I have cherry picked (cut & paste) some of her less flattering comments about the missionaries. She bitches a lot, goes on and on and over shares. IMO, I think the way these missionaries are being treated borders on abuse and I am sickened about all the antidepressants pushed on these kids.


"Hi Everyone, Wow! We just had the week that Mission Presidents only have nightmares about. Right in the midst of several conferences on the Western Slope that we were really looking forward to, we had two runaway missionaries. An Elder in Denver took off on foot with his luggage. I am not sure where he thought he was going to go without any transportation or money but he was gone for a few hours. Someone spotted him in the park and called the nearest missionaries who tried to talk to him. He would not talk to them and just told them to go away. Next thing we knew, he disappeared again without the luggage, he just left it in the park. They finally found him in the nearest church, Praying! After much persuasion, our Assistants were able to talk him into going back to his apartment and they stayed with him all night. His companion was with some other Elders all night. We were 4 and a half hours away in Grand Junction. What a helpless feeling that was! We were so relieved around 11:30 that night that he was safe.

The next morning, we were preparing to go to a conference for some of our Sister Missionaries when that same Elder called us and said that he was going home. He was adamant about it. All of this was so shocking because this Elder is one of our best missionaries. He has been very obedient and diligent and effective. He has also changed the lives of all of his companions. We need this Elder to stay and of course, the Lord needs him to stay.

That same morning, one of our Sister Leader Trainers, who was supposed to be in charge of the conference was so sick that I had to take her to and urgent care center. We were there for 5 1/2 hours. While we were there, Blake called me to tell me that one of our Sister Missionaries had run away and left a note for her companions (she was in a threesome) saying that she loved them but it was time for her to leave. She only took her purse and small bag with a notebook with her. I felt like he had just kicked me in the stomach. She was serving in a very small town where everyone knows each other and everyone was looking for her including the police. We were just sick inside. We hurried and ate and prayed and called her mother to tell her (that was the hardest phone call ever) and then we ended up leaving right after the conference and driving to Denver to talk to our run away Elder that night. After the Sister had been missing for about nine hours, they found her. As soon as I heard, I just started crying with relief.

One of the biggest problems that we have in the mission is the mental health of our missionaries. Missions are stressful and if there are any tendencies for mental illness, it will come out in the mission field. And when they are suffering, we suffer with them. We love them! Winter scares me because I know that it is only going to get worse as the days get darker. We are keeping the LDS Family services busy and we are so grateful that we have their services here.

I received a phone call from one of our new sisters and the minute she started talking to me, she started crying. My heart broke immediately. It really is just like when one of your own children is hurting over something. I asked her what was wrong and she said that she was feeling so homesick and sad and had a terrible stomach ache every day and that even though she had gone to college for two years before her mission and been away from home, she had never felt like this before. I told her that when President Murdock got home, we would call her and he would give her a blessing.

After we ate dinner, we called her and she and her companion came over. We talked with them and Blake shared with her the letter that I sent you, {redacted}. She loved the letter. I talked with her companion and then she received a priesthood blessing. She seemed much happier when they left. We saw her again yesterday and she was 100% better. She is so cute and she will be such a great asset to this mission. Her companion is fantastic too. We love them so much. We love all of our missionaries so much.

The third Elder had recently started on an antidepressant that had the
rare side effect of causing deeper depression and suicidal thoughts.
We had him come over to our house immediately. I happen to have the
Dr.'s cell phone number and texted him on Sunday night to ask if I
could call him. He was kind enough to respond and he was able to
squeeze him in on Monday morning. Blake took the Elders to the
Airport while I took the other Elder to the Dr. He switched his
medicine up completely and now we are fervently praying that the bad
one will hurry and get out of his system and the good one will start
working soon. In the mean time he has been living with us.


