Looking for suggestions on asking to be released/removed from HT/VT lists.

With the church teaching to be honest in my dealings with my fellow men I feel I can no longer teach in Sunday school.

I want to ask that we be released/removed gently, without fear of church discipline or having to answer too many questions from SS president or bishop.

I don't want to lie, but I do want to avoid the real reasons, for now. How do you avoid starting rumors about sinning as a reason?

Any suggestions?

From their perspective, you are sinning. Quitting your calling is a sin because you covenanted in the temple to consecrate your time, talents, and everything you have to the building up of the kingdom. Questioning the authority of church leaders is a sin. Looking at anti-Mormon material or affiliating with apostates are sins. You can't prevent gossip and rumors anyway, no matter what you do. They have to come up with an explanation for why you left that keeps other members from following you. If you don't give them an explanation, they have to make one up.
You want to leave quietly without anyone spreading rumors about you. I think you have to choose one or the other - leave quietly and ignore the rumors, or be vocal about telling everyone why you're leaving so that there's no question.

How about doing it in casually writing and not including an explanation:

Email or note under door:

"Just a quick note to let you know that my wife and I will be unavailable for home or visiting teaching for the foreseeable future. I'll let you know when we are ready to resume. Thanks---(you)."

If he asks you why, act surprised and say, "personal reasons-- I'm sure you can understand that."

If he presses further, just say, "personal means private reasons-- you do understand the word 'private' don't you?

Mormons are used to being "notified" but not used to people "quitting." It's good practice for you to start withdrawing the permission Mormon bishops seem to feel they have to pry.

I am sure you read that checklist published on this board--the list of personal details about your family that the bishop wanted their "teacher" spies to inform on. My word!


Anagrammy

supposed to be after Dave the Atheist



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/26/2012 08:41PM by anagrammy.

Say "you are going through a difficult time and need to work things out. Please do not ask me about this--I have to work it out all by myself. Please respect my wishes for now--it is very important to me"

Depending on the EQP or Bishop, you will get a different response.

I think you have to be willing to do what is right for you *regardless* of what may happen.

And then set things up as carefully as possible to make things go smoothly.

But when you ask to be released and to stop HT, they ARE going to start speculating. You probably ARE going to be discussed in meetings. It's just a fact of Mormon life.

I think the best you can do is to tell the bishop that you need some time/space to sort a few things out and that you need to be released from your callings and from being visited. You'll contact THEM when you are ready [when meaning NEVER].

Request his respect of your personal privacy (specifically mention not being discussed in meetings). This is something YOU have to figure out and you don't need outside pressure or judgement. I like what sam said, because it's FIRM and clear.

Fred you have many options:

1) Become inactive
2) Resign SLC letter
3) Grin and bear it
4) Talk to bishop

I can go on, easiest is #2. Ignore all advances calls, emails, etc...

They have no power over you. Don't let their mind games work on you.