My 19 year-old daughter, who resigned her membership at age 14, shared this story with me about her friend who made it home from Mexico this week. I have put it in bullet points to make it a quicker read.
- She was baptized at age 8 but was never active after parents divorced at a young age.
- She grew up living with her inactive, non-believing mother. Her father and his family are TBM.
- About a year ago at around age 19 she was love-bombed by the young adult singles ward and became active.
- She was pressured to go on a mission, and despite pleadings from her old friends, she decided to go.
- She was called to serve in Mexico but began to have doubts about wanting to go shortly after receiving her call.
- She finally went because of pressure from her father’s side of the family including a grandmother who told her that seeing her granddaughter become active and go on a mission was one of the greatest gifts she could have ever received.
- She went to Mexico and experienced a typical Mexico mission: poor living conditions, dirty water, etc.
- Less than two months into the mission she decided she wanted to come home.
- She told her mission president. He told her that if she went home she would bring shame to herself and to her family, she would be judged to be unworthy, and no one would want to marry her.
- She said that she wanted to go home anyway.
- She asked for her passport. He said he didn’t have it on hand, and that it was a process that would take some time to get it for her.
- He put her with two sister missionaries. With three of them in the companionship she could never be alone. He told them to keep an eye on her continually. She was to have no access to a phone, and she was never to be left alone. (This makes it sound like she was held hostage by her companions, but these sisters were nice and didn’t want to be in that uncomfortable situation either.)
- One day she finally grabbed a cell phone out of a companion’s hand and ran down the street. She called her mother and explained the situation.
- Her mother called the church office building and spoke to a woman who told her that the mission president was wrong and should not be doing that. This woman assured her that they would address the situation quickly.
- Instead of trusting the church to do something, the mother sent her daughter money for a plane ticket and a photocopy of her passport.
- She basically escaped, fled to the airport, bought a ticket and flew home. She arrived home a few days ago with only her mother knowing of her arrival.
- She posted on Facebook to let her friends and family know she was home. Her post on Facebook was as follows:
“My entire life can be described in one sentence: It did not go as planned, but that is okay. As of yesterday, I came home from my mission (and not because I am unworthy or not capable). I loved my short mission; I came to really know God and also myself. While I was in Mexico I started praying the most sincere prayers I have ever done in my life asking what His plan was for me and I received my answers in so many unique ways that a mission was not the plan for me. It was literally the hardest decision of my life but I truly felt that God has a different plan for me. I love the quote by Buddha saying, “In the end, only 3 things matter: How much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of the things not meant for you”. I feel so at peace with my decision even though I know it will be hard because of the inevitable judgments that are in store for me after this. I want all of you to know that I truly love God with all of my heart and I plan to serve him all my life but in different ways like in my family, career, and everyday life. Thank you so much for all of you that supported me in my mission. I love you all.”
- My daughter met her at their favorite coffee shop the day after she got home (three days ago), and needless to say, she is very happy to be home.
I hope to have this brave young lady over for dinner soon.

Brave, indeed!

I think she is on the right track. Send her my highest regards, as few people her age have such insight and wisdom.

Nice quote:

“In the end, only 3 things matter: How much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of the things not meant for you”.

If this story as posted is correct, the young woman should contact the nearest federal prosecutor to determine if charges can be filed against the mission president for stealing her passport, trying to force her to stay in Mexico against her will and human traficking.

Thank you for sharing such a heartwarming story pathdoc. I believe that young woman has great things ahead of her. Such poise and dignity!

;o)

Why didn't she go to the nearest US consulate? That's what you should do if you don't have your passport. She could have gotten te MP in a lot of trouble, which is what he deserved.

The passport belongs to the government, and the holder is its protector. It is illegal for anyone else to take it from the holder. This is what human traffickers do. Are mission presidents human traffickers? One might well ask.

Great question cludgie.

I think on a scale of bad to worst, they would probably be at the "bad" end, but I think that in some cases lines are definitely being crossed and the church needs to be called on it.

SG

I personally think each missionary that goes on a foreign mission needs to REFUSE to hand their passport over.
Give THEM a copy of the passport for their records. One should NEVER relinquish it to anyone other than a border patrol official for a stamp.