We went home and fixed dinner and then a couple of our Sisters came over after their church ended. They had called on Saturday and one of them had just had a panic attack and they were both so stressed out. We talked with them for over an hour and gave one of them MOQ which is a series of question determining depression and anxiety. Blake gave her a blessing and then we fed them and then they left. They had not been gone longer than 30 minutes when they called and felt like the other Sister needed to talk to us in more depth. We told them to come back.

We then talked to the other Sister, gave her the MOQ and Blake gave her a blessing. While they were still there, some Elders dropped by to talk to us about one of their new investigators who claims to be responsible for the deaths of 8 people. He did not clarify that. They said that he was a referral from a member and they taught him in the member's home. They said that he seemed very sincere and had a great desire to know truth. We just told them to always teach him with the member and to follow the spirit. By this time, it was 9 o'clock. I called one more Sister to give her the MOQ. That was the 4th one that day. The darker and colder it gets, the more our missionaries struggle with depression. It worries me greatly. Many of them never had problems before now. Missions are stressful! And missions are wonderful. We love being here and we love being able to share this great message with the people here in Colorado. We know that we are so blessed by this wonderful opportunity. We love our missionaries and we love all of you and appreciate all of the prayers that are said on our behalf. Until next week….we love you!"

I do not understand why there is so much mental illness. It just plagues too many of our missionaries and then it affects all of their companions too. Every time my phone rings, I almost dread answering for fear that it is another missionary with stress, anxiety, or depression and so many times it manifests itself in physical illnesses. I know that we are not the only mission that is seeing this and way too many kids are having to go home. I would have never guessed that we would be dealing with this to this extent

I picked up Blake at the house and we went to visit some Elders at their home. One of these Elders has been suffering from depression his whole mission (he has been out a year) and most of his teenage years. He has been telling us that he just wants to go home for about a month now. We finally got him talked into going to a doctor to get some medication but he has this great worry about side affects. He did start on some medication on wednesday night and said that it made him very irritable the next day. He took it again on Thursday night and again he felt very irritable all the next day. I called the Dr and told him about the irritability and he said that would be extremely rare but not impossible so he change the meds. When I called the Elder to tell him that we were changing the medication, he refused to even pick it up from the pharmacy and said that he just wants to go home. That is why we went to see him. After much pleading and expressing to him how much we love him and begging him to try this new medicine, we finally talked him into thinking and praying about coming to live at the mission home for the rest of the transfer and giving the medicine a chance to work. Blake then gave him a blessing and we went home."

They pursue these "runaway missionaries" like they're runaway slaves, which I suppose is consistent with the way they're treated in every other aspect of the mission.

I hate that she repeated the myth that antidepressants can sometimes cause deeper depression and suicidality. That is not even close to what is happening. Very deep depression actually protects against suicidal thinking because the person doesn't have the energy to plan and carry out a suicide. Suicidal thinking can emerge as an antidepressant begins to work and the patient shakes off the apathy of severe depression. Oddly enough, the appearance of suicidal thinking is a sign of progress. If the patient stays on the medicine, he will continue to improve in most cases.

Stark evidence of what a m-f a Mormon mission is. Need to get all those depressed mentally ill missionaries fixed up so they can get out there and share the great plan of happiness/sarc

This makes me furious!!!!

It sounds like no family members are ever brought in on the situation.

Do the parents even know that any of this is happening?

And you know how the church handles these problems? They "raise the bar" so they can blame the victims for not being mentally prepared to serve a mission rather than take responsibility for their sick program of isolating these kids from their support networks and families and force them into an unhealthy lifestyle where they are blamed when they can't sell the church's crappy product. They don't get any alone time or time to just be normal...always about the mission.

This is a recipe for exacerbating existing depression and causing new cases of depression where there weren't before.

Did I mention this makes me furious?!?!

