I cant take it anymore the pias of the mormons around me and ive tried to steer clear for a year now but i keep letting them trigger me they know exactly what to say to push my buttons so the badass is back to vent to my fellow friends that understand these things. Sundays are always the worst im not a bad guy but they make me feel like i am. Where's boner you still around i need your advice.

Eeks, you're welcome back anytime.

Still chillin' in Pocatello?

Hope things are getting a little better for you, perspective wise.

There was a thread or two in your absence wondering what had happened to you.

You've come to the right place to vent!

Where else are you going to find a motley crew of ex-Mos all in one place to kvetch with? :)

True that things have been getting better i feel like ive been making faster progress in the last few months for sure getting more solid mentally and physically not strong enough to leave this town but im getting there.

Do these people live in your home?

If they're neighbors and "friends" I think you could find ways to be away from their clutches on Sundays. Don't answer your door or phone and enjoy your day in a non-mormon way.

They dont live in my home but they think they know everything about me and i told them straight up yesterday to back off.

Who is "they," Adam? Family, neighbors, friends, local ward members?

Local member neighbors

What exactly are they saying that is upsetting you? We can give you some ideas for possible responses. And why are Sundays the worst?

Well they've been calling me a religious fanatical and it really set me off like no other and sundays are the worst because i was always forced to go to church against my will when i was young and was demonized for not going in my older days.

badassadam1 Wrote:
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> Well they've been calling me a religious fanatical and it really set me off like no other and sundays are the worst because i was always forced to go to church against my will when i was young and was demonized for not going in my older days.

Oh, so they are name calling. If they call you a religious fanatical again, just shrug and respond that *you* are not the one with his butt in a pew on Sunday. So who is the religious fanatical? Actually, I wouldn't discuss religion at all with them. Say, "Don't you spend enough time at church? Let's talk about something else. Do you believe this weather? (etc.)"

As far as they are concerned, you are inactive. You don't have to explain anything more than that. "I'm currently inactive, and it suits me just fine. When do you think we will get our first snow this year?" Don't be afraid to tell them to mind their own business if they persist. Don't tolerate disrespect.

As for Sundays, make them celebration days. Make plans beforehand, and get out and do something even if it's just reading the Sunday paper at the local coffee shop or seeing a Sunday afternoon movie.

Hey Adam, I always think Summer gives excellent advice. I agree with her about making Sunday's sometime special if you can.

And no, friend, you are not a fanatic, just hurt. Boner.

That is some great advice thank you and i almost said that very thing that im not the one doing the crazy rituals over and over although i do have hate in my heart for what religion has done to me

This is quizzical IMO. Why fanatical zealous Mormons would accuse someone else of religious fanaticism.

Knowing you from this board, you are hardly someone I'd consider fanatical. Not at all.

They may be projecting themselves onto you because you've distanced yourself from them.

Don't let em get to you.

The church is dysfunctional and creates zealots and religious fanatics.

It's another ploy they may be using to guilt you, shame you, &/or to shun you because you no longer believe in the lies.

You've taken a moral high ground. Does that make someone a fanatic to make a moral judgment? Heck no. You're to be congratulated. It takes a heckuva lot of maturity to do something that grown up.

Damn right thats what i was thinking i do feel like im on a more mature ground now with my decisions but i have to thank counseling for that its given me strength to have someone with a sane mind in my corner to help me feel like im not actually crazy.

Why do you take seriously people who believe in wooden submarines, angels with golden plates, and magic underwear?

Well i dont know good point maybe im not far enough away from it yet those wooden submarines seemed legit when i was a child you have to understand i loved that fantasy stuff.

When I was a child I thought as a child. You either grow the hell up or you'll forever be a child. Making the transition is painful, but that's how grace is. You earn it.

Although it's a choice you shouldn't have to make, like having an AK-47 placed in your hands at the age of 9 and made to believe that killing people with it is a good thing. It takes balls to tell the War lord to fuck off.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/13/2017 03:21PM by bradley.

It is a painful transition to be sure but i gotta do it. The child sees straight through the warlords bullshit after a while.

