Posted by:
afraid of mormons
(
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Date: January 13, 2018 02:15PM
Well, you could train yourself, like the missionaries have been trained. You can read assertiveness-training books, such as "When I Say No I Feel Guilty," and "Assertiveness Training for Women" (which also applies to men). In the books are specific dialogs to memorize and rehearse. There are generalized techniques on how to get rid of manipulators and stalkers.
Also, in observing the missionaries' behavior, you might have picked up on some of these well-practiced techniques. Being "assertive but not aggressive" is a way to be "not always polite but humane," as you say.
My favorite technique is the common "broken record" technique. Just say "no" over and over and over and over again. I have had to say "no" probably on the average of 10 times per brief conversation with Mormons.
"No." (Do not water it down with "no, thank you" or with any excuse or explanation, whatsoever!)
"No, I won't talk to you."
"No, I am not interested"
"No, I won't do that"
"No, I will not."
"No, I won't open the door" (my personal favorite reply, yelled through the closed door.)
"No, Go away."
"No, Leave us alone."
Even, "No solicitors" opens things up for discussion. "We are not soliciting, we are here to help you...." Then, you reply, "You are soliciting for our tithing money...." This is now a conversation. As you well know. It does no good to try to carry on a reasonable conversation with a missionary.
The "No" messages are not rude, because they are "I" messages. You have a right to not talk, to not open your door, to keep walking to where you are headed. What would be rude, and a waste of time and breath, would be "you" messages, and accusations. For example, "Your church is fake." Missionaries expect this, and have a counter argument for every possible accusation. The missionaries will turn it into a debate or a testimony-bearing. It is the only True Church on the face of the Earth, founded by a True Prophet of God bla-bla, and there you are, stuck again, listening to missionary lies.
I don't understand why people want to be "humane" to missionaries, who disrespect your human rights. They tell LIES. They stalk your CHILDREN. They want to con you our of your money. They will accuse you of being less righteous. They will separate children from their parents, and undermine parental authority in favor of "God's authority." They will not hesitate to turn your spouse against you and break up your family. Mormon missionaries are far more deleterious than mere "trespassers."
You have come to your own conclusion.
"They’re used to wanting to get the upper hand in any interaction and I want to do my best to not give it to them."
Simply, set your personal boundaries. My boundaries are to not respond to missionaries, and to keep them away from my family.
Do not feed
Do not make eye contact
Run away