SG

silvergirl Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> This makes me furious!!!!
>
> It sounds like no family members are ever brought
> in on the situation.
>
> Do the parents even know that any of this is
> happening?
>
> And you know how the church handles these
> problems? They "raise the bar" so they can blame
> the victims for not being mentally prepared to
> serve a mission rather than take responsibility
> for their sick program of isolating these kids
> from their support networks and families and force
> them into an unhealthy lifestyle where they are
> blamed when they can't sell the church's crappy
> product. They don't get any alone time or time to
> just be normal...always about the mission.
>
> This is a recipe for exacerbating existing
> depression and causing new cases of depression
> where there weren't before.
>
> Did I mention this makes me furious?!?!
>
> SG

Makes me furious too!

One mother was notified of her son's choice:

"Wednesday morning, we got up early to interview and Elder who has told us that he wants to go home. He is from near {redacted}, Oregon and he had a girlfriend for three years. She has all kinds of emotional or mental problems and he pretty much kept her from killing herself and it was because of her that he came on a mission. Well he recently found out that she is getting married to someone else and he is so angry and bitter and stubborn and he just wanted to go home. We talked with him for an hour and 15 minutes and tried to reason with him but he is so stubborn, he would not commit to anything. It was so frustrating and the things he was saying were so stupid. I wondered if he was even listening to himself because he sounded like a spoiled child. Very prideful. We urged him to humble himself but he just told us that he likes being angry and bitter. It was pretty crazy. He did call yesterday and say that he is going to stay at least one more transfer. His Mom says that he will only do things if it is his idea and that he hates it when someone tries to talk him into anything. I hope he chooses not to ruin his life."

poor kid was conned. He's on to it, and has had enough. Hope we see him here on RFM soon.

It sounds like no family members are ever brought
> in on the situation.

Naturally, because they order the poor kids not to talk to their parents on the phone! A letter would not get to the parents in time to be helpful, plus letters are often monitored by the mission president, so the kids don't try to get help that way. They are left with no choice but to run away.
The problem is made even worse by now having 18 and 19 year olds on missions, instead of 19 and 21 year olds. They're essentially teenagers running around with no parental supervision and no ability to ask their parents or other trusted adults for advice over the phone in a timely manner.

>I do not understand why there is so much mental illness.

Because you are a Cult, forcing teens fresh out of high school to go on a "mission" they do not want to go on, but feel the pressure of their family and "church" to do so. Living apart from your family for the first time when you attend college is hard enough (it was for me). I can't even imagine how hard it would be that the first time away from your family you are not allowed to call them, have your contact with them limited, and have to deal with all the other Cult rules attached to a "mission" that goes along with this first time away from home.

Most of these teens probably do NOT have mental illness. They have not yet learned to stand up for themselves, how to live alone (well actually they AREN'T alone on their mission, which is also part of the problem), or had to face the "real world." Eighteen year olds have no business in being forced to recruit members for a Cult, that many of them probably see through, but go along with because they fear losing all contact with their family.

Lowering the age to 18 to try to get the members to stay before they have a chance to live on their own for a year and stand up for themselves is going to backfire. There will be more of these young people that will be disillusioned and will quit early and leave the Cult.

+1
This is so abusive to young people for all the reasons you outlined.

That was unbelievably sickening to read. I feel so sad and angry for these poor missionaries.

Putting missionaries on antidepressants while in the field seems borderline criminal. If missionaries are at that point they need to be sent home where they can REST, receive the proper support of family and close friends, get counseling by professionals, and be under close supervision of doctors. Not to mention get away from the root of the cause of the anxiety and depression.

While I tend to get annoyed with and even mock missionaries, this reminds me that most are just young, well-intentioned cult victims.

I am really upset after reading this.

She actually said that mission pressures exacerbate mental illness. Why are missions that stressful?

Maybe it's because these young people are being hazed and church broken. Maybe it's the stress of guilt over sexual feelings. It could be that the Mormon missionary program, a bad idea in the first place, is corrupt and amoral.

You hit the nail on the head!

These kids shouldn't have been there in the first place. They should have a policy of sending these kids home asap. Nooo, they are going to hold them hostage and MAKE them do this mission thing come hell or high water. This sounds like a slew of law suits should be going on. Apparently the parents are in the dark, and KEPT there no matter how bad it gets.

