[Continued from http://exmormon.org/phorum/read.php?2,1532047]


THE STICK OF JOSEPH:
The Wild Adventures of "Evening Joe" Smith

33.
Joe drifted east along the road, back into Illinois
To make a place to rule at will. He never thought to pity
The dwellers of his fetid swamp: "I know it will annoy
Those who maligned me to behold Nauvoo, my private city."

34.
Intending to become a lethal force throughout the region,
Joe raised a standing army knowing that would throw a scare
Into the Gentiles. On his horse before the Nauvoo Legion,
He swaggered like a conqueror ascending to his chair.

35.
Unchecked there, Joe exhibited licentious misbehaviors
With married women, even sending husbands out on missions,
Explaining that by "marrying" him, they could act as saviors
If they would only try out his new "doctrinal" positions.

36.
He slept with Zina Jacobs, Patty Sessions and her daughter;
With Mary Lightner, Sarah Cleveland, and Marinda Hyde.
He tried seducing Sarah Pratt; because he never caught her,
He smeared her, driving Orson to attempted suicide.

37.
As Joe gave out the signs and tokens, he was far from loath
To mention garments, secret names, or baker's hats – a tip-off
That veils and Pay Lay Ales, plus acting out a bloody oath,
Were obviously parts of a direct Masonic rip-off.

38.
Joe taught that if a spirit wanders by to share some news,
A simple handshake will determine if he's on the level.
If he's legitimate, then he'll disdainfully refuse;
But should his hand pass through yours, he's a minion of the devil.

39.
When plates were found near Kinderhook, and Joe was asked to take
A look, he claimed they came from the posterity of Ham.
But sadly that discovery turned out to be a fake;
In spite of Joe's prophetic might, he'd fallen for the scam.


[**To be continued in Part 6**]


Note:

[#36] Marinda Hyde, wife of Apostle Orson, was born Marinda Johnson and was the "sister" referred to in #18. A full 10 years had elapsed, proving that JS well knew the value of perseverance.