I am used to speaking loud and hollering and it really isn't a problem to me. He blames our misunderstandings on me. It is entertaining when words are misunderstood. We can all laugh. He is disappearing from conversations with a smile and a shake of his head.

What can I do?

What?

I need new ones, but I can't afford them. So I wear my 8-year-old pair.

If I didn't wear them to work, they'd be really mad at me. Whenever I forget to put them in, they're like, "Never mind. I'll tell you tomorrow." LOL

My mom wasn't crazy about hers, either. They are not perfect devices. I'm sorry, I know just how hard it is to communicate. Have you tried lowering your voice or otherwise changing your pitch? It may help.

Me:"Dad (74years young and in good health.) you seen mom

Dad:"There are three in the freezer. If were out, let me know and I'll get more."

His audiologist should be able to make adjustments. At 4K they should be able to be tuned to be comfortable.

Both of her parents were deaf. Her mother was completely deaf and her father could have benefited from hearing aids.

My dad used to get really angry at her for not wearing them. We got used to talking loud. My sister still does. She almost lost her hearing, too, so I wonder if my sister talks loud because she, herself, can't hear very well. My mother expected some of us to sign to her since we all knew sign language. It also became quite comical in our family, but sometimes it caused problems.

I don't know what you can do. Is he not wearing them on purpose? Is there a problem with the hearing aids?

I think my mother used them to check out. It gave her an excuse not to be social or not to understand on purpose.

cl2, you remind me of an excuse my Dad used to use. Whenever you asked him to do something he didn't want to do he'd say, "Sorry, didn't hear that. The battery on my hearing aide just went out." He did this for years before he eventually did get a hearing aide.

My brother has hearing aids. He hates using them too. The problem is that they pick up all the sounds around him. It is difficult to have a conversation because all the sounds in the room interfere making it difficult to concentrate on the conversation. Hearing aids do not work like the human ear which does filter out the background sounds.

due to a kidney disease that runs in our family. He has lost about 80% of his hearing. He, too, hates to wear his hearing aids because they amplify the ambient sounds as well as voices, and it is very difficult for him to make out conversation. But he wears them anyway, because otherwise, it seems like life is like watching TV with the sound turned way down.

He has taught his two little daughters to always make sure they have his attention (like, by tapping his arm), to face him straight-on when talking to him, and to articulate clearly. He is very matter-of fact about this with them, and they understand.

On their own, they have begun to incorporate their own sign language in talking to him. If they want to play in the back yard, for example, they will ask, "Daddy, can we play in the back yard?" while pointing to the back door.

That was my mother's problem as well. All sounds were amplified without discriminating between conversation and background noise. She had good quality hearing aids, but it didn't matter how many times the audiologist adjusted them, the sound quality still wasn't great.

*IF YOU WORKED IN A FACTORY, FOR 25 YEARS, YOU WOULD YELL TOO*

Yep, I get new pair of glasses, every year or three.

How would your like it, if I tripped over something & slugged you?

YOU would demand, that I adjust to my new glasses.

WELL, YOU can adjust to YOUR lose of hearing OR YOUR NEW FREAKIN hearing aid!

YOU CAN adjust, to YOUR situation, OR YOU can deal with it!

DON'T make YOUR problem, MINE,,,,Pops!

Life IS adjusting, to new situations.

People are getting pi$$¥ because I can't freaking hear them. I have horrible tinnitus and it drowns out everything... I can't hear the heavy sighs but I sure can see the rolled eyes. My boss thinks I'm a pain in the arse, and even my husband gets impatient. It's even worse in a noisy room or with the tv on, and my husband is one of those who always has to have the dang tv on!

I feel your pain. I can't hear well either, and get frustrated at sound coming from multiple sources all at once. Never could. I just quit answering people if they yell at me from other rooms.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/29/2014 08:22PM by snuckafoodberry.

Stop yelling, and stop repeating yourself. Tell him ahead of time that you're no longer going to be doing those things.

That was done with my father. Magic. He started wearing his hearing aids. Nobody would speak louder, or repeat themselves. He couldn't take it.

My husband found out last week he needs hearing aids. We don't have the money. Tell your hubby that he is lucky he has them. Poverty sucks!

verilyverily Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> My husband found out last week he needs hearing
> aids. We don't have the money. Tell your hubby
> that he is lucky he has them. Poverty sucks!

-----------------------------------
I know.
I can't afford them either. So I just put up with people rolling their eyes and saying rude things behind my back.

Poverty sucks, especially when your getting old.

My mom recently passed away. I still have her $6K hearing aids, which she wore only a few times. Can I donate them anywhere to have the electronics reused?

