I really need info on this, I think it may be normal, but the school my son attends tells me he has a problem. I have seen the drawings, and they are not bad just stuff I remember boys drawing when I was growing up. It is getting so bad at my sons school that I think I am either nuts or they are. I just need some info so I can better help my son. Thank you

Can you post some examples of his artwork? How old is he?

I don't remember that boys were judged by this criteria when I was growing up. My older brother had an army helmet and a uniform from a very young age. His Christmas gifts were always soldiers and tanks--as were my younger brothers. They were always playing army. I remember fake grenades and guns and even real stuff my mom got him at Smith and Edwards (in Utah).

I think schools are going a little nuts with this stuff. My 7-year-old son got in trouble for shooting air weapons at school (bow and arrow using his hands.) I seriously thought it was a joke when he told me that. He also draws battles with swords and guns, not obsessively.

If a kid that liked watching Science Fiction movies was drawing science fiction style drawings, I think it would be normal.

However, if the he repeatedly draws large fleets of spaceships attacking a human figure that looks a lot like a person in his life, then I would get a bit worried.

I have all boys, and I think the schools are crazy and hyper-vigilant about boys being boys. My son, who was 11 at the time got sent to the principal last year because he shot someone with his finger. I'm not even kidding! I asked, "Was it loaded?" Seriously? We are wasting time and money hassling kids about this?

Boys are always making guns out of sticks, legos, pretty much anything they can get their hands on. They play rough, they horse around, and do stupid things. I would be a bit more concerned if he's drawing gory pictures with people being killed and stuff like that. If it makes you feel, better, you can consult a therapist, but be very careful about the kind of therapist you choose. Some are slanted in an anti-boy direction.

Boys and girls are different, and boys should not be expected to sit in school and act like cute little girls do. That's what schools want now, and if boys don't act that way, they want you to medicate them. I've dealt with this years, and so far I have two grown sons who are good kids, law abiding, responsible, keep a job, and don't show any signs of that changing.

I tried forbidding guns during the 70's and the boys bit their toast into gun shapes and used their fingers behind my back.

"No, Mom, honest I was just pointing....."


Ridiculous.


Anagrammy

Yep, anything can become a weapon and the more you freak out about it, the more enticing it becomes. My boys go in the woods, make bows & arrows, and anything else they like. It's awesome to just let them grow up!

twojedis Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Yep, anything can become a weapon and the more you
> freak out about it, the more enticing it becomes.
> My boys go in the woods, make bows & arrows, and
> anything else they like. It's awesome to just let
> them grow up!

My three-year-old daughter once said, "I have a Khue khue." I
had no idea what she meant by a "Khue khue." She took a plastic
walrus toy, held it upside down so that the head and body of the
walrus was the handle of a gun and the tail of the walrus was
the barrel and said, mimicking shooting, "Khue khue!"

When I was an elementary-school kid in the 50s airplanes with
a string of bullets issuing forth and bombs dropping were
standard fare. Swastikas were common on the drawings too. I
wonder what would be made of that nowdays.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/15/2012 08:26PM by baura.

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaa! twojedis FTW!

My son started drawing dragons, swords, shields, lazer wepons, super hero types, all kinds of things like that when he was about 9.

He's now 29 and still draws. He has sketch books full. He's really quite good. I think he should take it further and do something with it.

Maybe sign him up for a drawing class, and get him some sketch books. Tell him he can draw away when he's home.

This is just from memory so I don't have a citation but in college I took a child psychology class and my professor told us this story:

One of her colleagues had two sons and the parents decided together that they would raise their sons without any toy weapons of any kind. No toy guns, or swords. No action figure toys. Nothing of the kind. They were careful about making sure their boys didn't watch violent cartoons or other shows. My professor said that they were incredibly diligent about this. Then one Christmas they bought them a little in house swing set type toy. The boys unwrapped it with excitement and the parents got busy putting it together. As they started reading the instructions the two boys each grabbed one of the pipes that made up the set and instantly started to sword fight with them. Moral of the story, this type of stuff is just in our nature. Now if it's too violent you should worry but chances are it's just flat out normal boy behavior.

