I need a couple of different comebacks for this one - from rude to polite, depending on who says it to me. I've had a couple of people say this to me and I never know how to respond. Some sweet little old ladies I want to be polite to but some of the ruder ward members I want to blow off.

Some of the ones I've thought of are:

I didn't realize we were friends at church.
Well, keep trying. Your aim is bound to improve.
Inactives are on to this one and we aren't buying it.
Well, maybe you should be nicer to people and people would want to be around you.
Yes, I've seen that the nicer people are leaving the church. It must be dreadful having to go to church with the type of people who stay.

Like I said - a variety of answers.

I had a so called friend in the ward who saw me at a baby shower. She came up to me and said "Oh, I've missed you!" (I knew she meant she hadn't seen me at church and that's what she really meant). My comeback? "Mary, I haven't moved." She stuttered and stammered and then said, "I am a bad neighbor" She knew she was busted. It was quite funny.

That's the best comeback of all.

why join misery loves company?

I can always talk to my wall and get more honest feedback.

It is refreshing to not listen to lies, gossip, and judgment on a Sunday. Now I find a myriad of activities that are building honest character.

Or how about this. If I want Lies, Gossip, and Judgment, I will turn on (Insert hated cable news channel here)

interesting since you never really seemed to care when I went.

"Brother Black, we've missed you in Elder's quorum."

"Really? What's my name?"

"..."

Hahaha! Did that really happen??

"Oh, I don't believe in that church anymore."

or

"Well I missed you at the lovely picnic we had in the park on Sunday. Wish you could have made it!"

My thinking on this has changed somewhat. People like familiarity even if they don't want to be close friends with you. So perhaps treat it in the same way you would if you ran into a former coworker or a member of a club that you used to belong to. Maybe something like, "Oh that's so sweet of you to say, but I really have moved on and am quite content with the direction my life has taken. What have you been up to lately?"

"You miss me? That's because I run serpentine! Serpentine!"


(with apologies to Peter Falk)

Answer: What do you mean? I'm there every Sunday. Why have you stopped speaking to me?

The one time the Relief Society sent me a "we miss you" post card was unfortunately for them, the one day I attended because of a missionary farewell. Just shows how little they really care if you are there when they don't notice the rare occasions you actually are there.

So what do you miss about me?

Crickets.....

Huh....You never even said hello when I went.
In fact, being ignored is the major reason I stopped going.

"Too bad for you, because I certainly don't miss going to church!"



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/26/2013 07:02PM by nickname.

Come with me.

Lol....love it.

"I wouldn't say I've been missing it, Bob."

Stupid TBM neighbor, "I haven't seen you at church lately."
Husband, "That's because I haven't been there."

Lol I did this one! I'm sitting down eating with a coworker. I see the guy and he comes over and says hi. After that he makes that comment. "I haven't seen you at church lately." My response, "It's because I haven't been in nine months." There was a pause and a confused look on his face so I continue chatting with my coworker. After he left my coworker, who knew about my atheism and recent leaving of church, and I had a good laugh. My Coworker made the comment the member was asking for that response with the way he came up and made the comment. Priceless memory.

Oh really?

What do I do for a living?
How old am I?
How many children do I have?
What kind of food do I like?
When was the last time you saw me at a meeting?

How can you miss me if you don't even know me?

That's because your aim is off.

You could just say "Thank you" and leave it at that. If it is someone you like, you can say it with a smile. If it is someone you want to be rude to, you can say Thank you then immediately turn and walk away.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/26/2013 10:15PM by evergreen.

...uh...I just can't bring myself to cleaning the toilets...

One woman told me how much she misses me and I told her I haven't gone anywhere, to which she replied you know what I mean. I said, yes I do and it doesn't feel very genuine because you could come to my home and visit if you really missed me. End of conversation and she has been very pleasant to me since with no more phony miss you comments.

I've pulled out my phone before and said, "My phones on all the time and I haven't missed any calls."
My wife was a little upset when I told that to someone once.

Tell you what. I'll come to your church if you come to mine. Deal?

"Excuse me, have we met?"

Or

"Who the hell are you?"

Or

"Oh, good, my plan is working."

Or

"Like I care."

"Oh good, my plan is working"

Im storing that one for my inevitable turn.... hahahaha

To be fair, some of these people would miss us. Chances are we are the ones who livened discussions, encouraged learning and thinking.
When we left it probably got reeeaaaallllly boring.
As for "I haven't moved" well that's duplicitous. How many threads here are about do not call contact love bomb or visit?
Granted, most of them are idiots, but sometimes people are just being polite. Sure we were friends, but in many instances there was quite a lot of shared experiences and water under the bridge.
The place would actually be better if a lot of us were there. Alas for them, no chance, so they are stuck with boring corelated manuals full of make believe and crap

Which church are you talking about?

I saw a lady from the ward that was my VT for 4 years. She called me by a name that wasn't mine. I told her she must be mistaking me for someone else. She looked so confused. Then she said "oh i'm sorry, you remind me of someone I use to know."

I'm still laughing about that one.

I had this same dilemma, over a 3 month period with 2 different ward members I saw in public. One was a sweet old woman I had no animosity towards [in a restaurant] I said to her " I've missed you too sister so & so but I had an undeniable prompting from the spirit not to attend a ward with such judgmental, condescending , busybody members."The look on her face was shocked. The second a few months later [ at Costco ] was a real douche EQ pres. he said "Haven't seen you at church lately " I was having a bad day and kind of lost it. I got eyeball to eyeball with him and said in a low voice " F*#k you and your moneygrubbing cult." He immediately turned on his heel and walked away. I never felt better,made my week