Missionaries should say, "I have been a responsible adult and will maintain MY identifying documents. You do not need these and I am here of my own free will and I will leave on my own free will, are we clear?".

RMM

Agreed. Do parents make teenagers hand over their driver's licenses for fear of them losing them? No. Then why missionaries? It's only to take away their freedom of choice, since there ARE options for replacements if lost.

If those kids had the ability to do that (above^), they probably would have enough sense not to go on the mission in the first place. They are brainwashed and coerced; it wouldn't occur to them to give the MP a COPY of their passports and retain the original.

I can't image them letting her on the plane or across the border with photocopy of a passport. Seems fishy to me.

Yeah, she flew out of Mexico on nothing but a photocopy of a passport....Homeland Security would 'totally' accept that, no questions asked.

Just say you are coming to the US because Obama will take care of you and no passport is needed.

This demonstrates the mind control the LDS cult has over it's membership. All missions are about is to get young people at a crucial time in their lives where they tend to go out on their own and discover themselves stuck in a smothering 24/7 indoctrination program.

A General Authority admitted to me once missions were about retaining the young men in the church more than they were about bringing new converts in. In fact, the GA told me most new converts go inactive.

Most the money that comes into the church coffers comes from North America. All those missions around the world are just for bragging rights and places to send the children from North America to for two years to brainwash them some more and get them dumb and horny so they marry a mormon girl soon when they get home.

What these young people need to get through their heads is they are volunteers. They can leave at any time and if the church tries to stop them or takes their passport, then that's being held against your will and it's a criminal act. The church does not have the right. They just want to brainwash you into thinking it does.

^^^^ This is HUGE. It completely changes my whole idea of mission work. Duh. Duh. Duh. I can't believe I never figured it out before.

A copy of your passport helps.

As a clueless nonmo, I have a couple of questions or thoughts on this. Mormons say that serving missions are voluntary and you can leave if you want.

"- She said that she wanted to go home anyway.
- She asked for her passport. He said he didn’t have it on hand, and that it was a process that would take some time to get it for her."

For missionaries in this position in a foreign country and they can't get their passport back. Aren't foreign missionaries suppose to register w/the US embassy, consulate, or basically let the US know that they are doing a "charitable" mission abroad and they are out of the country? If this is the case, then in an extreme cases like this, can't missionaries go to the US embassy, consulate and let them know that they want to go back to the US? I traveled to Korea once and had to let the US know and ask for permission from Korea to go there (business)

Yes, that's how it's done. But they no longer can make a passport for you in the consular section. Now they only come from DC. So they can issue you a passport waiver if they have the right information. They can also call the mission office for you and demand delivery of the missionary's passport.

Actually, in all countries where you are a foreigner, you are required to carry your passport on your person at all times. Authorities do not have to accept a copy, but often they'll let you slide. And if you do have a work permit, it's only good so long as it is included with the passport. Why? Because the visa foil verifying your status is glued to the inside of your passport.

What the missions do is highly illegal and very unethical. But it happens because the young kids are too wet behind the ears and and the mission office can take easy advantage of them. If a missionary just said "no," there wouldn't be anything that the mission president could do, short of bullying him or her.

Sorry, wrong place.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/16/2014 01:36PM by silvergirl.

I once flew to/from Mexico (1999, so pre-9/11) without any ID. I was packing in semi darkness, tossed my passport wallet into the duffel, without noticing it hit the side of the bag and landed on my bed. When I got to airport, discovered I had only the ticket plus a spare ATM card in my glovebox.

It was still possible to travel to Mexico on an affidavit of citizenship, which had to be signed by two witnesses (my travel companions). They began requiring ID at security in 1996, after the TWA 800 disaster (at first thought to be an act of terrorism, but not so), but somehow security let me through with the affidavit, as did Mexican immigration at the Los Cabos Airport.

The first thing I did upon hotel check in was head to the US Consulate. Since I had a valid passport, they looked me up in their database and said they could generate a one-day travel document to get me back home. I showed my airline ticket as "proof" that I had return travel plans. The ATM card was accepted as "proof of ID"* I had to go to a photo shop to get an ID photo taken, then went back to the Consulate.

