** being told what underwear to wear. I always found them gross.

V.

Can you wear something that wouldn't reveal whether or not you are wearing garments?

Sorry to hear about your dad. ((((i fin's dad)))))

OK... look at it from this angle. Why should anyone care what undies you have on? Why not just not bother and materafactly explain when they ask or ask why they care about what clothing of yourse gets skidmarks?

LOL!

I really think if you wear thick, opaque material, it is almost winter, that no one will notice. After all your underwear is hardly going to be the main thing on their minds.

If your parents know, I would bet your siblings already know. Maybe they just haven't confronted you on it. Would your parents not have let something slip somewhere along the way during the last 4 years? If they truly don't know, and if they physically examine you close enough to notice that you're not wearing them, and then have the nerve to comment on it, I would just be prepared with a non-commital answer/response. Don't let them affect your decisions and make you uncomfortable. You don't have to let anything develop into a big deal. If anything comes up, just shrug it off or change the subject. Or just tell them that given the situation, it's not the right time to have such a discussion and that you'll talk to them about it another time.

Rowell Back wrote:

Wear a white t-shirt garment top. I know the obvious guy smiley won't be smiling, but that's ok. My dad didn't know they made a G top t-shirt style in cotton. He thought they only had the mesh smiley kind. I pulled my shirt up and showed him the symbols and that shut him up. Anyway, wear one of those on your northern hemisphere and wear boxer briefs on your southern hemisphere. They provide a nice G leg line for the curious lookers and feeler ups. Tuck the top into your pants to avoid a plumber crack give away and nobody will even know what your underwear looks like. If for some reason you get strip searched or caught with your pants down... You can tell them you have a nasty case of jock itch and your doctor recommended normal under wear so your testicles don't fall off.

That should work...

I love it!! Maybe that's why I don't have testicles???? But I do have boobs. Hmm, I guess I should have made my post more clear in the beginning that I'm a gal. So I guess the guy's t-shirt with a bra OVER it, tucked OVER boxer briefs, but INTO my pants should work? It would definitely make people wonder?? I used to love how people in church would say "The gospel is so SIMPLE." HA!

Yeah the gospel is simple! So simple we have to wear under roohs from the 1800's. My brother and I ran into an old ward acquaintance at wal-mart and after exchanging pleasantries she walked off. As we stood there we both realized her Mormon bloomers were showing at least 2 inches past her black dress. My brother says loud enough for her to hear...someone should tell her that her clown panties are about to fall off. She heard him and turned around red faced. She hiked them up and walked away and my brother says to me... How can anyone seriously wear those? Don't they look in he mirror every morning?

Let us know if the relatives take note of your underwear choice and how you feel about the whole situation.

Good luck. I hope it isn't too bad.

that don't "reveal" whether or not your underwear is holy or mundane? Would that be possible? Just a suggestion ... : )

means nothing to you, everything to them. I like it.

If you hate them, don't wear them. You're not a member of the church. Why be untrue to yourself and feed the lies and manipulations of the church?

IMHO, by wearing them - you're suggesting that not being Mormon is shameful.

BINGO: the most powerful attitude that works -- always: " out of love" -- if only we all did more of that in all of our actions and thoughts, especially with those that are still in the LDS Church.

What we do out of love brings the best results!

GOOD FOR YOU.

I sure as hell wouldn't betray myself or who I am by putting on garments. Y

ou might get a mesh shirt and nice dress slacks. Wear some nice jewelry as if you are going out on the town. Show up and let them all stare and talk.

When you wear "normal" everyday attire (that has long sleeves, high neck and a skirt to below the knees), how can anybody possibly tell whether you are wearing garmies or plain old simple panties and a bra?

Do garmies show through a layer of regular street clothes? Or are you required to wear a sign on your shirt that states whether or not you are wearing garmies? I just don't get it.

Please explain this to me.

Just wondering.

We'd all like a good laugh.

