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Recovery from Mormonism (RfM) discussion forum. 
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Posted by: scaredhusband ( )
Date: October 11, 2017 11:00PM

I haven't posted here in a while. The main reason why I haven't been is because life is great. Occasionally I will lurk and peruse the threads but I find that there are other things that I enjoy doing more. (No, you aren't boring!)

Living with a believing spouse is difficult but well worth it because love, and family are what matters. Common values that my wife and I still share. Our marriage is in a good place despite my change of belief. We have grown as a couple and have a stronger relationship because of it. We allowed each other to grow our own spaces for belief or non-belief.

Church is an activity that my wife generally doesn't feel like doing. No complaints from me. YAY! More time for us to spend as a family. I have treated mormonism as a non issue and so far it has worked to keep the peace in the home. I'm sure my wife enjoys me more when she isn't getting lectured on how many wives JS had, etc.

I just wanted to end with a big thank you to everyone still around when I posted my first "Help, I just woke up and am freaking out" post, and every "I need advice" post after. This community was a great place for me to land and start picking myself up. Thank you for being a support group when I needed one and had nowhere else to go. I hope that this forum will be the same help to others.

Thankfully,
The not so scaredhusband.

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Posted by: Tevai ( )
Date: October 12, 2017 12:42AM

I am very glad that things are working out well for you and your wife, scaredhusband...

This is a wonderful update to read tonight!

:)

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Posted by: BI ( )
Date: October 12, 2017 12:56AM

Sounds like you’ve found a spot in the middle where you both feel comfortable.

It’s great to hear things are going better for you!

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Posted by: GNPE ( )
Date: October 12, 2017 01:03AM

The LDS ran out of faith a Long Time ago, it's mostly Fear now.

just sayin'

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Posted by: Soft Machine ( )
Date: October 12, 2017 03:53AM

Glad you worked it out together :-)

All the best to you both

Tom in Paris

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Posted by: anonuk ( )
Date: October 12, 2017 06:26AM

nice

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Posted by: ificouldhietokolob ( )
Date: October 12, 2017 11:56AM

I'm so glad this didn't wind up one of the "bad" stories.
And that you're in a good place, as is your wife.

Enjoy every minute with your family. And thanks for sharing your experiences here!

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Posted by: Amyjo ( )
Date: October 12, 2017 07:43PM

This is very good news.

Thanks for the update!

:)

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Posted by: Done & Done ( )
Date: October 12, 2017 08:04PM

Good for you---both of you. It DOES take two to tango.

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Posted by: BYU Boner ( )
Date: October 12, 2017 08:06PM

Very best, man! I hope things continue to work well for you and your wife! Hugs, The Boner.

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Posted by: summer ( )
Date: October 12, 2017 11:08PM

It's great to hear that things are going well! A loving family really should come first, with church (if at all) somewhere down the priority list.

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Posted by: catnip ( )
Date: October 13, 2017 12:32AM

Or maybe I should say "non-believer" and inactive but believing TBM. But love trumps religion in our case. We have not let our differences come between us, ever.

As you may have seen in my other recent post, today marked our 26th anniversary. We are still very much in love, though in somewhat declining health.

DH told me that if I "go" first (which seems pretty likely), he plans to see that temple work is done for me and he will have us sealed. I told him he can't do that, as I am an apostate. He says (in the sweetest possible way) that all this can be ironed out.

I don't see any point in getting upset about this. Being loved is a wonderful thing. If it brings him comfort to think that a temple sealing can keep us together for eternity, I'm OK with that. I don't really buy into the "eternity" thing, but HE does, and if he loves me enough to do the temple mumbo-jumbo, hey - who am I to object?

It's the LOVE part that counts.

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