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Posted by: dirtbikr ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 11:49AM

Whats your best "one liner" when the opportunity rises to say why you left the morg? Startilating and humourus is what I am shooting for. Sometimes there just isn't the time to explain.

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Posted by: dirtbikr ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 11:50AM


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Posted by: Human ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 11:55AM

Excellent question!

When I first came to RfM, that is exactly what I was looking for, and needed.

There are some great wits here (I’m not one of them, alas). Can’t wait to read their responses.

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Posted by: Devoted Exmo ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 11:57AM

I left because their standards are too low.

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Posted by: itzbeen20 ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 11:57AM


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Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 12:06PM

If they know, or should know that you neither take drugs nor drink heavily, I say, "So I can drink and drive! Because you can't drink and drive if you're a mormon, unless you're in congress."

How about, "Ah, I quit 'cuz none of the almost 15 year olds will even date me, much less marry me."

Or, "I can't explain it! It was big, they were dark..."

"Mormonism left me with too much time on hands! I needed to find a church that would make use of my talents...like thinking for myself and being a good husband right now!"

"Aw, there was no point to me staying mormon, `cuz my wife won't let me have any more wives..."

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Posted by: Human ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 12:12PM

elderolddog Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> "Aw, there was no point to me staying mormon, `cuz
> my wife won't let me have any more wives..."

LOL!

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Posted by: Hockeyrat ( )
Date: November 23, 2017 06:58PM

The church can't hide behind the Internet, ask Mr.google anything .

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Posted by: mannaz ( )
Date: November 27, 2017 11:01PM

To TBM “just not a plan for happiness for my family”
To non-Mormon “... I can’t believe the shit I thought was
‘Normal’....”

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Posted by: lurking in ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 12:06PM

... that would have me as a member."



(Apologies to Groucho Marx)

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Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 12:19PM

"The joke has just gone too far."

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Posted by: Lot's Wife ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 07:10PM

I like that one.

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Posted by: Razortooth ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 02:30PM

After forty years all it took was an open mind, twenty minutes on the internet and five minutes of rational thought.

Half of what the say is lies, and the other half ain't true.

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Posted by: MeM ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 04:58PM

"Danged if I didn't forget to Doubt my Doubts"

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 05:10PM

Knowledge is power. God gave us our minds for a reason. Studying out the truth of a matter is not a negative, it's being proactive.

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Posted by: Aquarius123 ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 06:37PM

I hate the s**t out of that f***ing so called church.
(Simple and to the point.)I do say that.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/21/2017 06:37PM by Aquarius123.

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Posted by: Boballooie0691 ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 06:57PM

The evidence that I've gathered that proves "the church" is not true is stronger than my testimony that got me in there in the first place...

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Posted by: cutekitty ( )
Date: November 23, 2017 10:41AM

Boballooie, Razortooth and VZ Gardener said it all for me.

I would sum it up as:

'JS was a pedophile, amongst other despicable things, and made up the bom from 5 other books.
In the scared name of cheese n' rice. AMEN'

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Posted by: sunbeep ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 07:37PM

Yeah, well, I used to believe that Santa Claus was real too.

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 07:49PM

Santa Claus *is* real!

(I believe.)

But I'm onto the Tooth Fairy.

;)



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/21/2017 07:50PM by Amyjo.

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Posted by: sunnynomo ( )
Date: November 22, 2017 02:15AM

Amyjo - I loved your response!!

My daughter (at age 7) told me "Mom, I'm pretty sure the Easter Bunny isn't real. It just doesn't make any sense. But I know Santa is the real deal!!"

I miss my kids being little sometimes ...

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Posted by: VZ Gardner ( )
Date: November 23, 2017 08:47AM

lurking in Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baptism_for_the_dead
> #Genealogy_and_baptism

While it’s routinely accepted that Joseph Smith, Jr. was an egomaniacal philandering cheat who over-stretched his intellectual legs and got practically every Biblical interpretation wrong, the requirement for proxy baptism was one of his most colossal blunders. Rather than being one of the most merciful/charitable doctrines, it’s easily the most insidiously deceptive one.

Except for keeping many devout Mormons comatosely infatuated with scouring records for names of “damned” ancestors and spawning the erection of obscenely pricey albeit useless edifices that are nothing more than huge multi-million dollar billboards, the notion that a loving Heavenly Father would demand corporeal ceremonies performed by living substitutes before allowing most of his dead children into his Kingdom is a benchmark of gullibility.