Sounds pretty typicalto me. I remember one time (I was about 6) my older brothers held down a friend of mine and drew a knife dripping blood on his chest. After he had been home a bit his mom called mine all pissed off. She thought they had drawn a penis dripping semen. My mom was embarrassed that her sons were such poor artists, but really wondered where that ladies mind was.

I'd be more concerned that he held a kid down and drew anything on him against his will.

That's a little disturbing.

Hmmm, I agree that schools are getting a overboard with this stuff...Kids should be able to freely express themselves in art, boys and girls alike.

I concur with MJ, unless he's pointing out a specific person, I don't think it's too much to worry about.

Maybe sit down with him, have a large stack of paper and crayons, draw with him. Explain what you're drawing and why, then ask him to do the same thing. If he's afraid of something, maybe he'll tell you.

All the boys I knew, including my sons, drew guns, battles, superheroes, weapons. My husband who does not even kill bugs said he did too, as did my brother. None of them grew up to be the least bit violent. One has a great career using his art in computer graphic special effects for a major movie company.

Yes. It is normal. Especially if he's seen any Star Wars or sci fi stuff to base it on.

My kid drew knights on horses battling Darth Vader in a serialized action adventure series that he's still working on (and he is now 9).

Boys do this, all the time.

If it is extremely bloody or gory; if he writes words like kill, die, hate; it seems to be targeted at another kid or his teacher, etc or the person being killed or attacked looks like someone you or he knows; if his drawings went from puppies to this sort of thing rather suddenly, then yes, there may be a problem.

Can your son talk to a guidance counselor at school, with you present? If you have serious concerns, or the school requires such a thing, maybe start there?

Otherwise, I might tell them you think this is a normal phase lots of boys go thru. I mean, come on--how else do you think Ironman or The Walking Dead came to be?

because of something they drew or wrote. Creative kids do things that go WAY over the teacher's head. Please DO NOT make this child feel like there is something wrong with him.
This crap has to stop!

I remember drawing pictures like that during church when I was around 6-10 years old.

They were definitely inspired from TV and video games I spent most of my time absorbed in.

I don't know what this means for your son, but for me it just meant I was bored at church and my attention went to finding an outlet for daydreaming about what I did for fun.

Being bored at school isn't a new phenomena, but public school more than ever has no chance with competing with the kind of stimulation that computers and movies provide.

If your son is enjoying school and doing well, then why should the teachers or you be concerned?

If he is detached and always in his own world, maybe it's just a phase until he finds something at school that he finds engaging?

Almost all boys in my extended family are doing exactly the same thing. Your son is fine, and if you can even see what kind of weapons he's drawing then your son has more talent for art than any of the boys in my extended family.

I come from a long line of artists. Being an artist myself, I drew some pretty gruesome things when i was young and so did the rest of my siblings. We turned out just fine. The schools are overreacting. If your child is hurting or bullying people then that is when you need to get worried. But simply drawing pictures? Get over yourself.

What is abnormal, and harmful, is singling out your son and making him feel bad for doing it. The school is abusing your son.

Find out who is behind it and tell them to knock it off and apologize or you will publicize and sue.

Don't take the school's actions lightly.

It's entirely normal. The question is, what should he be doing instead? I always tell my students, either you are doing an assigned task or you are doing free reading (or some other educational activity.) My students are not allowed to draw during instructional time unless it's part of an assignment. So as a parent I would want to know if he is following classroom rules and procedures, because he really shouldn't have that much free time on his hands.

By the time I was eight I created entire fleets of ships out of American bricks. By eleven I had created whole armies including calculations of the cost of fortifications, salaries, ammunition, etc. I did not grow up in a military family but I found the calculations interesting. I had a letter to the editor published in 1958 or 59 on what to do in Vietnam. At MIT I studied defense policy and international negotiations among other things and had an article published on how to win the war in the beginning of 1966. I had examined our policies including how to fight in the jungles and found them destined for failure. Yes, boys are naturally drawn to weapons. They also learn to avoid them. They learn that war is hell.