Sorry. Couldn't help the bad joke, and didn't want to be mean. But you're probably doing the right thing by it. It is important, after all, to try to help bring peace to a grieving family. I think we can all sacrifice a time or two when need be. Good luck.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/11/2010 04:30PM by cludgie.

You have the advantage, because they will be looking for something that isn't there. (And they WILL look.) If they see no lines above your knees, you might be wearing longer "spanks" or pantie hose. How would they know? Rude Mormons do feel you up. They feel for the little sleeves, and they feel your back for the square neck, and they feel at your waist, too. When I moved to Utah, I just thought Utah Mormons were touchy-feely.

You can buy short-sleeved longer-legged silk underwear in the catalogs--Land's End, Wintersilks, Eddie Bauer, or at REI.

It makes no sense. The Mormons are the rude ones! It is none of their business what underwear you are wearing. Yet--you are so concerned about being polite to them, that you are willing to go through physical and mental discomfort to conform to the weirdness.

So sorry about your dad! It really sucks having to worry about underwear at a time like this, You're right! Peoplehere know what you're talking about. Can you imagine telling a non-mo about this? No wonder the morg keeps this stuff secret.

When I once told my therapist that I had to do something that I didn't want to do, the therapist told me:

The ONLY things that you HAVE to do are eat, drink water, sleep, and go potty. Everything else that you do in your life is optional.

I think that same advice applies to your situation. You do not "HAVE to wear garments." You can choose to wear "normal" underwear. Whatever underwear you have on is absolutely NOBODY'S BUSINESS but your own.

IMNSHO you have created a dilemma for yourself that does not actually exist in the real world.

Just out of curiosity,why do you still have your garments? I know I trashed mine within a week of removing them for the last time. But maybe your situation is more normal than mine,I don't know.

Are you going to be somewhere where you can wear long pants? They make g bottoms now that come to mid-calf, so no one would ever know you aren't wearing garment bottoms as long as you didn't have panty lines showing. They are almost like the pant-liners that you can get at JC Penney's. As for the top, can you just layer instead? That usually does the trick. A cami and sweater are great. No one can tell you aren't wearing a g top (especially if your top is dark).

http://www.gentlemansemporium.com/store/001737.php

Just dye 'em white, and you'll be JUST like Horny Ol' Joe! ;oD

A crew neck sweater over a woven shirt and who can tell? That was back in the days before the 2-piece G's,

Isn’t this the very thing we have learned to hate? Isn’t this Boyd’s teaching? “some truths are not very useful”. Isn’t this the very thinking that many in the church have when it comes to telling anyone the “uncomfortable truths”.


Will you wear clothing that more readily make the garments easily detectable to falsely portray your allegiances? Lie to yourself and your family? Where is personal integrity in this?


I can agree with wearing clothing that makes your underwear choice more “un-detectable” but I completely disagree with lying to yourself and others by deliberate deception to protect others “feelings”.


This is so very basic to the reasons we left!


Being there for love and support is paramount. You’re not there to protect and support others testimonies, are you? And after when you look in the mirror what will you think? I’m so glad I pulled that off! Or, that really sucked and I feel like a putz.

I can understand. I hadn't worn g's for over a year, and finally got the courage to talk to my family, then my sister died in a car wreck in Utah, (another reason that I HATE Utah with a passion). I decided that the timing would just be terrible, so I threw on the g's. There never is a good time, but personally, I'd wait till emotions have calmed down.

Wear enough clothes so it doesn't come up. I'm sure sorry about your dad.

I'm not Mormon, but I'm terribly certain that it's difficult at best to get up the emotional wherewhithal to tell your family something this important under the BEST of circumstances, much less when there is this much stress due to your father's illness. It's probably better for YOU if you tell them eventually, however, because these situations will keep coming up over and over again, and you will dread them over and over again until you handle it. Only you know your own family dynamics, your own emotional strength and the best time to handle it.

on what it teaches about the psychology of Mormonism and its lingering impact on us. My advice? Short shorts, tank top, and no bra. Make the fact you are not wearing Gs unmistakeable.

My recommendation:

Wear them inside-out as a self-controlled rebellion.

Ron