My TBM relative grates my nerves to the point that if she died, I would be relieved. I'm so over the emotional tantrum equal to a 2 year old, about a glass of alcohol. I'm over her whining that the holiday didn't go the way she envisioned. She called after Thanksgiving stating that she would have Christmas with a Mormon family because her family drank. She doesn't have to put up with it! No one drank around her or on her property. The emotional string pulling has me to the point that I told her go have Christmas with Mormons! When I called her bluff, she started stammering about how she had no one to have it with. So not my problem!

There's no good reason to keep people that poison your life in your life.
I think you did the right thing -- tell 'em to go somewhere else. If, like your relative, they then whine about still wanting to be around you, lay down some simple ground rules. Like keep your trap shut about the church, and you can hang out all you like.
If they show up and can't keep quiet about the church, invite them to leave. And mean it.

She doesn't need to die. She just needs to learn normal, non-mormon social skills.

Good luck.

I don't think OP wishes this person to die...but the stress, anxiety, emotional abuse, etc. would cease to exist for OP if this TBM were no longer around. I actually said a similar thing to my nevermo hubby last night..."I know this sounds awful, but this religion/church would be a non-issue for me if my TBM parents (ESPECIALLY TBM mother) were no longer alive." Of course I don't wish death on them, but damnit they are the only ones who cause me all this pain and suffering in regards to their church that I broke away from almost 20 years ago. My TBM siblings don't make an issue of it, and I can easily handle mishies and current or former TBM friends. I hope this religion dies with my parent's generation!!!!!!

If I were in your position, I would suggest that she find one of the (probably) several places in her area that are serving Christmas meals to homeless and food-insecure people and families, and volunteer there for the day.

Just about guaranteed to be alcohol-free!!!

:) :) :)

What a great idea! +++

"So not my problem!"

No, it's not your problem, but people like her push their issues onto others, making it their problem. Ignore her. Acknowledging her made up issues will only ensure further behavior of the same kind. Ignore the woman and her self created drama!

Keep in mind that the Church encourages a needy mentality in its women to keep them dependent on the cult. It might not be intentional (okay, from what I see in the Q15 maybe it is), but mindless following creates that in people. Drama creation follows.

I think she can create her dramas with out you just fine.

Thanks guys