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"...it would be better that I was dead than leaving the church"

That is a statement of her "perceived" priorities: The Church rules above all else, family, friends -- everything! You as a daughter only exist to serve her religious conceits. And the Church's conceits. You have no reason to exist otherwise.

You have no value but to reinforce the Church and her religious needs.

She may not have realized just how much she was saying with that statement. It may have come out of shock alone. Let's hope. That's why I used the word "perceived". She needs a chance to reconsider what she has actually said. You should let her know how serious such a statement is.

It is that kind of mentality that contributes to Utah's high suicide rates in certain age groups (RFM had a post on this statistic a few months ago, I wish I had the link).

Would she really ever give you the choice of becoming active again -- or committing suicide? Put that way, she would certainly have to say "No!" If so, then she must stop using that kind of language around you -- and especially around your children!

Mormons - mostly young and vulnerable members - actually have been known to kill themselves in this kind of emotionalized e

There are actually many parents of LGBT youth that drive their kids to suicide by sticking to TSCC's party line. Many come around after their kids are dead realizing that they would indeed rather have them alive then "pure."



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/20/2012 12:47PM by Xyandro.

"...it would be better that I was dead than leaving the church" ...

...is exactly and precisely the reason I have made it a policy for the last 30 years to not play nice with the Mormies. What kind of fucked-up tool says that to their child?

When you are up against a cult that only plays hardball, you'd better know how to play hardball right back at them or you're going to get hurt.

My TBM sister recently referred to her gay son and "his problem". I wanted, and wished I would have, to tell her he is fine, and has no "problem". The kid is bright, funny, fun to be with, and is loved by everybody that knows him. He has no "problem". He is what he is. It is unique in many ways and beautiful.

"and if I try hard enough I'll know it is true too."

This sounds like one of those testimonies you hear every once in a while where the person says that they never really had a test monkey and needed one badly. So they just stuck to it and did everything they should and eventually they came to realize that they really did have a real life test monkey.

When it comes to actual belief, I would doubt that the speaker knows for themselves the difference between "faking it 'til you make it", and actually having it. Like the line from "Momentary Lack of Reason" - was it love, or the idea of being in love.

But in the end, moms are like that and as one poster said here a long time ago, moms know how to push your buttons because they installed them.

I've been EMS for 30 years. When someone tells me they wish they were dead or threatens suicide, we take that really seriously.

I don't know if your child leaving the morg is enough for her to really try to kill herself. However, I would call a crisis line and discuss it with them

If she isn't planning on hurting herself or others and she gets put on a 72 hour hold, they will interview her and, usually, let her go if they think she isn't a threat...