YES I'd suggest donating them to someone here on exmormon....RfM.

I see a need here.

I can not understand why they are so expensive.....it's ridiculous.

Hearing and Seeing should be covered by medical insurance.....it would prevent other serious problems.

KJ

People can choke to death if they aren't able to chew their food adequately.

Kind of on the subject, I have to brag about DH. Many years ago, we were eating dinner in a nice restaurant when we heard a cry of distress from a nearby table: "Help, somebody, HELP! My wife is choking!" And indeed, the lady was beginning to slump into unconsciousness. DH rose so quickly that his chair fell over backward. He elbowed the husband out of the way, grabbed the slumping woman around the waist, and performed the Heimlich maneuver on her. A poorly chewed chunk of meat )as well as some other disgusting material) spewed out of her mouth. He held her upright as she began to breathe again. When she could stand again, she whispered to me, "Can you please walk me to the restroom? I'm shaking so hard I'm not sure I can walk on my own." So of course, I walked her back to the restroom.

And DH is nothing if not versatile. Recently, our 8-month-old kitten, who tends to just about inhale her food, got a kitten-kibble caught in her throat. She could still breathe, but she was obviously in distress, making odd noises and swiping at her throat with one paw. DH muttered, "Dammit, how do you do the Heimlich on a CAT?" He gave it his best shot, and sure enough, the troublesome kibble popped out of her mouth.

DH the hero!

This is why I only wear my hearing aids at work, where there's not a lot of background noise. As soon as I get home and on the weekend, I don't wear them. The background noise can drive you nuts.

Tell him that A. There isn't a damn thing wrong with having hearing loss and a hearing aid is nothing to be embarrassed about. And B. There are lots of people out there (I'm one of them) who have hearing loss and who cannot afford a hearing aid and who would really, really like to be able to hear things. He should count himself fortunate that he was able to GET a hearing aid and he should friggin' use it.

Or put it in a box and mail it to me.

Note: I make jokes out of all hearing loss misunderstandings. It's pretty funny, really, when I tell people what I thought I heard and then they tell me what they really said. Hilarity ensues. No need to get angry and blame other people for mumbling. That's just silly.

Second Note: I did this to myself. Too many metal concerts where I stood right in front of the stacks and too many Indy and motorcycle races since birth. Now I wear earplugs when I do either of those things, even though my friends make fun of me. "Hey, I'd like to preserve what hearing I have left because when I'm completely deaf, I won't be able to enjoy all this great music that has enhanced my life and made me a better person." And then I offer up a spare pair and am usually taken up on that.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/29/2014 08:37AM by dogzilla.

and had them adjusted for him.
Now one isn't working...........it's created a "lonely life" for him..............He's 96. He turns up his TV full blast.....I feel sorry for the neighbors............And visiting him is very frustrating......

He hears my brother much better than us daughters.

And our phone visits are tricky......he pretends to hear but if asked any questions, it's obvious he isn't hearing much.

What to do? Spend more $$ for new ones at his age? I'm thinking yes.......... first we will try to get the one repaired.

He doesn't appear to be very with it...when he can't hear.
Yet he's a smart man .... He seems to talk more than listen these days........
So it's frustrating..............

Good luck with your husband....

KJ/AnonyMs

It would depend. If they were custom fit, like mine are, donating them couldn't help.

Yes, my mom's hearing aids were custom fit. It is such a shame they can't be recycled.

I have moderate hearing loss. My doctor asked me when I really noticed the problem, and I said especially in two situations....1.at church, and 2. whenever my wife is speaking to me.

He thought about it for a bit, and then told me that he didn't see the point in getting hearing aids if those were the only times that I would need them.

My wife was not amused.

A while back I invested money in a crowdfunding campaign with a company called iHEAR. They are producing what I hope will be good hearing aids costing only $200 each.

They will be delivered before the end of the year. I will return and report.

Go to their website @ ihearmedical . Com and check it out.

I've purchased expensive Phonaks and cheaper ones from Able Planet, but I am hoping that these from iHEAR will be all they are promising...

Get a while erase board and write out all your messages.

Tell him you have laryngitis.

RMM

Hearing aids need to be adjusted several times. I have a mother that doesn't like to wear them because they make everything noisy. She never went to get them readjusted. As a result, it is very isolating for her to not understand what people are saying. It is hard for people who have become hard of heaering to adjust to having so much noise around when they are used to so much being filtered out. You could start by having him wear them in low-noise environments where there isn't a lot of extraneous background noise. It is sensory overload to have so much noise at once. Gradually expose him to other environments when he gets used to lower-sound ones. Also, an interesting fact...depending on the cause of his hearing loss, not wearing a hearing aid can actually cause further hearing loss because you are no longer stimulating the components responsible for hearing. Just like anything else, if you don't use it you lose it. So perhaps explaining to him that they aren't just an aid they can actually slow down the process of further hearing loss would motivate him. Sorry, parents are frustrating. Good luck.

