One thing I don't get are LDS singles. I'm talking over 40s, active Mormons who have never married. I have 4 TBM friends like that I don't get how they keep going.

First of all, they have been relegated back to family wards, even though their actual families live far away. They have to sit in RS and EQ with all these married folks who talk about their kids and grandkids. I hated that when I in my 20s on those rare visits home. I couldn't imagine being permanently stuck as a 1-person "family" in a family ward.

Second, they never get high office. They are always SS teacher or ward clerks. Never marrieds are not considered fully mature until they graduate to married status. Three of them are RMs but they are still treated like they are young adults who just happen not to be young.

All 3 have masters degrees and professional jobs. They constantly post on FB about how great the church is, but the church has no real place for them.

I guess I wonder why they can't figure out it's BS. If they stopped going, not many people would really care and the church has already written them off. Maybe they just use the sunken costs argument, but they still have half their lives to live and service as a 2nd class citizen seems little fun to me.

It's like a growing kid who is trying desperately to still play with their action figures and have a vivid imagination. All the while, each day the toys become a little less fascinating, but they have to try and grasp on anyway because that is what is familiar that is what was done.

It's just that the toys are replaced with the church. They may have evidence of the loss of the illusion, but they are going to hold onto the sinking ship anyway.

My brother does go. He is in his 40s, but he is somewhat mentally and physically disabled. It has been good for him to have this especially after my parents died. He lives in my parents' home and the ward has been really good to him. They help make it possible for him to live independently.

BUT for others??? They are always talked down to as though they are less than or that something is wrong with them.

When I knew my marriage was falling apart, there was no way in hell I was staying in as a single mother. I had one lady come by and tell me that if I'd just get my divorce, she'd invite me to single adult activities. I told her no way in hell I wanted to go to those things.

The church is washed up and it wants others to be washed up and/ or pay up ("family"), riches, tithes, worships TSCC. It doesn't understand or care for single people because it doesn't understand itself. It wants singles to sit on the back row and in fact be practically invisible.

A friend from grad school who works for the State Dept. posted pictures from her trip to Utah about the beauty of the LDS temple architecture.

I started this thread because I was thinking, "You have been stationed in Greece and lived there for a couple of years, and yet you still feel obligated to about how pretty temples are???"

How can you be in your mid-40s, never married, have a masters degree great career, and still think that LDS temples are something special?

I'm 44, never married, have a bachelors, and I still dig the temples. i can totally see where your friend is coming from.

I don't go to church anymore, understanding the fraud. But if I did, I would be back in a family ward and facing just the dilemma you describle. Bet even when I was active Mo in my late twenties and still going to the singles ward, I was already beginning to feel out of place because most of the ward was 18-22 yrs. Seemed like kids to me.

Mormons (young singles and many [young] couples) are (raised to be) immature. In my thirties, I went to 1 singles activity and was the only mature person there (but then again, I've been around and done things and I am an originator), along with a bunch of hormone crazed young fools. That was the dumbest night I've ever experienced.

Singles have no place in the Mormon church. Even Joseph wanted to be surrounded by multitudes of [otherwise single] women, secretive usually. Singles have been punished in and by the church every since.

I don't see it. I never went to singles ward and that was by choice. Family wards were a better fit for me.

Also, ward clerk is the best job there is. You spend about 20 minutes counting tithing, do a little data entry and bam you're done. No need to talk to anyone or wory that you're not magnifying your calling. It's simple.

Yep being 40 and never married in the surch sucks. Never been on a miss or getting a decent calling. Once had the duty for 2 yrs in the singles branch to clean up the rooms and take out the trash. Very diligent at it till I got really burnt out of seeing all my friends get dates and married off and their families grow. Very discourging. Later down the road i lied to the bishop and confess later. Got counseled and disfellowship. Got past those issues. But haven't looked back. Still inactive as it gets.

The truth is the LDS church does not want you unless you are married, have young children and pay tithing. If you are single, older (over 50), have no children, gay or any other status other than married with children then you are not really welcomed at TSCC. Why do you go if your not welcomed? Over 1/3 of the church is single and you do not see them at church. Why - because TSCC goes out of their way to not welcomed them. Same thing with gays and singles.

See now that's not what Ole Joe did. He went after single women.