Of course, it’s no more absurd than anything else Mormons feel they must do to keep their capricious SkyDaddy™ happy; it’s just so damnably pointless and massively wasteful.

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Posted by: VZ Gardner ( )
Date: November 29, 2017 04:26PM

VZ Gardner Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> lurking in Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> >
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baptism_for_the_dead
>
> > #Genealogy_and_baptism
>
> While it’s routinely accepted that Joseph Smith,
> Jr. was an egomaniacal philandering cheat who
> over-stretched his intellectual legs and got
> practically every Biblical interpretation wrong,
> the requirement for proxy baptism was one of his
> most colossal blunders. Rather than being one of
> the most merciful/charitable doctrines, it’s
> easily the most insidiously deceptive one.
>
> Except for keeping many devout Mormons comatosely
> infatuated with scouring records for names of
> “damned” ancestors and spawning the erection
> of obscenely pricey albeit useless edifices that
> are nothing more than huge multi-million dollar
> billboards, the notion that a loving Heavenly
> Father would demand corporeal ceremonies performed
> by living substitutes before allowing most of his
> dead children into his Kingdom is a benchmark of
> gullibility.
>
> Of course, it’s no more absurd than anything
> else Mormons feel they must do to keep their
> capricious SkyDaddy™ happy; it’s just so
> damnably pointless and massively wasteful.

Damn and blast; they keep deleting my special edit...

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Posted by: caffiend ( )
Date: December 03, 2017 12:46PM


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Posted by: elderpopejoy ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 08:57PM

dirtbikr seeks the:

"Startilating and humourus" one-liner one might deliver when one is asked why one left the morg.

One such could be something like "I left the day Joe's god-in-rut labeled Mihn or Mhin hit on me in the CVS."

That is, as I was perusing the fantastical facsimiles in the Cult's early mystification called BOA.

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Posted by: donbagley ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 09:01PM

I could throw a Book of Mormon into a landfill, and it would be more likely to land on truth than contain it.

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Posted by: Badassadam1 ( )
Date: November 21, 2017 09:14PM

Strength in the boner or health in the naval, works everytime or atleast the one time i did it.

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Posted by: Aquarius123 ( )
Date: November 22, 2017 04:12AM

You win the prize, donbagley!

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Posted by: Afraid Of Mormons ( )
Date: November 22, 2017 04:43AM

My friend always says, "I had a revelation that the church was not true." I love watching the Mormons' response to that: a dumbfounded, open-mouthed look, and no words to reply.

Other real-life answers I've heard:

"I couldn't afford to be a Mormon." (A fairly wealthy man said that.)

"I used to be a Mormon, but I grew a brain."

"I want to follow Christ."

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Posted by: CateS ( )
Date: November 22, 2017 05:43AM

I was offended?

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Posted by: moremany ( )
Date: November 22, 2017 08:20PM

The church just couldn't keep up and so fell behind - WAY behind - its not like I could help it or do anything to save it.

M@t

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Posted by: kathleen ( )
Date: November 23, 2017 05:08AM

Once you see the lies, that genie won’t go back in the bottle.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/23/2017 05:11AM by kathleen.

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Posted by: yorkie ( )
Date: November 23, 2017 10:44AM

I would say that I found out it's not what it claims to be.
Simple answer and leaves the door open for if they want to ask further or just leave it there.

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Posted by: messygoop ( )
Date: November 23, 2017 05:49PM

The grits started to leave a bad taste in my mouth.

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Posted by: dagny ( )
Date: November 23, 2017 06:04PM

I outgrew it.

It was time to add more books to my life.

I found the history and many of the teaching of that religion unacceptable and not anything I want to perpetuate.

I do not want to spend my life in something that is based on faith or emotion. I got tired of checking my brain at the door.

I am a women and have more self respect than to participate in an organization with a male priesthood.

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Posted by: moremany ( )
Date: November 24, 2017 04:17AM

You should be able to stand on a CHurCH (CULTure), not the other way around.

The noose was too tight so I loosed it and immediately saw further, more deeply and clearly.

They couldn't hang so I lost 'em.