They generated a document with my name/DOB/citizenship, with my photo attached/stamped/embossed with seal. The document stated that it was valid for travel on that day only, on my airline/flight/destination only, and that it expired the day after return travel. No one batted an eye either at Los Cabos Airport at check in or upon arrival in San Diego. The airline and immigration personnel acted as if such documents are routine.

I don't know whether such documents are valid for return from countries other than Mexico or Canada. I do know that it is helpful to have copies of your passport stashed in your luggage (I also scan mine and upload to cloud storage, so I can print a copy abroad if needed). If they no longer replace passports at Consulates, then they must still honor the travel documents, because people have wallets lost or stolen all the time.

*I suspect the "real" proof of ID was being able to supply all the info that matched my passport: DOB, place of birth, month/year of passport issue, hair/eye color (no longer listed on passports, but the info was collected for my first 1973 passport and they have it on file).

There are many different kinds of situations in many different kinds of countries. And things aren't as they were in 1999. In 2002 I walked in to the US Consulate in Frankfurt and they replaced my passport in about 15-20 minutes. They no longer do that because the rules have changed. And losing your travel documents in Germany will certainly be a different experience than losing them in, say, Chile or Ecuador.

Another thing to remember is that these kids are there on some sort of visa and for 16 to 22 months. That makes a big difference, too.

Were you there (Frankfurt) as a tourist or as a missionary trying to return home earlier with the MP holding your passport?

I was staying there long term, and my tourist passport was about to expire.

The photocopy of the passport is used to reissue it basically straight away. Always have a couple of photocopies kept in different places for just that purpose. The Army always used to hold photocopies of our passports when we deployed, it beggars belief why the church would not do that instead of illegally taking passports.

I carry copies as you suggested, plus I upload a scan to cloud storage.

As spanner says, with a photocopy you can easily get your passport reissued. You can do this even without a photocopy. My son lives overseas and has lost his more than once.

good for her. I hope she's learned something about cultish behavior..

I was told that it was MANDATORY to carry my passport at all times. I did, of course, and I was occasionally asked for it, mainly when I cashed travelers' checks (back in the days before ATM's.)

I'm not sure about now, but back then, the Dept. of State told people to ALWAYS keep their passports on them.

You're right. It's mandatory.

We've had a number of stories on this board over the years from former missionaries who got into a great deal of trouble with foreign government officials for not having their passports on them. I know it's hard for young people to say a firm, "NO" to a Mission President in terms of handing over a passport. But it is my strong recommendation that you hand the MP a photocopy of your passport and keep the original on you. Foreign governments fully expect that you will carry your passport at all times. Every time I have traveled in a foreign country, my passport has constantly been with me. You simply never know when a police officer will ask to see it.

with summer amen 100%

I remember a sacrament meeting where a former Mission President was talking about how he withheld a passport from young man that had come to him asking to go home. He told it like "not so fast young man, I have the upper hand here, and God wants you to stay!" and the congregation all chuckled.

It was a huge WTF moment for me.

This guy had not only admitted to illegal (not to mention irresponsible and dickish) behavior...but everyone just took it in stride...laughing even.

WAKE UP PEOPLE!!!

SG

I am guessing she went to the consulate and got a replacement or alternative documentation. It is pretty easy.

Before it was shut down, the Colorado MP wife's blog had several stories of missionaries wanting to leave and even running away. They were also put with "handlers."

Did this blog ever come back?

Their parents should have told them to keep their own passports with them at all times and under no circumstances give it to anyone,mission president or not.

It is very hard to say no to something when everybody else is doing it.

I agree. Sometimes parents are also clueless and obedient.

The church has some outrageous rules for missionaries.

Keeping a passport for safekeeping is one of them. Apparently they do it to keep it from being stolen or lost. Pickpockets are amazingly clever in some of the countries.

Engaging in nefarious tactics to force a missionary to stay that wants to go home needs to stop and be reported.

They ignore their own regulations.

They wouldn't pull any of those tactics with senior missionaries.

Sorry the young woman had so much trouble getting home.

Link to the follow up on this.
http://exmormon.org/phorum/read.php?2,1418656,1418656#msg-1418656