Have you resigned? Once you're off the books I understand most will leave you alone.

Not yet im just about strong enough for the resignation battle because it will be a battle like negotiating with a car salesman.

Alright i remembered my password now im really back

My resignation was smooth without any battles. I sent in the letter. I got a stupid letter from the so called bishop which I ignored. When things weren't moving along, I called Greg Dodge's office and within days, got my final letter that I was out.

What battle will you be having? Just tell them "the church doesn't work for me". Point out the 11th article of faith.

Hmmm maybe it would be smooth i dont want word to get out that i resigned at all though if possible.

They dont live in my home but they think they know everything about me and i told them straight up yesterday to back off.

I know that dealing with Mormons is annoying, especially because you have years of bad memories of their nastiness. But--I think you are doing fine. You wrote"

"They dont live in my home but they think they know everything about me and i told them straight up yesterday to back off."

You will have to tell them to back off, at least 50 times, each person! Stay strong and assertive. Build strong boundaries. Be patient, and keep telling them. You will have to be meaner than you would like to be, but Mormons just don't get it!

It's a thousand-times worse than dealing with used car salesmen! Let them know you aren't buying, and that you will never give them a dime. Don't explain or debate. Just close the door and move onto more uplifting things. Save your strength for your recovery. Best wishes to you!

Don't forget the "Does someone need a hug" scene from "Elf". If you act unhappy, they'll think you need more Mormonism.

So true they think thats the cure for everything.

They dont get it all and it blows my mind and i even told them a professional counselor gave me advice to tell them to back off and they still wouldnt back off no respect at all but i will keep getting stronger with my recovery i aint stopping for nobody no sirree bob.

Boundaries? What are boundaries? You must be speaking Martian.

When you resign you may notice an instant backing off by local members. Your name will be removed from local membership rolls which will remove you from home teaching lists, and house calls.

I've placed a "no soliciting" sign on my door to keep away salesmen and missionaries.

It's worked pretty well so far except for some lame Jehovah Witnesses who placed a flyer inside my door anyway. That really irked me, but they did it while I was away. If I'd have been here I may have told them off.

I don't care to discuss religion with any faith group. It just isn't my thing.

That's one thing I really like about Judaism is that it forbids proselytizing. That suits me just fine.

Howdy Badass, I've been wondering how you've been. I've been reading the board but not posting too much because of vacations and work. Big bro hugs, Adam!

Ive just been trying to improve myself and get better and it seems to be working i actually dont know how long ive been away from the board but i really needed support today cause my mind was racing and fuming this morning from what somebody said to me you know how it goes i think.

badassadam Wrote:
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> i really needed support today cause my mind was
> racing and fuming this morning from what somebody
> said to me you know how it goes i think.

Hey, I know what you mean! My wife just announced the toxic TBMs are stopping by. I want to run for cover!

Okay, so they're old, smelly, and pious as hell, but I don't have to play their silly games. I'll smile and if they say something stupid just raise my eyebrows high and give a little snort. It drives them crazy!

It's okay to be pissed off by what someone said. Once you've recognized you've been triggered, you can say to yourself, "That's it! I've given these wankers enough of my time and energy. I'm letting this shit go! Fuck yeah!" Remember, Bro, you're Bad Ass Adam--and you don't take shit from Mormons!

People here cares Badass, it doesn't matter if you haven't posted in a while. Just shout out if we can help. I'm glad to hear that you feel that you're making progress. Tomorrow will be a much better day. And if it's not, shout out. You'll feel better knowing that people care.

Hugs, man! Your friend, The Boner.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/13/2017 06:16PM by BYU Boner.

That reminds me of a guy I used to home teach. He would roll his eyes like they wanted to roll out of his head. I couldn't understand why he didn't get the awesomeness of the gospel. He should have chased me out of his house with a shotgun, but there are limits to what you can do.

Sometimes during the snort, I pass a little gas. The beauty of it is everyone blames grandpa.

What part of the country will you be moving to when you are able?

I have no idea yet