If you're a mishey and don't want to be, your only option seems to be one of running away. These kids desperately need some place to run to. Leaving all of your belongings in a park and running to a church that's open (obviously not a mo church) to pray is a desperate move. At the very least, these kids should have someone they can call and talk to that will help them get home.

This blog makes me feel sick. It's so sad. I'm surprised that more mishey's don't commit suicide.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/07/2014 01:45AM by madalice.

In the many years I have been on this list (10+)?? this has to be the most disturbing thing I have ever read.

Maybe because I can picture myself (nevermo) if I had been forced to to on a mission. Being an introvert, even at age 19 (much less the age of now 18) I would have been one of those she writes about that took their luggage and took off, without transportation or money.

The Cult solution: give em some drugs because they must be mentally ill to be depressed while on a mission, of what should be the happiest time of their life!

THIS CULT IS PURE EVIL!!!!

OMG! I know you said you edited these comments but several things stand out glaringly.

1st Missions are toxic. This is just TOO obvious.

2nd Missionaries are too young to take on the work and responsibility they are given with zero training. "Just follow the spirit" as advice is basically hanging the poor kids out to dry while working with possible psychotics. What IS this woman thinking???? She should have told the missionary to leave this guy alone rather than try and convert him.

3rd This woman is lying, lying, lying. She keeps saying she loves the missionaries yet practically guilts them to death to stay on their mission. If she loved them she would set them free instead of worrying about how she and her husband will look bad with so many missionaries depressed and leaving. Hasn't it occurred to her and her husband that so many otherwise young, happy, and healthy people becoming instantly depressed on their missions is a sign that something is seriously wrong with missions and NOT those on the mission????? This mission president and his wife are just about as clueless as the missionaries themselves. Blind leading the blind in my estimation.

One large question I have is why do the missionaries have to run away to get out of their mission? If she is really so worried about them running away why doesn't she tell all the missionaries that if they want to leave at any time they will be helped to go home. All the pressure to stay is leaving the mishies with no alternative BUT to run away! She is actually causing the the problem of runaway missionaries that she says she is so worried about. Gee. Get a clue woman. These young people have absolutely no love or trust in you. You are their enemy and your first thought is of the mission and not the person. They know and see this. You are a fraud.

"I do not understand why there is so much mental illness. It just plagues too many of our missionaries..."

So why hasn't she or the church asked a clinical psychologist or psychiatrist why this is happening? DUH! It it would be the rational, caring, and logical thing to do. Oh, that's right. IT'S A CULT!!!!

"I do not understand why there is so much mental illness. It just plagues too many of our missionaries and then it affects all of their companions too. Every time my phone rings, I almost dread answering for fear that it is another missionary with stress, anxiety, or depression and so many times it manifests itself in physical illnesses. I know that we are not the only mission that is seeing this and way too many kids are having to go home. I would have never guessed that we would be dealing with this to this extent"

she doesn't understand 'why' and yet the answer is staring her right in the face - often literally staring at her and her husband and begging to go home: being a missionary sucks balls lady - that's why!

yes, for a very small minority of Mormons it might just be 'the best 2 years' of their lives but for most missionaries the experience is soul crushing

The fact that she even voices this "I do not understand" comment is impressive, actually... She punishes herself for voicing any doubts by affirming over and over we love the missionaries, we love the mission blah blah blah...but still, the doubts she talks about proves that the real person underneath the cult personality is still there. She's still capable of some kind of rationale thought. Sadly, even being this honest, to voice ANY doubts, is all too rare for Mormons and other people trapped in cults.

"By their fruits ye shall know them."

Wait, whaaaaat? They are doing missions the Lord sould have them being shiney, happy people.

why they have to run away.

Running away and being tracked down is what happens in a cult

Ah, the trifecta... mental illness, porn, and social media/electronic device addiction. Surely these are the culprits of missionary problems!

Bro. Stan is a busy and crafty guy.

