I live in Salt Lake. I go to a nail salon completely staffed with Vietnamese people who do a fantastic job with manicures and pedicures. However, it is unnerving when they chat with each other in their language and I have no idea what the conversation is about. I wonder if they are talking about me.
Does anyone else ever experience this in businesses?
My brother speaks fluent Vietnamese, several dialects. Courtesy of USN, not MTC as he is a nevermo. I'll see if I can get him to check it out; however he is in the habit of clipping his own nails.
I'd think they were rude if they were purposely trying to exclude me from their conversation. But the girl doing my nails clearly didn't understand a word of english, and everything had to be interpreted for her.
I don't mean this to come across badly, but have you considered that you are not that important or interesting to them? They're probably talking about their lives, families, work; the same stuff most people chat about with co-workers.
I remember as a teenager, every time I heard someone laughing in public I immediately thought they were laughing at me. The older I get, the more I realize that most people are too busy thinking about their own lives to pay much attention to me. Even if they are talking about you, so what? You're talking about them behind their backs and I'm sure you would hate to think they might be unnerved by that.
So, in the nicest possible way, I say, get over yourself already.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/27/2011 02:19AM by Pista.
to exclude others from the conversation in this manner. It's a matter of knowing how to behave appropriately in the situation. When you are serving a client, all your attention should be on the client. You should not be having side conversations and ignoring the client, no matter in what language, let alone in a language you can't understand.
If I'm the customer, I don't need to "get over myself". I need to find a different business to patronize, because you've lost mine.
I'm actually inclined to agree with Badgirl here. When waiting on or ringing up a customer, you need to focus on the customer, not having a constant sidebar with your co-workers. It IS rude, unprofessional, and causes mistakes on tickets and purchases. I treat my servers and cashiers with kindness, respect, and politeness and I expect the same from them. I *know* what it's like to deal with jerks all day, but that doesn't give an employee an excuse to act unprofessional.
It's annoying when a cashier is ringing me up and discussing personal matters with another cashier the whole time. People in the service industry are paid to serve the customer, not socialize with coworkers. If you need to talk about a personal matter, you do it in between customers or on your break.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/28/2011 08:26AM by Itzpapalotl.
And sometimes manicurists do talk about customers in their native language, whether it's about some odd thing on the client or if they think she'll be a bad tipper. It's no different than any other service based industry; People talk about customers a good part of the time. It's a way to blow off steam, because, frankly, plenty of customers are assholes.
I don't avoid those places because of that, however; I avoid them because some are cesspools of germs and I've read too may horror stories of mani-pedis gone wrong.
Itzpapalotl Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > And sometimes manicurists do talk about customers > in their native language, whether it's about some > odd thing on the client or if they think she'll be > a bad tipper. It's no different than any other > service based industry; People talk about > customers a good part of the time. It's a way to > blow off steam, because, frankly, plenty of > customers are assholes. > > I don't avoid those places because of that, > however; I avoid them because some are cesspools > of germs and I've read too may horror stories of > mani-pedis gone wrong.
One of the same reasons I avoid them, too. I have yet to ever see a place properly sanitize a pedi tub. They need to be cleaned and flushed out each time, and then having never seen a place actually do that, makes me gag at the thought of getting a pedi in one of those. The gray water with icky leftover foot gunk in it I've seen when flushing the jets, yeah, pass! I don't want that blowing into my supposedly clean water once they run the jets that aren't flushed when I'm using the pedi tub. D:
Some customers are total assholes, and at times I'm dying to go back in the dispensary and vent my head off about them and can't wait for my chance (I'm a hair colorist, it gives me time in the dispensary mixing color and other things so I get to step away for a few and vent). But in front of a client? No way. Save it for somewhere more private.
I was worried when the always busy salon only accepted cash. Then I contracted a toe fungus from their pedicure. Insurance didn't cover the $400 medicine. Two toenail surgeries on my big toe (first one removed the entire nail that had flipped up and was digging into my toe, second was a vertical section removed...)
Do not get a pedicure. Any dermatologist will give you the same advice. You can get sepsis, all sorts of infections.
If you think workers don't talk about customers--I type medical records. You BET the doctors talk about the patients . . . and don't often think about the fact they have the dictation system on.
In fact, I've had doctors talk about their bosses. One doctor talked about what he'd do to the next woman he went out with in explicit terms (and promptly called the office and asked us to please just delete the dictation without listening). I had one doctor say, "Isn't that the ugliest baby you've ever seen" to the nurse.
If you think they aren't talking about you a lot of the time, you would be wrong.
...for Vietnamese-run nail salons. We have several around here, and I used to frequent one in New York many years ago. Some days the nail technicians are relatively quiet, and some days they are chatting away. I don't worry about it.
LOL!!! That video was hilarious...and yes it does explain it all.
The Seinfeld episode with Elaine getting her nails done was funny too. She had George's dad come with her to the nail salon to see what they were saying about her because she just -knew- they were making fun of her. (George's dad had learned Korean during the war ) It turned out that they had been talking about her and calling her "Princess" because they thought she was a pain in the a$$. Until that episode I thought I was the only one that was paranoid about what the nail girls are saying :)
The guy that does mine for the past 5 years(he is awesome)explained to me that when Americans talk to them they have to convert most of the words into vietnamese then think of a response and then convert it back to english.
He always apologizes when he is conversing with the others. He is the owner so he has to run things why he works.