There is always the option to learn sign language. It is rather inexpensive and engaging. There is a new world out there. Just saying.

K

Learning sign language does not help you with people who do not know it and still wish to communicate with you.

have you asked him what bothers him about his hearing aids? They can be uncomfortable to wear for long periods, or they might not be working well, or giving annoying feedback that he is sick of.

In 1990 when I was in my late 40s, I took a manufacturing job for a brief period. I learned from the required periodic hearing tests that I had high-frequency hearing loss. I did not perceive actual disablity at the time, but the situation gave me a point of reference on things to come.

As my parents aged, their relationship grew more contentious. One obvious reason for the discontent was because they couldn't understand each other due to hearing loss. So, their yelling was not only cathartic, it was necessary to enable communication. Meanwhile, the rest of the extended family became increasingly alienated because of the constant tension. Sons, in-laws, grandchildren, and long-time friends all had to make an effort to sustain contact with them as their hearing worsened. Neither of them perceived any of this as a problem, nor did either one ever agree to get a hearing test.

Fast forward past the turn of the century. I found myself struggling at work to hear people, craning my neck and cupping my ears to hear in meeting rooms, repeatedly asking people to speak louder, with the word, "huh?" becoming a regular part of my vocabulary. My partner began badgering me about getting my hearing tested. At some point I realized I was relying on him to hear for me on certain occasions. I had a stunning revelation along the way that the reason I didn't know the words to any songs, was because I couldn't understand sung words. And, I remembered my parents (passed-on by then) fighting all the time.

About 2006 I resolved not to be like my parents, and I went to our local university hospital and had a complete workup. That turned out to be overkill because my type of hearing loss is pretty common and very treatable with hearing aids, and a seeing a regular audiologist would have been sufficient. But having a complete workup did make me feel better nonetheless.

I got good advice from the doctor. She talked me out of in-the-ear hearing aids, pointing out that they block out most of the ambient sound, and your brain forgets how to process it. She said it is important for you to continue to hear normally as much as possible, so that meant getting over-the-ear hearing aids with sound tubes. So, I ended up with a very expensive pair of $6K over-the-ear babies, computerized to the max, which are very comfortable to wear, which automatically adjust to ambient noise, and which I've come to depend on very much.

I live in Seattle, where you may know the Seattle Symphony built Benaroya Hall in 1999. The acoustics in Benaroya are legendary, but I just didn't get it, and I thought maybe it was something I was just not capable of understanding. But my first concert with $6K hearing aids made me weep.

Hearing aids are not a perfect solution--even the expensive ones, but I would no more go anywhere without them than I would go without my glasses. Please, if you are suffering from hearing loss, you are also suffering from the psychology of hearing loss, as are your family and friends. Get tested.

My husband refuses to wear his $4000 garments

I am used to loud laughter and unholy practices and it really isn't a problem to me. He blames our lack of blessings on me. It is entertaining when tokens are divulged. We can all slit our throats. He is disappearing from the celestial kingdom with a smile and a shake of his head.

What can I do?


Ok, there. NOW it's about recovering from mormonism...

Hey guys! Hearing aids for low income on the way:

http://www.hearingloss.org/content/hearing-aids-and-affordable-care-act

Also, check community service clubs like Lions, Kiwanis, Soroptomists, etc. Lions provide free glasses and other clubs specialize in other disabilities. You might find one recycling hearing aids.

Best of luck


Kathleen Waters

Huh? What did you say?

I'm a fan of over-the-ear hearing aids too. The ones molded to your ear canal made me feel like I was underwater. Walking on a gravel path was CRUNCH CRUNCH CRUNCH!

Wearing hearing aids has also help my tinnitus in the sense that I'm completely unaware of it when I'm wearing my hearing aids.

Plus, I have started wearing my hearing aids all the time, even when I'm working in the dirt in the yard by myself because it really is a case of use it or lose it--and not just further hearing loss, but intellectual ability as well, because the deprivation of stimulation affects parts further up into the brain than just the hearing. So it's helpful in staving off dementia.

I agree that hearing aids are as much a part of good health as glasses if you need them and dentistry and should be available as part of general health care.

roomwithaview - Either myself or xanthippe will take them. My husband's been told that he needs the over the ear kind (not the in the ear kind). What kind do you have from our mom?