Date: March 02, 2011 10:51PM
During tithing settlement each person is given an Individual Ordinances Summary to look over and make sure the information is up to date. I have one from 2004. It lists my name, bday, address, ordinances dates, name of my then-husband, etc. Also on there are my parents names. The birth date and church record number for my father are there (even though he's been inactive for decades.) For my mother, the spaces for her bday and record number are blank. She left the church years ago and she apparently resigned because there is no record number for her.
The information for my children is also on there.
When your parents go in for tithing settlement, they'll be given a summary to look over. The space for your church record number will be blank. If they notice it and ask about it, they'll find out that you're no longer a church member.
Date: March 03, 2011 02:48PM
So, they are circumventing any confidentiality they promised to someone resigning, or that is required by law?
"I am not allowed to tell you the status of your children in this church. Oh, wait. Here's this form, look it over CAREFULLY, please." wink wink
You've told them to leave you alone. You mean business. They can get in trouble if they keep making contact with you. They let your parents know, on purpose, so your parents harass you into coming back into the fold. The goal is to keep you coming back, so they can keep your tithing money.
Isn't that extortion? If not, is what they're doing ethical?
Do they tell you this will happen beforehand, or is likely to, when you resign? Do they explain it in terms you can easily understand?
If you ask them if they will keep the matter of your resigning confidential, do they say yes, or promise yes?
When did they start doing this? Recently, or has it always been this way?
I must admit I am both fascinated and appalled by this at the same time.