9 - Seeing Elohim and Jehovah in the films who have long white hair and beards just like the depictions of Greek and Roman gods
8 - Putting on a green apron after Lucifer tells you to make one
7 - The four handshakes
6 - Having to take your slippers off to put on your robe and then having to change shoulders for Aaronic vs Melchizedek stuff
5 - Having to do the fourth handshake in the prayer circle and then put your left elbow on the person next to you so that you all connect physically like during a seance
4 - The blood oaths - the sign and then the execution of the penalty (at least when I went through in 1970)
3 - Chanting while raising your hands during the fourth sign. Even more so while chanting Pay Lay Ale (1970). Very, very cultish and even satanic IMO
2 - Getting the name of the second token of the Melchizedek priesthood though the veil (upon the five points of fellowship - 1970) and having it be such a long, nearly incomprehensible and drawn out name. I never, ever, ever understood why it had to be such a long name
1 - Getting wash and anointed on your bare skin (1970) during the initiatory phase of the endowment
Bonus answer: Drum roll please!! Having to keep a straight face during the entire thing.
Bonus answer #2: The phrase "hereunto appertaining" said during one of the prayers in the initiatory phase. What the hell does that mean? I had to memorize the prayers when I was an ordinance worker. And ever word had to be said exactly. Though to the credit of the powers that be, you could start over where you messed up instead of saying the entire thing over again like when young priests struggle with the sacrament prayer.
-- Wearing a weird white granny-nightie dress that's never opaque enough and never long enough.
-- Reading the sign on the locker warning me to remove all jewelry except wedding ring, stow it in the locker and then make sure the locker is locked because... theft. In. The. Temple.
-- Hearing elderly female temple worker whisper dead person's "new name" in my ear
-- Making covenant to obey husband (especially after divorce)
-- Veiling one's face during part of the endowment
-- Naked touching during initiatory (even if it's from other women, it's still weird)
-- Wide-open ponchos for initiatory
-- Alternating male and female participants in prayer circle
-- Having to do the "five points of fellowship" with a strange man through slits in a sheet
-- Worrying about the "wet t-shirt effect" when doing baptisms for the dead.
Even as a naive and believing 19 year old, I couldn't quite feature Jesus (who is supposed to know what's in your heart) standing at a heavenly gate and not letting you pass unless you knew certain hand grips and passwords.
First is the 5 points of fellowship--being knee to knee, chest to chest, etc., with an old man you don't know and haven't even seen. Sick and twisted. No wonder they removed it.
Washing and anointing.
SEALINGS when you are being sealed over and over again to a complete stranger and holding hands with them all that time. I'm not a touchy feely kind of person. (I never went back after this.)
Baptisms for dead wearing those see-through outfits when they are wet and then the old bitches telling me to take it off before they would give me a towel. I am also very "modest." This was abusive to me.
The prayer circle and, yes, putting your elbow on the next person's shoulder. What were we doing with the other arm? We were using both of them because my veil kept falling off and I couldn't hold it on.
I'm SO GLAD I never have to go back there. Every time my daughter tells me she is going to the temple, it gives me the weevies. At least she is going there with the guy I KNOW she should marry. They were dating 4-1/2 years ago and now are dating again. If she's going to marry a mormon, this is the one she should marry.
cl2 Wrote: ---------------------------------------- > The prayer circle and, yes, putting your elbow on > the next person's shoulder. What were we doing > with the other arm? We were using both of them > because my veil kept falling off and I couldn't > hold it on. >
You had your other hand doing one of the handshakes with the person on the other side of you. If I remember correctly.
Weird? Watcha talkin bout, Willis? Nuttin weird about it. All normal people do things like that. Don't believe me? I was told by a sibling recently that ALL the people who know both of us think that I'm crazy (and they're normal). Course, ALL the people who know both of us are those "normal" people who honestly believe they can buy their way into heaven (no matter how much fraud they commit or how vile and nasty they are), that they have to know secret passwords and secret handshakes to get into heaven, that they'll be transformed into slim, young people who are attracted to each other so they can have endless sex when they die and that their underwear has magical powers.
As you guessed, I was very insulted. Those people think I'm crazy. I've lost so much sleep over that.
And celestial sex has to be the best sex, one would think. Never any wood problems, no matter how old you are, that sort of thing. And one's foreskin restored, because... resurrection.
I really have no idea the appeal of temple activities, even among the true believers.
My wife and I occasionally have dinner with a couple from her ward. A number of times we met after they had spent a long day at the temple.
They'd come into the restaurant and plop themselves across from us in the booth with smug, self-satisfied weariness. But they would soon rally themselves to tell us of the "important work" they had selflessly done that day, and vow to rededicate themselves to their sacred endeavor.
It's all I can do to not giggle and guffaw in their faces.
You know about durians? You walk around in Jakarta all the time asking yourself, "What the HELL is that stench??" They don't allow them on public transportation.
I've always wanted to try it. I live in an area with HMart and multiple chains of asian stores. Many have fresh durian, and also durian ice cream, cakes, etc. I've always wanted to try it, but I'm afraid I'll love the taste but the odor will repeat on me. Like vitamins. You know they're good for you, but they repeat.
I always found it weird that one must get all dressed-up before going to the temple. I knew many members who drove to and from work passing a temple but never stopped to attended because they were not properly attired and it was too much bother or too far to go home, change, and return again. What's the big deal? You change your clothes when you get inside and can even take a shower if need be. So why make it so darned difficult for average Joe Mormon to attend? David Bednar even made a big stink about women who wore less than appropriate dresses like blue jean dresses. Spit! I always wore my blue jean dress to the temple because it was so easy to slip in and out of fast. If I were still Mormon, attending the temple would be the first thing I would put on my "just not worth it" list of Mormon duties right after "cleaning the chapel". Maybe temples should have mud rooms so the filthy laborer can slip in unobserved and make himself presentable before doing the Lord's work. And they wonder why Mormon temple attendance is so low. What knit wits those GA's must be.
The SECRETness... The uselessness... The wastefulness... The rediculousness... The EXCLUSIVENESS... The sacreligiousness... The ignorance of sacredness... The foolishness of it all!