after The funeral, when the family retreats to one stake center and the Holiest of quorums retreats to another...who will bring what to the potluck lunch at these various ‘sanctuaries’?

Let’s assume each in the Q15, mourning though they are, bring a dish. What do they bring or have their wives prepare to bring?

Bednar - pickles
Oaks - meatballs
Packer - ghost cookies
Nelson- the ham
Ballard- green bean casserole
Holland- jowel something or other
Eyering- milk, but spills it
Ughdorf- sellout funeral taters. Nothing that could be construed as being German.

Who brings the green jello with ham and fruit loops?

What do the others in the goon squad bring?

I think Bednar gets the Jello but then I would have given Packer the jerky meat.

Eyering would cry his salty crocodile tears into the milk....

I thought Nelson brought donuts that one of his wives made...?

The green jello with ham and fruit loops???? Is that real ?



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/09/2018 07:11PM by saucie.

I think it's supposed to be green jello with grated carrots in it.
Yuck !

Hey, that's the best thing about a mormon funeral--the funeral taters. I love those things. I'm sure they call out the best Lion House chef to make them for the funeral of the holyprofitofgawd.

But between my postmenopausal metabolism and the fact that if I made them for myself I'd eat the whole pan, I have only made them once in the past 10 years. It was for a potluck so I knew I'd only have one scoop. Don't have that kind of moolah for a new wardrobe.

I've been to 4 funerals in the last couple of years, mostly old relatives of mine. I usually go with my sister-in-law since she's retired also and she's better company than her husband. He hates funerals so tries to get out of them. We don't usually stay for the luncheon.

Our nephew died in August 2016, IIRC, and we were seeing relatives that we hadn't seen in a while, so we decided to stay for the luncheon. There was no cemetery visit since he was cremated and I don't know what they decided to do with his remains.

And I was so disappointed that the funeral potatoes weren't anything like the ones I was looking forward to. Kind of watery and flat tasting. Maybe the next one.

Actually, the best funeral potatoes I ever had were baptism potatoes. I went to Virginia for the (Methodist) baptism of my oldest granddaughter. Who was 2 months old...gasp! My daughter's MIL did a luncheon afterwards and the potatoes were to die for. However, she had no idea why my daughter and I called them funeral potatoes. I was afraid I'd offended her so I told her that from now on, when I had any THAT good, they would be elevated to baptism potatoes. But I haven't had any. They had add-ins that I can't duplicate.

Good old ‘jowls something or other.’ One of my favorite funeral dishes.

I was trying to think of some characteristic or something form a talk that would fit in with each aposthole.

Bednar and his pickle talk
Oaks as his head reminds me of a pasty white meatball. White as it is nothing but filler — bread crumbs, if you will.

Nelson should have been doughnuts. Good catch on that one.

Packer, since he has passed “Cookies and a Kiss” would need to be ghostly

Holland’s jowls make me laugh. Maybe roasted dodo would be more appropriate

Eyering, the joke was crying over spilled milk

Uajiewfghdorf could have been a German potatoe salad or something delicious from the Father Land, but he would just sell out to the pre-fab Mormon culture

Ballard is bland and unmemorable.

Quenton Cook could bring everyone hits of iocain powder. That would help his ranking during this shuffle. He seems to resemble Wallace Shawn.

Neil Andersen — KitKat bars, so everyone could give Bro Joe a break by giving him a piece of the KitKat bar.


I have no idea about the other apostholes.

As I don't come from a long historical Mo background, I go online for Funeral Taters recipes and I like to add ingredients to the basic tasty casserole. My favorite add-ins are an extra dose of pre-cooked chopped onion, and canned mild green chilies. I purchase the canned whole chilies, rinse and remove seeds and burned skin before chopping. I've found hard seeds in the pre-chopped ones.

Also, sometimes I use Tatter Tots in the casserole. I bake them until they are brown and crispy before stirring in the other ingredients. I call this "Napoleon Dynamite" funeral potatoes.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/17/2018 07:48AM by desertwoman.

Very creative. I'd write a reply, but I don't know any of the big time celebrity priesthood guys.