Hello everyone,

I wrote a quick post yesterday about some of the body-shame I learned growing up as a Mormon girl. (Modesty and the idea that our dress habits could provoke the men) It seems to have struck a nerve with a lot of people and I would like to lengthen the post. One of the areas I would like to add is Spencer W Kimball's teachings about rape victims, that it is better for a woman to die than to give up her virtue without a fight. But I don't have a copy of the book. I am trying to find an online version (I really don't want to pay for the book, especially knowing the money will be going straight to the Morg) Does anyone have a copy, that could give me the reference and exact quote? Or know of a site where I could get the PDF of the book? I tried Kobo, they said they had a copy, but they didn't really. I just need a valid reference, one that isn't a second-hand source.

Here is the link to my post - I wrote it very quickly and I was very surprised at the reaction it has gotten - I do think that if I expand and edit a bit more, I could really come up with something that speaks to a much larger audience and that helps other non-Mormons understand a little bit more about what Mormon women have to go through.

http://postmormongirl.blogspot.com/2012/08/mormon-modesty.html

Thank you,
PMG

You might want to look at this.

http://www.rolereboot.org/life/details/2012-03-how-modesty-made-me-fat

Oh wow - that is heart-breaking. I guess this isn't just a Mormon problem. And I do identify a lot with her - I feel so ashamed sometimes. As if I want to be invisible. Maybe that's the Mormon in me, maybe that was just my particular family but it's a hard mindset to get out of.

24th, Printing 1994

Chapter 5 page 63:

"How can one believe deeply in God and his scriptures and yield to unchastity? It is wholly wrong. David O. Mckay has pleaded:

'...Your virtue is worth more than your life. Please, young folk, preserve your virtue even if you lose your lives. Do not tamper with sin...do not permit yourselves to be led into temptation. Conduct yourselves seemly and with due regard, particularly you young boys, to the sanctity of womanhood. Do not pollute it.'"

"Our young people should know that their partners in sin will not love or respect them if they have freedom in fondling their bodies. Such a practice destroys respect, not only for the other person but for the self. It destroys the ultimate respect for virtue. And it ignores the oft-repeated prophetic warning that one should give his or her life rather than yield to loss of virtue."

"Also far-reaching is the effect of loss of chastity. Once given or taken or stolen it can never be regained. Even in a forced contact such as rape or incest, the injured one is greatly outraged. If she has not cooperated and contributed to the foul deed, she is of course in a more favorable position. There is no condemnation where there is no voluntary participation. It is better to die in defending one's virtue than to live having lost it without a struggle."

And that snippet right there is a recipe for disaster.
Suicidal ideation, sexual disorders, mental illness, ptsd......

How many tbm folks, especially young girls,
have considered, attempted, or succeeded in ending their lives
because of this perniciously evil book?

I will bet the number is staggering.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/09/2012 01:17PM by ambivalent exmo.

“Also far-reaching is the effect of loss of chastity. Once given or taken or stolen it can never be regained. Even in a forced contact such as rape or incest, the injured one is greatly outraged. If she has not cooperated and contributed to the foul deed, she is of course in a more favorable position. There is no condemnation when there is no voluntary participation. It is better to die in defending one’s virtue than to live having lost it without a struggle.”

-- Spencer W. Kimball, "The Miracle of Forgiveness," p. 196