There are plenty of people on this planet that doodle while people are talking to them. It actually helps some people listen better. I have always been one of those people.

Even when I was 40 and in college. The margins of my notes are filled with drawings.

Mia, what I've found is that some kids can multi-task, and many can't. I police all of the kids but I worry less about the multi-taskers.

Thank you, no he is not drawing anything that is singling anyone out. I thought it was normal, however everyone was very concerned about it. I even asked to see his file because I wanted to see if he has had any behavioral issues that I was not aware about.

I have a meeting in the morning with the school. Found out that DS bent a paper clip into a triangle and poked holes in his paper, the teacher then told me, that he poked a girl with it. I went to school with him today to make sure he said he was sorry even if he did it by accident he had to say he was sorry(I told him I know you would not do this on purpose, and from now on no bending of paperclips) After he said he was sorry the little girl said, Matthew you did not poke me with the paper clip at all. So either the girl is lied or the teacher lied, either way I have a meeting in the morning and am pretty much done with the school system out here.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/15/2012 08:33PM by eldorado.

eldorado Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I really need info on this, I think it may be
> normal, but the school my son attends tells me he
> has a problem. I have seen the drawings, and they
> are not bad just stuff I remember boys drawing
> when I was growing up. It is getting so bad at my
> sons school that I think I am either nuts or they
> are. I just need some info so I can better help my
> son. Thank you


I was constantly drawing big scenes of intergalactic warfare as a child. Lasers, rockets, explosions, and mayhem everywhere. I have fond memories of those simpler times. It's perfectly normal to use your imagination in such a manner. I wouldn't worry about it.

Thank you again to everyone, we do let him draw at home I just found the whole thing really odd. At least now I understand why he hates school so much.

Sorry if my posts are a hard to read, I am just really ticked off right now.I need to vent, so I can be ticked off but grounded at the meeting. The whole thing started off with pictures then ended up with lying teacher or little girl.

My son drew intricate, detailed battle scenes when he was little. He was artistic, but more to the point was patient and detail oriented, and put lots of planning into his creations. He wasn't a fighter as a child, and as a young man he's the most peaceful guy you could imagine.

I'm also a Grade One teacher, and I've seen plenty of battle type pictures from my male students. It's a pretty common theme.

Probably nothing to be concerned about, from what you've desribed.

We have 3 girls and one boy and have worked hard to avoid gender stereotypeing with them.
The result is that all our kids love games like Halo (the girls like the female character from R vs B)
And they all have nurf gun battles.
My son also watches My Little Pony and stuff with them and has his own favorite characters.
When it came to them playing/drawing battle stuff at school I just explained to them that some kids had brought guns to school and hurt/killed ppl before (we live in Co) and that some teachers may be a bit sensitive toward violent depictions and that they should be considerate of that when they choose what to draw/play at school.
So far so good.

Very good, I bet it does kids a lot more good to have something like that explained, rather than teaching them not to use their imaginations or something, or going off about schools just being crazy.

For the record, I totally drew things like that, coming up with characters and their weapons and powers. Definitely turned out to be non-violent.

Sirius Lee, my husband and I told him something similar tonight.So glad I grew up when I did.

I teach history in a junior high. Something I learned very quickly when I started teaching is that in general boys find weapons and military strategy really interesting and in general girls don't. I sometimes have the kids draw historical events. It's a good way for kids who struggle with writing to show that they understand the material. I always tell them if the weapons they draw are historically accurate (i.e. muskets, not machine guns, for the revolutionary war) and are done tastefully that I don't mind if they draw weapons. It's part of history.

Yep, boys: http://cheezburger.com/6760008960

I grew up playing with G.I. Joe and army men. We played cowboys & indians at school during recess. My father gave me a cap gun with the red rolled up tape that exploded like firecrackers. I also had a disc gun that shot those plastic discs.

My friends and I used to draw elaborate battle scenes with domed cities and space ships flying around shooting laser cannons at each other.

If this isn't normal, then I am seriously, seriously F'ed up!