Most of the time it seems they are talking about there lives kids, trip, and family still in vietnam. I found if I ask him about his country he loves to tell me about it. But I have3 to be patient so he can find the words.
But when they get a picky or rude client I can also tell they are talking about them. Like someone mentioned I am sure it goes on everywhere.
That episode of Seinfeld was so funny.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/27/2011 01:49PM by beansandbrews.
It happens to me at my nail salon too. I love this place, it is run very efficiently...rarely a wait....but they talk constantly to each other in their language....Cambodian, Vietnamese, whatever they are. It is just rude. I am not at all enamoured by their language either.....so strange. I think all of them should consider their clientele more. I even thought of leaving and going elsewhere, but this place a pretty cheap.
I submit for your consideration that it has become part of the nail salon 'experience' to have the ladies chattering away in Vietnamese, so that customers can happily complain to friends and family.
Here in SoCal, I often get to have fun with the reverse. I'll be in line at the bank behind or next to Hispanics who are loudly chattering away in Spanish, and when I get to the window, I'll tell the gringo cashier, "Boy, they were going on and on about your hair!" Of course, they weren't.
In a perfect world they would be fluent in English as well as Vietnamese and so would you. When you are around Spanish speakers, do you change to Spanish? When you are in Europe, did you ever sit there and talk in English when you were around Italian speakers? Good grief, quit worrying about things like this!
Seinfeld had an episode on Elaine going to a Korean shop -------- they were making fun of her.
But that was an episode on Seinfeld.
I think it is pretty rude to speak a foreign language in that type of shop and wouldn't support them normally ------ but hey this is America, called a 'melting pot' but really not.
If I were working on a patient, client, customer, etc., I would not be talking to someone else in a conversation that does not include the person I'm serving- English or not.
When they do this, it gives the person the feeling they are a piece of meat. I would think this could impact my tips and referral base if I did that.
I'm not the type who would go to a place like that (I'm not into decorative Lady Talons) but I would wonder if their quality of service is as low as their customer service.
One Christmas vacation I was working as a sales assoc. for a major dept. store. The two much younger associates across the aisle in the next area were Hispanic women and didn't know I could understand their lingua. They would often make fun of customers walking down the aisle but the day they made remarks about how well hung the men were was the day I broke out laughing and suggested, in Spanish, that they might want to be careful. Some of us gringos y gringas understand every word!
As far as the post, I am really intimidated by the mani-pedi shops - cleanliness and being surrounded by people who don't talk to me but in their own language is a really unnerving thought. I have never had a mani or pedi!
I was in Costco and following behind two women and their two young daughters. The women were talking in spanish, and the little girls were talking in english.
Turns out the women were saying some pretty crappy things about me. There was no reason for it, but I thought it was funny that their kids were translating for me.
My hubby isn't hispanic, but looks like he is. He came walking around the corner and I enthusiastically said "Hola!"
The women both grabbed their kids and left the store, leaving their carts full of unpurchased items.
It was pretty funny. DH wanted to know why I was using the only word I know of spanish, since he doesn't speak spanish either.
So learn Vietnamese and find out. It's their native language. It's not "rude" of them to talk in their native language, especially if their English isn't very good. Learn to be accepting of people who aren't just like you -- it's not that hard. Let them be themselves without being "offended" by it.
Gossip is a way of life it seems everywhere. And being the "subject" of someone's gossip is worrisome because you may feel like you are being judged. It has happened to me 1,000 times in life and there is no way to control others or change people. The worst place for gossip is the LDS church. Next, the office. Third, probably the family. Fourth, neighbors and friends. Fifth, every one else. Since I worked in Saks Fifth Avenue Beauty Salon 33 years ago, I can confirm that gossip is rampant among everyone. The people who are most gossiped about are the nasty, bigoted, conceited, stingy customers. It's a study in human behavior for sure. Workers in this industry are like slaves, i.e., they work really long hours, doing very difficult work, are unappreciated, must try to please people, and have to put up with some awful, miserable people. Their conversations may be a part of their therapy to get past the inhumane work environment and abject poverty they are stuck in. Oftentimes, the manicurist has little education, and poor social training in manners. Could you try being kind to her next time you go in for some services? Ask her about herself or figure out a way to communicate to make the experience more pleasant for the both of you. If that doesn't work, try switching to a salon with English speaking staff. Good luck!
I would also like to add that it is REALLY difficult to go to another country, which has a significantly different language, and get beyond the initial greetings/thank you/how much is this? stuff and into actual conversation.
As in...it is darn near impossible for awhile.
There is so MUCH you have to learn, and even if your words are "correct," the impression you give can be so unsettlingly WRONG.
For me, it was being very sharply told to STOP saying "Thank you" (todah...or todah rabah), when servers put things down beside me (even when, as a vegetarian, I was asking for something which was, in some way, "special service").
I was told that, although my Hebrew was okay, I was SO AMERICAN in the way I used it that it was upsetting to the people around me, because it was the server's JOB to put things down beside me, and I should NOT be thanking them every time (and once was barely acceptable)! (In effect: I was imposing my American values on a culture which was not American, and it was being felt as an unwanted and intrusive kind of cultural imperialism.)
When I have been in foreign countries, I have always spoken English to the Americans I was with, and it never occurred to me that anyone would take offense, since neither I, nor my companions, possessed the language skills in ANY language to just casually chat in whatever was the appropriate language for that area.
So I have done myself what is bothering you...but I was NEVER gossiping about ANYONE!!! Not ever!!!
Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 08/03/2015 02:20AM by tevai.