Although we would like to believe it is.....it isn't. In the case of a woman, the Relief Society and

her counselors are notified so they do not ask the person to pray or participate in any of the lessons.

The Secretary is notified. The visiting teachers are no longer allowed to visit so they have to

be notified. The entire bishopric is notified so they do not call her to a position or ask her to

pray. The Stake Presidency knows for the same reasons. If she is in a church calling, she is immediately

released. So whats's left


I think it is about the same for the men.

also, they go Backwards in time, across the country...

I was living in Ohio when I was Ex'd, someone called my frmr ward (new Bp even!) & told them!

I could be wrong but if you move, don't they contact the

bishop or stake President in your new area, if they happen to

your address?

do you mean when ('if') a frmr (resigned/'Ex'd) person moves?


a) How would they know? are they (still) keeping track of Ex'd people???


do Ex'd people send their frmr Bp's their new address (phone, email, etc.)


this doesn't sound likely / practical, at least to me.

I've been in Eastern Kentucky for 18 months and have yet to hear from them, even though they do have a church in town. It may simply be that my former Utah bishop knows full well how I feel and is respecting me. He is a pretty good guy. I'm sometimes attending the Unitarians now because they make a point of being non-judgemental about what people choose to believe. They don't ask you to wear funny underwear or memorize secret handshakes, either. Formally joining the UU'S would be grounds for getting exed from the Mormons, though.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/21/2015 03:34PM by rationalist01.

If you are exed by your BP, he announces your excommunication in PEC meeting comprised of the elder's quorum president (or a councilor if he is not available) and the HPGL (or a councilor if he didn't attend the meeting). In other words, the entire elder's quorum and HPGL presidency knows about it. The bishopric already knows about it as the council was held in their presence. The ward clerk knows about it as he has to type up and send your luv court form to SLC. The exec was present and took notes during your luv court so he knows. The RS president is notified and she notifies her councilors so you don't get issued any callings, calls you to be a VT nor asked to pray.

Your list of don't is: Do not pay tithing nor offerings, no callings, no public prayer, no taking the sacrament, no temple attendance (you have no recommend), no VTing nor HTing and no garment wearing.

There is no way to conceal the fact that you are not taking the sacrament as those around you will figure it out, and the choir director visibly can spy on you from the choir loft. During the summer you have to come up with thick clothes so the fact that you are not wearing garments doesn't become known. If you have had a visible calling or multiple callings, it will become obvious that you are not serving.

My 10-year-excommunication anniversary is coming up. I'm still free!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/21/2015 12:15PM by danielle.

Normally disciplinary action doesn't result in any information being given. But when it does, it is usually --- don't ask ___ to help (not ____ has been disfellowshipped).

No one told RSP or anyone else when I was disfellowshipped or when I was excommunicated. My visiting teachers continued to come until I moved, and in my new place I got vters assigned (it has to be done manually nowadays because the name isn't in the computer anymore, and the bishop is supposed to specifically obtain permission to continue having contact (which they didn't in my case). I had never had HTers visit, but I assume they were still in place too.

The reasons for release are never given from the pulpit. And people are released all the time.

Discipline is only announced when necessary to protect the innocent and when it is a church leader who people need to know not to follow anymore.

That wasn't how it was in our ward. The RSP and counselors were all notified as was the secretary.

When I formally left and filed for divorce, my bishop went to all of my children and tried

to urge them to take my husbands side.


It's not the pulpit where these things are revealed. It's in their Correlation meetings.

lolly 18 Wrote:


> Discipline is only announced when necessary to
> protect the innocent and when it is a church
> leader who people need to know not to follow
> anymore.

Would you mind quoting your source for this, lolly?

This isn't what occurred with the LDS church during my experience and certainly isn't typical of others' experiences here either.

Observing and listening to my husband and his friends has taught me otherwise.

My women friends and I gossip much less than most of the men I know. I'm thinking my experience might be typical.

This took place in Canada and I was actually told that they

would be letting the Relief Society presidency know. Several

of the things my Bishop did were really hurtful. There was

a definite undercurrent because of the fact that I happened to

be an American on top of everything else, and I heard plenty

about that.

They used to announce excommunications in sacrament meeting. This was a long time ago. Perhaps that wasn't done everywhere but I remember them doing so in my ward. It always put a dark cloud over the meeting after they announced one.

Not doing this was the exception.

Once when I was in priests quorum I was chosen to be one of the assistants (I don't think that quorum has a proper presidency since the Bishop is technically the presidency or something like that). In one of our private meetings with the Bishop, he was talking about the people in the quorum and we were discussing ways to help them towards serving a mission. One of my friends had a non-mormon girlfriend at the time, and the Bishop told me he's worried he won't want to leave her to go on a mission, so he told me to pay close attention to their relationship (something along these lines). This felt so wrong to me even as a TBM. Also, this guy was TBM through-and-through, I knew he was 100% definitely going to serve a mission regardless of his girlfriend, so it wasn't like the Bishop was even justified in his concern. Perhaps he didn't know him as well as me.

I sat in loads of presidency meetings over the years where we gossiped about people, but this case hit me the hardest of all, I think because it was a close friend of mine who was the victim this time, and the way the Bishop was talking it seemed like he was trying to hint that I should break them up.

Also, my father was in the Bishopric, and he told me multiple times over the years that I'd been the subject of discussion in meetings. I'd also had situations where I would tell someone at church something, then the next week some random person would come talk to me about it, even though they can't possibly have found out without gossiping. This happened very regularly as well, it wasn't a one-off.

Gossiping and passive aggressiveness are two of the biggest problems with today's church culture imo.

Thank you for sharing that. It was the worst period of my life. It has been five years and

I still shed tears over the way I was treated. But I survived it.

In the right state with liberal laws, it would be fun to bring litigation.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/21/2015 02:15PM by unabashed.

When I was in the singles ward, I typed for the bishop. It wasn't a calling. I just ended up doing typing for the bishop. I typed the program every week, etc. He had me type up court letters. I had forgotten. They really don't care who knows. I didn't have a calling, like I said, and nobody said "don't say anything." I didn't because I knew all the people I typed up letters for.

I remember as a child when my dad would come home from priesthood meeting and tell my mom someone had been ex'd.

When I was a single mother and had gone inactive, my VT is the only one who had my unlisted number. I allowed her to visit as we were friends (we usually just did lunch together). I started walking a lot and it was often at night. The bishop saw me out walking one night and started talking about it in bishopric meeting. This woman's husband was a clerk and he said something to her. I guess she read him the riot act about "she probably walks at night so a bunch of men won't talk about her in meetings on Sunday."

My dad also complained about all the gossip he heard in BM when he was a clerk.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/21/2015 03:23PM by cl2.