I have seen threads where people ask how they can get others to change their TBM beliefs. I believe TBMs are like addicts; only they can change if they want to make the change. No one can make them see the truth that the church is false. They have to make that decision for themselves.

I think that is right on. No matter what you say or do, TBM's will not hear you unless they are already beginning to question the truth and reality of mormonism. It's a toxic religion that holds many in their clutches. My hope is that the next generation can get past and even cleanse themselves of their ancestors delusional religious obsession.

If that addiction demands frequent application, comes between family members, takes money that should go elsewhere, dominates the addict's thoughts, becomes a subject of contention, ruins lives, turns mother away from child, man away from wife and addict away from reason, yes.

Yes. Looks like an addiction, acts like an addiction, destroys like an addiction. Must be an addiction.

An addictive mass delusion passed down from generation to generation until it's engrained into all aspects of a person's life. I know first hand, having lived that way for most of my 64 years. A very difficult addiction to break, but I finally did it earlier this year. Converts and outsiders can't understand the generational strength of its hold. I'm a fifth generation Mormon, some of whom were polygamists.

Congratulations First Freeman Tom Padley.

Now step this way for your new name and initiation...

JUST KIDDING!


Kathleen

It's interesting that as I look back on my life I have a very hard time believing that I bought this load of crap for so long. Now I'm trying to rationalize why I did. And at the same time I'm kicking myself for hanging on this long. But using the topic of this thread I can see why I held fast to the iron rod. I am a product of a multi-generational addictive delusion. Could this be a new acronym? Oh my God, I certainly hope so. MGAD!

It's also like being under the domination of an abusive authority figure.

Cheryl Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> It's also like being under the domination of an
> abusive authority figure.

Quite a few good points here, and you have brought up an angle that exhibits a lot. Bad, domineering religion,is much like an abusive relationship; there are many parallels.

The abuser takes control of the victims finances, friendships, schedule, and supplants (usually) his with (usually) her agendae. Its a cycle that starts with a courtship phase (recruitment and/or induction); then the honeymoon phase begins, and the victim is bonded by positive experiences. Then varying types and degrees of control are subtly applied with measures of conformity, compliance, obedience, and new expectations.

When the victim/member reacts negatively, deprivation of affection and/or punishment is applied, The abuser further restricts, even beats, the victim; the controlling church demotes the member, or may apply discipline such as forced counseling, gossip, exclusion from fellowship. Shunning and excommunication are the extremes here.

The offender is forced to repent to regain the abuser's affections, or the fellowship and approval of the church group.

There is also the fact that the abuser/controlling group maintains a double standard: what is permissible for one is not for the other. I could go on and on, but you get the point.

In Mormonism you keep expecting that YOU will get better because it's always your fault.


Kathleen Waters

What a great correlation! I've often thought similar thoughts since leaving the church. I think an addiction is something that you turn to for comfort, something that temporarily detaches you from whatever the underlying pain/problem is. Maybe that was part of the ploy with the WOW. You can't have any kind of substance addiction, so you turn fully to TSCC to "feel good".
When you do what you're supposed to and feel "the spirit", it gives you that sense of temporary comfort.

To me addiction does not sound right, but I struggle with the modernized ideas of addiction.

Bad habit
Programming
Accomodation
Biological adaptation (the people that make BICs have the biochemistry to tolerate being a BIc)

Maybe addiction, will follow this thread and the cases being made. Especially clinical addiction sounds off.

I tend to have the most curiosity about religion, especially fundamentalist religion in general with respect to biochemstry.

The case of the fundamentalist Muslims. They select out, often kill, shun, or exile those that do not conform well. Thus destroying their genetics and biochemstry so that it is not allowed to be shared in the TBM (true-believing Muslim) or passed along.

Perhaps those TBMs that stay throughout this chaos are the ones biologically inclined to obey without question and ignore or reject duality. For me these are both things that were emotionally painful to do and so my decisions made sense although consequence has been painful too.

Since genetics and addiction are associated, maybe this is how Mormonism is an addiction.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/22/2014 10:50AM by gentlestrength.

I've developed a bad habit called RFM. But perhaps this habit fills a need.

We don't want your money.
You decide the time you spend.
You don't have to come clean our houses or do our yard work.
We don't demand you bring others here.
We won't go track you down if you are not around for a week.

Not just Mormonism. Faith is just as addicting:

"Government approves popular folk remedy, with cautions"
http://packham.n4m.org/news1.htm

It certainly meets the mormon definition of addiction.

He has had problems with addiction to drugs, alcohol, etc., and he watches his TBM sister and her whole life is about Mormonism. Well, the vast majority. She does a lot of things and goes a lot of places, but everything is tied into Mormonism. EVERYTHING.

She gets a lot of positive feedback from the people in this ward as we were very active when living here. They are so thrilled even after 8 or 9 years that one of our family is back, that they all adore her. And she eats it up. And even though she does a lot of things, I DO NOT see her life as well balanced.

I can say this--at least she is more functional than her brother in terms of what society would expect. If I had to choose, I'd rather my son was TBM than to have seen him struggle like he has. He is doing a lot better right now, but it hasn't been easy.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/22/2014 12:39PM by cl2.

Maybe, but for me being an exmormon and lurking/reading here definitely is . . . my wife has even commented that I seem addicted to this website.

I started this thread because Mormonism filled an addictive need for me. I had a problem with alcohol before I joined the church but while in the church I did not drink. The church was my drink.

It filled me with what I needed and drink was no longer necessary. When finally I left the church I started to drink again. After a period of some fifteen years or so I finally

realized drinking for me was not working out and so I turned to AA. I've now been sober and much happier for nineteen months. By finally recognizing where I needed work I have found what the

Mormon church and drink could not give me and that is peace and contentment in my life.

Yours has meandered toward wisdom.