I remember an event that happened in our family (siblings with their spouses) many years ago.

One of our brothers was never an active member of the Mormon Church, whereas several of the rest of us (and our spouses), were.

At a family dinner party, my brother-in-law (formerly inactive, but at that time a stalwart member), bore what the rest of us thought was a powerful testimony as to the truthfulness of the church.

The sibling brother we were trying to convince politely held his ground, and spoke of how he realized this testimony was sincere and meant a lot to the person giving it, and others, but that this did not mean that the doctrine being testified to was actual fact.

The rest of us were stunned by this response from the infidel, to what we all believed had been such an influential testimony.

Nonetheless, the non-believer was right. It doesn't matter how many, or how fervently a person believes something, and testifies as to its truthfulness, still doesn’t prove it true.

Indeed, testimonies alone cannot prove something is true, especially if it is not.

So, if one’s testimony means little or nothing to a hold-out (especially someone who may know a heck of a lot more about religion than does the missionary), how can a missionary or fervent member of the church get around this stumbling block, when they hope to be able to convert someone into the Mormon faith?

The answer to this question is that the people who hope to be able to sell Mormonism to someone else, need to know a heck of a lot more about their own religion than they were taught in Sunday school or seminary. However, one should take heed in this regard, as really studying Mormon doctrine can lead one’s self right out of the church they thought they believed in and loved. The reason this is so, is because Mormon doctrine is full of holes that have been large enough to cause many others to drop out of activity.

So, what to do after one leaves the church? The answer, of course, depends on what an individual would like to do. Still, it is to be hoped that one will find something progressive for them to do in their newly found spare time (and there certainly are many good causes one can support which will also help them develop new friendships and find a new contentment).

This is my educated testimony, based on decades of experience, and which I hope will be helpful to those struggling to find a happier life outside the church.

My experience and observation is that hearing the testimony repeated so many times led, in part, to my accepting the whole story/claims/etc. of Mormonism. I could accept their claims because so many were in agreement. Also, I was young and impressionable and a new convert. This was the group I joined. They must be legitimate. That led me to think there must be something wrong with me if I could not accept their claims. Of course, that is not true, but when immersed so heavily in the whole traditional, religious culture (tribe) in my total environment there was no room for disagreement. I was outnumbered if I even had a concern, or doubt, and there were dozens of people to clear up anything I asked. Especially my new husband that I trusted. I was faced with the notion: how could 10,000 (or more) people be wrong? I lived in Wymount Married Student housing on BYU campus for years as a new convert. I knew and saw nothing else but Mormonism 24/7.

I remember one time I was invited to a F&T meeting. Afterward I was asked what I thought about it.

I said it sounded like nothing except someone preaching to the choir. It's like belonging to a service organization like the Moose or Kiwanis, you don't preach to the members encouraging to join the club.

I was young at the time.

If someone were to ask me now what I thought of F&T meeting, I'd say it sounds like the BoM story about the Rameumpton. I can clearly remember when, as a fully immersed member, reading that story and getting a sickly feeling in the pit of my stomach how it is just like F&T meeting. I never once participated in that and always felt so uncomfortable when people would do it, like I felt embarrassed for them.

I don't remember anyone telling me their testimony when I was an investigator although they probably did. A testimony, to me, was the sort of thing Evangelical preachers always gave on TV to bring in money. It sort of turned my stomach when they did it. I still get turned-off when I hear testimonies.

What reeled me in was how very literate the missionary was who found our family. He really knew his Bible and did a very good job of showing how the Bible made reference to the BofM. This also impressed my mother who was raised in a religious private school. I know how made-up all those references are now but this missionary knew the Bible well enough to make it all seem so logical. It didn't hurt that I knew so little about the Bible not to mention Mormonism. He later received his PhD in ancient languages and wrote some best seller books for Deseret Books.

If that missionary had been as clueless as most missionaries are today and had given the kind of zealous testimony that most give these days, as they are taught to do, I would have run for the hills. Since most of the hidden mysteries are no longer taught, there really isn't anything else the missionaries can do except blast investigators with their enthusiasm. Giant turn-off!

I don't allow testimonies. I tell them that it only tells me you are convinced. It doesn't tell me what is actually true.

It is amazing how quiet things get when you take away that option.

^^^^^^!!!

I agree. A testimony is a statement of what someone else believes. My response would be, "That's nice." Why would it have any effect on what I believe? I'm a grownup. I can make up my own mind!

I returend to my home town after 4 years at BYU with my degree, my little family fully inactive, and fully done with the church.

Dad sends a young convert to talk to me....he had married a local girl....might have been his missionary that converted him.

Anyway, he called a few times trying to be my new best friend. When the chit chat didn't work on me, he bore his testimony.

When he was done, I replied, "and what does that have to do with me"? He looked perplexed and didn't know what I meant.

I said, "your testimony is yours, it stops at the end of your nose...it doesn't jump over to me and work and it doesn't prove anything to me".

He got what I meant, paused a long time, stumbled for words, and we said goodbye.

According to Packer you can convince yourself if you do it enough.