I find myself having a much more tolerant and accepting attitude on many things than I had as a tbm. It seems that the culture in general is hellbent on getting everyone to conform to some mormon prototype.

I was watching a reality singing competition (The Voice) on TV a few weeks back with some tbm in-laws and they couldn't stop negatively commenting on the outfits and fashion choices of contestants and judges alike. It wasn't just the "immodest" accusation (a tbm favorite) either.

Even after I had casually commented, to each his own, or different strokes for different folks to try to tactfully bring it to their attention, they continued to rail on the ridiculous clothing, sunglasses, style etc.

They literally couldn't help themselves. These are people that don't send their kids to public school because they don't believe in a one-size-fits-all approach to educating children with their different personalities etc, so it suprises me that they are so quick to be critical of individuality.

My kids were watching with us so at one point I paused the show and mentioned that people express themselves differently and that life shouldn't be a contest to see who can fit the mold best or an attempt to make everyone look and act the same.

Anybody else get frustrated with this mindset?

Yes & no - to being more judgemental.

Overall I am much more accepting - gays is a great example.

However, I'm more judgemental of Mormons. They frustrate me no end. How can they not see?!?!?

And yes I get frustrated with the TBM mindset you are referring to - which is a case of me being more judgemental...



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/10/2013 05:16PM by bc.

I live in a Fairly Liberal area- Western Wa.

I think the Mos have long disliked the 'Live & Let Live' attitude, and/but it seems to be Greatly Increasing, at least in the U.S. Canada.

I'm SURE they took the legalization of SSM & mj as defeats.

I had a gay husband after all. I could never come to terms with the idea that he was damned for being gay. There were some things he did that I had a hard time forgiving him for after he left me, but it had nothing to do with being gay.

What I find difficult is that I live my life in a way that I feel people should be able to live as they see fit and try not to judge. What I love is when they turn it on me. I support my TBM daughter in what she wishes to do--even going so far as helping her with her callings, buying her church clothes, buying her a smaller set of SCRIPTURES to take with her to Alaska--and she turns around and tells me how much better my life would be if I went back to church. (Mine was a big mess considering.)

Why can't people just let you be? Why are they always micromanaging every aspect of your life?

Actually I'm a lot LESS tolerant and accepting.

All of you need to change your lives COMPLETELY.

Contact me and I'll tell you how.

After you've taken my advice join me for a celebration in the jungle.

There will be refreshments.

Koolade, mainly.

Are they old? I have aged family members who do this constantly. TBM or not.

I'm trying very hard to become more accepting and less judgmental of people's boundaries and personalities.

I find myself becoming less tolerant of cruel and abusive practices; however, now that I'm building more clear boundaries for myself and trying to express them appropriately, I usually don't get as worked up as I used to about some of the s*** that goes down in my environment. I can blow it off, change it, or move myself to a different environment.

Very definitely. I thought I was a very tolerant and non-judgmental person, and maybe I was compared to a lot of Mormons I knew. But after I left, I realized that I hadn't been as tolerant as I'd thought.

The longer I'm away from the Church, the more I'm able to allow people to be who they are, rather than place high expectations on them.

I'm still a fairly old-fashioned sort of person, but I no longer judge people by my own standards. They're who they are and I'm fine with that.