M@t

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Posted by: Babyloncansuckit ( )
Date: November 24, 2017 05:33AM

Jesus said, “Man cannot live on shit sandwiches alone”.

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Posted by: Badassadam1 ( )
Date: November 29, 2017 04:58PM

Hahahahaha i had to laugh at that one you crack me up man. I am guilty of coming back on the site while waiting for a doc appt.

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Posted by: ALifeExamined ( )
Date: November 25, 2017 09:21AM

When asked by active Mormons why I left, my one liner is as follows:

"I cared enough about the religious tradition given to me at birth to learn the history and theology underlying that tradition by literally reading hundreds of books and articles and it ultimately was the undoing of my faith."

Of course, what I'm really saying to that person between the lines is, "I cared enough to learn the history and theology and you didn't -- otherwise you'd find yourself in the same place as me." The response is polite, completely accurate and in no way defensive.

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Posted by: koriwhore ( )
Date: November 25, 2017 07:43PM

I couldn't get a straight answer out of a Mormon and I still can't.
They ALWAYS assure me thats not true, right before lying through their teeth and proving me right.
The only way you can defend MORmONdumb is to lie through your teeth theses days.

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Posted by: CANYONPROPHET ( )
Date: November 26, 2017 10:43AM

Cults just aren't my thing.

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Posted by: anon 4 this joke ( )
Date: November 27, 2017 09:15PM

Kinderhook-up

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Posted by: liesarenotuseful ( )
Date: November 27, 2017 09:57PM

It's not for me.

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Posted by: kathleen ( )
Date: November 28, 2017 02:15AM

They're fuckers, and I hate 'em!

:D

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Posted by: Badassadam1 ( )
Date: November 29, 2017 05:01PM

Never seen this side of you kathleen but i like it haha.

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Posted by: PapaKen ( )
Date: November 29, 2017 05:48PM

I was offended BIG TIME when I found out that Joseph Smith lied

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Posted by: BeenThereDunnThatExMo ( )
Date: November 29, 2017 07:47PM

Here's a few that I have used as the situation warranted over the years...

- Which version of the "First Vision" is your favorite?

- I could no longer continue to lower my personal standards to remain a Mormon...why do you?

- When I left Mormonism I had to Up my standards...so Up Yours!!!

Or so it seems to me...

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Posted by: kathleen ( )
Date: December 02, 2017 03:38PM

Mormonism: "Keys" to The Kingdom or burglary tools?

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Posted by: kathleen ( )
Date: December 02, 2017 03:57PM

... answer to be found at Bear's Ears.

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Posted by: moremany ( )
Date: December 03, 2017 02:54PM

kathleen Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> ... answer to be found at Bear's Ears.


I knew it
I knew it
I knew it

M@t

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Posted by: saucie ( )
Date: December 02, 2017 10:16PM

I got tired of being robbed and lied to.

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Posted by: kathleen ( )
Date: December 02, 2017 10:23PM

Saucie, I like yours the best!
May I borrow it around my in laws? :)

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Posted by: saucie ( )
Date: December 02, 2017 10:34PM

kathleen Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Saucie, I like yours the best!
> May I borrow it around my in laws? :)


For Sure Kathleen.

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Posted by: elderolddog ( )
Date: December 02, 2017 10:54PM

Just to be certain, you're referring to the church, right? Not to me....

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Posted by: CA girl ( )
Date: December 03, 2017 12:37AM

Mormons don't ask me.
To non-LDS, I just say "I learned to read." It makes them laugh and then we discuss how great the internet is.

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Posted by: presleynfactsrock ( )
Date: December 03, 2017 12:59AM

Grew tired of saluting.

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Posted by: VZ Gardner ( )
Date: December 04, 2017 10:35AM

presleynfactsrock Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Grew tired of saluting.


Grew tired of being fucked in the ass 24/7...

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Posted by: bobofitz ( )
Date: December 03, 2017 10:24AM

" I looked into it and the story didn't check out"

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Posted by: Felix ( )
Date: December 04, 2017 11:21AM

cesletter.org

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Posted by: Visitors Welcome ( )
Date: December 04, 2017 11:56AM


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Posted by: baura ( )
Date: December 04, 2017 07:11PM

When they bear a fervent testimony:

"That's a statement about you; not about the Church."

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