For reasons I won't waste your time describing, I've decided not to attend anymore baptisms, baby blessings, or any other church function where certain people show their "worthiness" by wearing white shirts and standing in circles or entering certain buildings leaving others outside.

I've decided not to attend even for family members, nephews/nieces etc.

Doing it quietly but know that it will be noticed.

Is anyone doing the same or contemplating it and why if so?

Trump. All my family is in Texas.

For me, it helps that I live in California, while the TBM's live in either Nevada or Utah, so I just make sure I'm not visiting my mom when a step grandchild is having their 8th birthday.

I have always been asked to play the piano for these functions. In the past, I would just say sure...feeling like I was being a good family member by supporting them, even though I don't believe in their religion. No harm to me. I even accompanied "I Am A Child of God" for my cousins and siblings to sing at my grandmother's funeral many years ago. But now that I know so much more of the 'meat' of the religion, I'm thinking along the same lines as you. I don't really want to participate. The next baptism that I might get asked to play the piano for isn't for 3 years. I have time to figure out what I'm going to do. lol

Been my stance for years. I find my psyche simply is not up to dealing with any of it. I simply refuse be that ingenious to myself. No one asks or expects my attendance at religious events any more either. Life is good. Life is good. All is well.

I know that I always feel out of place whenever I witness by brothers, cousins, etc. stand in a circle and leave me out.

I have also felt out of place when I attend a wedding and wait outside the temple. I had to do that for my oldest Son's wedding.

It feels to me like the Church purposefully separates the wheat from the "chaff" in order to put pressure on the less active men to pay tithing and get back to church.

This may be part of the reason, the Bishop doesn't handle all baptisms and ordinations.

I can see myself choosing not to attend at all. It is arguably disrespectful on thier part.

I seriously think that mormons read in admiration and interest if you show up to their official events. That's why I don't do it. They're pushy enough without egging them on.

I agree with Cheryl. I am quite sure they are hopeful you will 'feel the spirit' and come running back to the fold. We have made a point to not join in on the church time of the event, but will stop by for the family function afterward. My husband and I want to show love and support, and also not look like angry apostates. However we wear whatever we want taking extra care not wear dresses or white shirts.

I thought I could attend "special" occasions, but I get just as much anxiety over a Christmas program, or grandchildren singing as I do regular church. Sick to my stomach, and dizziness, and feeling like screaming. It usually takes a few days to get my good humor back. So I,also, am trying to figure out how to stop going to even those things.

Why would I attend a church event where everyone swears to the truth of something I know to be a total fraud and looks down their noses at me while doing it?

Not a difficult decision at all.

I'm doing the same from here on out it was so ridiculous how I felt outside these circles but I think it was even more weird when I was in them I was not meant to be a Mormon its just wrong to the soul. But I got to stay away from these events because I want live a normal life these mormon things are not normal they affect the mind and I got enough crap to dig through right now.

I stopped attending religious family events several years ago, and luckily it hasn't been too big a deal. I reached a point where it was unbearable for me, so I started saying I was working or would be out of town during the event. It's a lie and we all know it, but they've learned to let it be. I've just said no enough times that they stopped asking. I still get notices and invitations, which I appreciate, and I send cards and gifts for things like weddings and babies, but no one really expects me to attend. I've even mostly cut my missionary brother out of my life for the time being because I can't bear his awful missionary emails. I send him postcards so that he knows I love him, but it's a one-way form of communication so I don't have to listen to his heartbreaking brainwashed bullshit.

The only exception I've made was for my teenage niece's funeral. It was held in an LDS church. I wore pants (I'm a woman), and did not participate in prayers. I wasn't trying to make a statement or anything. I just don't like skirts and don't pray. I don't think it would have bothered her, and hers was the only opinion I cared about it.

For the most part I won't attend Mormon family functions. My niece invited me to her son's baptism and I just said "No thank you."

My nephew got married in the temple a couple of years ago. My husband and I (we're gay) went to San Diego with the rest of the family and stayed for a week. But we did not go to the temple. (We went to a nude beach instead, which was much more fun!) We went to the reception that night. My Mom was a bit upset with me and asked why we didn't go to the wedding. I told her, "Because we weren't invited." She said, "Of course you were invited." So I asked her when the Mormons started letting gay men in the temple. She didn't say anything after that.

I went to my home ward's Christmas program this year because my niece was singing a solo. And I went to a nephew's Eagle Court of Honor a couple of years ago. And I'll go to funerals, even if they're held in a Mormon church. But that's it.

I stopped going long ago, probably after my niece's baptism.

My mother quoted the scripture about the sin being upon the head of the parents if they didn't teach their kids to be baptized in a talk. Two of my kids were close to my niece's age. I was sitting there thinking, "She's talking about us! Should I get up and walk out, or not?"

I didn't walk out. But I decided I wasn't ever going to be a sitting duck for passive aggressive comments again.

We don't attend baptisms at all. We don't attend blessings, but we go for the party afterwards, sometimes, and we joke about it.

We don't show up at temples and wait outside, but we go to receptions and wedding brunches afterwards. We treat this as obvious, rather than apologizing for it. Of COURSE we aren't going to go to a wedding we aren't allowed to see.

I will say that it's probably easier for us, because we aren't skipping any of our children or siblings' events. That would be a much harder call to make. All these events are for nieces and nephews. None of our kids are in the church.

Yes. I've done it years ago and my biggest regret was not doing it sooner. If they make you feel crappy and don't knock it off, make some distance between yourself and them. In the meantime, cultivate more friendships with people who have healthy boundaries. This will take time (and you'll run into some bad friendships at first as you learn to weed out unhealthy people who have the same issues as your family), but it's so worth it. Do lots of reading and (if possible) finding a good therapist helps.

I think the question you have to ask yourself is "Do I want to go?"

If you the answer is no, and if these events cause a lot of stress or annoyance, then you need to stop going.

The sad thing I realized is that most, if not all extended family get-togethers revolve around church functions: blessings, baptisms, missionary farewells/homecomings, weddings, and funerals. BTW, I always attend funerals, and usually end up participating on the program. I figure I can put up with the POS (Plan of Salvation) talk so I can say goodbye.

Sadly, if you don't go to these things, you won't stay as involved in the family. But when it comes right down to it, most extended family relationships are superficial if the only time you see them is at those planned events.

We almost never chat on the phone, or hang out together just for fun. Writing this makes me realize that we should make more of an effort to get together with siblings and their families just for fun, and without any church involvement.

Standing outside the temple is WAY better than having to go in.

Same for standing outside of the circle.

Being an apostate means that if you do show up to events you have no expectations or responsibility. You simply to get to attend.
For me thats a plus.
standing in blessing circles, giving baptism talks, being a witness, going through an endowment, these are the things that cvaused me anxiety, therefore without them I dont mind attending.

The other people who attend dont tend to bother me. People who are the type to assault others at these events usually know not to talk to me, because I say exactly what I think. And if they do, well then even better! I love the chance to have a frank conversation.
However, these kinds of events are usually very dull and a waste of time anyway, so you arent missing a thing.