Posted by:
Anziano Young
(
)
Date: January 05, 2018 10:57PM
Based on the current lineup of the Q13, we can prognosticate who will make it to the top job--and who won't--over the next decade or three. We should start a pool! Here's my guess:
Nelson: At 93, he won't be president for much more than a couple years at most. I'm betting he'll last less than a year, paving the way for...
Oaks: Currently 85, Oaks could last several years after he ascends to the presidency, barring unforeseen illness. Which means...
Ballard: 89, won't outlive Oaks. Denied!
Holland: 8 years Oaks' junior (77 now), Holland will be the next Profit after Oaks, but I don't expect him to last long--all that extra weight and general jowliness don't bode well for his long-term health. During his tenure...
Eyring: 7 years older than Holland, will kick off without taking over.
Uchtdorf: The same age as Holland, he may or may not reach the presidency depending how early Holland finds the door. I'll give him 50/50, and if he does take over, expect a chorus of "oohs" and "ahs" from the Morgbots for their first non-Anglo Profit.
Bednar: With Holland and/or Uchtdorf out of the way, Bednar--currently 65, 8 years younger than both--will be the next president, and the first in this century to ascend the throne at less than 80 years old. He'll institute a deeply fundamentalist regime in response to world progressiveness, and TSCC will really start hemorrhaging members under his watch. When he pisses his last, 25 years from now or so, is when I'm guessing TSCC will no longer be taken seriously by any world or US leaders as a major religious force.
Cook and Christofferson: Both several years older than Bednar, neither will outlive him.
Anderson, Rasband, Stevenson, Renlund: Anderson and Rasband are both a year older than Bednar; if either makes it, they will have a short reign. Stevenson will be the next profit after Bednar with a years-long tenure, and Renlund, who is older than Stevenson, won't be profit.
There you have it: Nelson (<1 year), Oaks (5-7 years), Holland (3-5 years), Uchtdorf (<1 year), Bednar (10-15 years), Stevenson (3-5 years).
You heard it here first.