As I am in a similar situation right now, I wanted to hear any stories of former mormons dating (or married to, whatever) non-mormons who happened to help them out of mormonism. Is there anything in particular that your partner did which helped you break through? (ex. perhaps offer more love and understanding than the church, help you find resources, etc.)

And if you WERE the non-mormon who managed to get your mormon lover out of the church, what approach did you use?

I left the church first. I started bringing up the issues with my family. The children were willing to listen, but my husband wasn't. Several of my children and I were suffering from mental health issues because of the church. My daughter is the one who really brought him out. She is an artist and writer. He happened to come across some of her writings and paintings. It broke his heart. I really see that is when he started to listen and study. It was really hard to be patient, but as long as he was studying I was pretty OK. Truth was on my side. It took him about 3 years, but we made it through.

my convert was instrumental in my exit ......along with all of the LYING that Gordon BS Hinckley did ........does that count ????

I told him about it but didn't want to admit the embarrassingly ridiculous details. Just wanted to put it behind me.

Unfortunately, morg locals started harassing me two or three years later. I felt humiliated that DH had to find out I grew up in such a lame and stupid cult, but there was no way around it. What other organization shows up on someone's doorstep for years while knowing they are unwelcome trespassers?

It was a crisis in the marriage because DH would be furious seeing how much these intrusions bothered. He wanted to cuss these people and send them off feeling beaten and humiliated.

Eventually, I gave him full permission to react in whatever way he wanted, but that's another story.

Mormons would be wise to leave people alone when they say that's what they want.

Well. I was trying sooo hard to reconcile my faith with my reality....I was newly divorced after a 23 year temple marriage to a man who came out as a gay man. My mind was blown at the devastation of it all. LDS doctrine really had no answers for me, but, oh how I was trying to find them.

AOL was brand new...the whole internet thing was brand new. There were chat rooms by topic or ages, as I recall. I participated in a few. There was a feature that let you send a private message to any of the participants. We all had profiles, too. I was intrigued by one and especially his quote. I sent him a message that just said "nice quote". We started chatting, emailing and finally talking on the phone. We met and ended up getting married. He relocated to Utah. The marriage did not last long, but I will always be SO grateful for his insight into this harmful religion I was a part of. He really called out a lot of the BS he heard and saw. I was so fearful about all the bad things that I thought would happen to me if I "sinned". I will never forget the switch that flipped when he said to me, "it's just sex" as I agonized about making love to someone without being married to him.

My path out was in large part due to him and his "outside looking in" view of all things mormon. And I will always love him for that.