My friend I've known for 10 years sent me this:

"Look man. I'm gonna tell you the truth. Your life has been out of control the whole time I've known you. And from what you've told me from your past it wasn't much better when you were younger. I think you need to see a professional that can help you. I don't want you to think I'm judging you, I'm just trying to be a friend. I hate that life is as hard as it for you."

I don't know how to process this. I had periods of what I thought were peaceful times. Maybe I'm broken.

I'm paired with my opposite currently. Crash course in making my heart inaccessible.

Just rambling because I don't know how to make sense of my world currently. I barely get to see my kids. Which makes things one step closer to totally effed up

The older you get, the more you realize that nobody knows what they are doing.

We are all trying our best to make it through the best way we know how.

Are you out there intentionally trying to hurt people? No? Then you are good in my book man.

> I'm paired with my opposite currently. Crash course in making my heart inaccessible.
What in the hell do you mean by this? Are you just shacking up in a go nowhere relationship?

> I barely get to see my kids.
Your choice? Do you really want more time with them?

It sounds like you are at a crossroad and need some help but you're going to need to be more specific. I'm genuinely interested but you gotta throw us bone here.

I had to put my pride aside and see a counselor and it has helped, admitting that others were right and that there may be something wrong is difficult but now I see flaws in everybody else and I want to recommend they get help but I don't.

What does your friend mean by, "out of control?" What is it exactly that makes your life hard? Depending on what is going on, your friend might have a point. Most of us have benefitted from the services of a counselor, physician, etc. at one time or another.

I have learned over the course of my life ----- we all need help. Maybe not a counselor but self help.

I recently attended a seminar in achieving goals.

You would think a room of 'high achievers' attempting to be 'higher achievers'. Not so.

Many had day to day issues that significantly impacted what I would call 'normal' day to day living. Others were very successful and just wanted 'more' success or going to the next level in some area of their life. Others in between.

What we all found out was that we all had 'issues' impacting us from 'going to the next level' no matter what level we were on now.

The basic thing the seminar did was help us identify 'those things, internally normally' that were not allowing us to go to the next level and how to get them out of the way.

Most people can read books to find out more about 'themselves' and how we achieve goals or anything important in life. Others need a friend or professional help.

Based on what you provided I have no idea what you need. I suggest visit a library and find books on 'achieving' whatever you are interested in (peace of mind, clarity, financial soundness, weight or addiction control, etc.).

If you need professional help it is probably very cost effective in the long run ------ considering what kind of life you are now in versus want or should have.

I have known many people who 'really needed' help but had no idea where to go or how to start.

Everyone 'can' get by on their own somehow but what are you giving up that you should be doing/experiencing now in your life?

I have a friend that does this weekend seminar thing that he swears by so maybe you don't need to go the counselor route, he says it changed his life drastically but I think it costs a pretty penny.

Not a real friend.

IF you write back, say is that all you've got to say for yourself? CRITICAL, not HELPFUL. Disconnect. Ignore. Move on. 2 sense-

I was thinking the same thing as Readwrite. Your "friend" is giving you destructive criticism, not constructive criticism.

For all we know, you might have only one flaw that bugs him, or he might be jealous, or he might be in competition with you. It could all be him, and not about you at all.

We need more information. If you're divorced, a divorce can make you feel like you've hit rock bottom. A vindictive ex can make your life a living Hell. Is your spouse preventing you from seeing your kids? If we had more information, we could help you.

I worried about my son, who took his divorce very hard. I forced him to go see my psychiatrist, who declared him to be perfectly OK, and a little sad, like anyone would be, in a divorce situation.

Maybe you need a therapist to assure you that you are OK! Perhaps other "friends" have been gaslighting you also? I nearly went crazy, having all my Mormon former "friends" tell me I was evil, because I was leaving their cult. They ganged up on me as a group, and cursed me, and threatened me, and my children, too. Luckily, my kids and I had each other as witnesses to this nastiness, whenever a Mormon would decide to go into "smiling salesman mode" and try to win us back. Their phoniness keeps you off balance, and makes you doubt your own heart. Find out more about gaslighting. Maybe you are deliberately being made to feel like you are a bad person.

Do people want money from you? Revenge? Did you officially resign or openly criticize their religion? Were your children brainwashed against you?

Mormonism can cause chaos in otherwise peaceful lives.