I've been listening to Mormon Stories on my way to work since discovering the site. JD has some good stuff and I'm definitely on board for support. I wouldn't call my story a "faith crisis", it's more like a "faith implosion" but that's another story. So I'm listening to the Brian Hales defense of polygamy...holy crap have you a heard this??? I'm not a scholar, just an old gumshoe but let me see if I got this...

Apparently Jammin' Joe Joe got the Polygamy revelation in 1831. Hales knows this because it's written in a friend of a friend's journal years later...solid proof I'd say. Anyway, Joe hates the fact that he has to do this so he keeps it secret.

Enter Fanny Alger. Beautiful new girl on the block and Joe hates that fact he's got to woo her, but orders are orders. So in 1834...God ramps it up and sends the unnamed angel with a sword down to tell Joe to get busy or I guess he's getting cut??? I don't know...Side note...who was the angel? Was it Moroni? You would think God would send him since Joe knows him, but moving on.

So when all the folks discover Joes relationship with Fannie and accuse him of adultery...Joe told them no. Keep in mind, no one still knows about the revelation because Joe hates the fact he has to do it. So Joe keeps telling everyone he didn't commit adultery and denies the affair with Fannie. Hales says is perfectly honest because they were married...win!!!

However, when JD points out that the honest thing would have been to tell them about the revelation, Hales disagrees and said Joe was perfectly ok in his actions...is this apologetics at its best? Hales defends the polyandry and everything.

Hales said polyandry was good because the women married their husbands before sealing was available. So really, this is good for them because if they marry Joe...it's automatic celestial glory...win!!! You see ladies the church really has your interests at heart so quit your whining about equality and all that crap!!!

Side note...at the time of the interview Hales was single. I can't believe there aren't women crawling all over him for these views...moving on...

Hales final thought was that in the celestial kingdom only about half the dudes will be polygamists because they just don't have enough women...reasonable logic I suppose. But didn't God create a lot of worlds? If he did, maybe he has a planet full of women that need exaltation??? Or maybe there's a celestial kingdom for each world??? Hmmm, I will continue to ponder....

If the point of polygamy is to make sure that all women get an eternal mate, does it seem odd that Joe seems to favor the young pretty ones? I mean, wouldn't those girls have been able to attract their own eternal companion? In the spirit of fairness he did marry some older gals, but neither Brodie, Bushman, or Palmer (the authors I've read) ever described these women as in desperate need of a hubby. In fact, Eliza R. Snow seemed to be quite sophisticated....hmmm again.

Anyway just wanted to share with my fellow godless apostates...have a great weekend!!!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/06/2014 08:42AM by muddyw1071.

Hales has a NEED to believe JS was a Prophet, that it's all true, and that there was nothing wrong with JS's conduct.

It's amazing how these 'defenders of the faith' try to justify JS sins. It actually speaks volumes about their own moral compasses.

Particularly in the early days of Utah territory and in Southern Utah - it was messed up. Sure, the LDS church is cult-like now, but it was definitely a cult in those early days (not allowing women to leave, forcing underage girls to marry, castration, etc.)

Polygamy may have been okay for some women - but the vast majority were single moms, struggling to feed their children. It seems to me, there is a reason that none/few of Heber C. Kimball's sons entered polygamy. They saw first hand what happened to their moms, and how they had to work extra hard as well.

FWIW, my issue is with patriarchal polygamy, with only one male, multiple women and women being commanded by the priesthood leadership to marry. I have no issues with consenting adults entering into non-traditional relationships (polyamory, polyandry, etc.)

Hey, great point about the "nameless angel"! What with JS being on a first name basis with the top-tier honchos in Heaven, you'd think he would find out who wielding that sword--because, you know, swords are what angels are all about; plus you'd think that if King James bible english is God's language, then his weaponry should at least be a well-crafted flintlock....

The correct sentence is Polygamy is good for men!!!

To count the ways:

1. Available sex with the young, innocent and beautiful.

2, Available sex with the young, innocent and beautiful.

3. Available sex with the young, innocent and beautiful.

and so on.

Let's see . . . Fanny Alger is sealed for eternity as a plural
wife to Joseph Smith in 1834, whereupon he takes her to the barn
for confirmation of the sealing and they are "spied upon"
through the door by Emma.

OK, so far so good, I can believe that.

April 3, 1836 Elijah appears in the Kirtland temple and
"restores" the sealing keys.

So it looks like JS was confirming a sealing, in that hayloft,
that would not be possible for two more years.