(sung to the tune of "The Battle Hymn of the Republic" a.k.a. "Glory, Glory Hallelujah")
Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause his dad will fix the game, Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause his dad will fix the game, Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause his dad will fix the game Jesus saves Jesus saves Jesus saves.
(chorus) Free Beer for all the ruggers, Free Beer for all the ruggers, Free Beer for all the ruggers, Jesus saves Jesus saves Jesus saves.
Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause he's only got twelve men Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause he's only got twelve men Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause he's only got twelve men Jesus saves Jesus saves Jesus saves.
(chorus)
Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause he's nailed to the cross Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause he's nailed to the cross Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause he's nailed to the cross Jesus saves Jesus saves Jesus saves.
(chorus)
Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause he's got holes in his hands Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause he's got holes in his hands Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause he's got holes in his hands Jesus saves Jesus saves Jesus saves.
(chorus)
Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause he's got holes in his feet Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause he's got holes in his feet Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause he's got holes in his feet Jesus saves Jesus saves Jesus saves.
(chorus)
Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause he's got some open wounds Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause he's got some open wounds Jesus can't play Rugby 'cause he's got some open wounds Jesus saves Jesus saves Jesus sa-ves.
(chorus)
Jesus we're only kidding, Jesus we're only kidding, Jesus we're only kidding, Jesus saves Jesus saves Jesus saves.