This thread brought back all the terrible memories from my mission. I remember every night at bedtime being so excited to go to bed and get 8 hours of respite from my daily hell. When my alarm clock would ring and it was time to begin a new day it was a horrible feeling. There was nowhere to turn. Going home and facing the shame of a dishonorable release sounded way too terrible to face, but sticking the damn thing out for the whole two years didn't seem any better. I don't know how I got through it. I guess I eventually just became numb and found a happy medium between doing "the Lard's work" and slacking off. I was put on Lexapro while out on the mission, but weaned myself off because I realized it wasn't doing a damn bit of good. An environmental problem was causing my misery, not a chemical imbalance in my brain. The drugs they are stuffing down these poor mishies gullets are all for naught.

I decided to do a quick search to see what missionaries from other churches blogged about, and the difference is pretty stark. Missionaries -- Real missionaries -- actually seem like a pretty excited group who love helping people and are very involved in their faith.

I find it interesting that the mission president's wife never once referred to Jesus. When you read the blogs of real missionaries, it seems that that's pretty much all they want to talk about at times. Agree or disagree with what they're doing, but it sure seems like they are actually doing what missionaries should likely be doing.

http://blogs.ntm.org

"One of the biggest problems that we have in the mission is the mental health of our missionaries."
Actually it's the mission that's probably causing most of their mental health problems!
From reading this letter, it's obvious it's not just the missionaries whose mental health is suffering. This lady is clearly very stressed out and not enjoying life. She's coping by letting out her feelings in this letter, but it's a situation she shouldn't be in in the first place. She should be having a normal life with a normal husband with a normal job instead, and then she wouldn't sound so damned frantic and frazzled in this letter. Mormonism is a weird system, and it gets worse the more you are involved with it.

The Mp's wife is nothing more than a prison guard of 18 yo's that don't want to be there. She tracks them down when they escape. Not because they want to help them, but because they want to rope them back in, even if they have to drug them to keep them there.

Most likely, none of these kids need drugs. They just need to be reset to "normal". There's nothing about their situation that's 'normal".

To me, it looks like the idea of sending out 18 year olds is one of the worst ideas the church has had since polygamy and roping teenagers into marriage. How dumb and blind can they be? Teenagers shouldn't be doing the things that the church is forcing them into. Shame on the parents for letting the church call the shots with their children. This just proves that the church is one lousy excuse for a parent.

I don't know which group or organization could do this, but there NEEDS to be a toll free number that missionaries can call for information and assistance in getting out--or to talk to someone who can help them figure out what is best for them at the moment they call. Exactly like the Suicide Hotline.

There also needs to be a number (or web contact) that missionaries serving outside of North America can call for information and help when they want to get out, too.

Those numbers/website addresses should be disseminated as widely as is possible (in the places missionaries, or those who will in the near future become missionaries, would be likely to be aware of).

I have NO idea of the practicalities of how this would/should be done, but it NEEDS to be done...and ASAP. It seems to me that the numbers of missionaries desperate to get out is increasing.

These are 18-year-old kids who are adults by legal classification only. They need the same help as a 16- or 17-year-old would need in the same position.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/07/2014 02:05AM by tevai.

Most of these kids are teenagers! Their brains aren't even fully developed yet -- still, they are being pressured to do the impossible.

On one side you have the Mormon world with its idealized and totally unrealistic claims and demands.

On the other side you have the real world that is now highly informed through the Internet.

The missionaries are being squeezed between these two. They have the impossible chore of trying to reconcile the church's fantasies with the world's realities...and they are taking body blows from BOTH SIDES.

If the General Authorities themselves can't reconcile fantasy with reality ... how are a bunch of under-informed teenagers supposed to do it?

Nothing can cause more stress than being required to do the impossible.

this kids have so much pressure and stress on them. If they come home early they know they will be gossiped about. It has gotta to suck being them. Yes they are very socially unaware of themselves and others. But it's their damn parents and the churches fault. Hopefully they will find themselves out of this cult. The resources are there if they would only google. I've been googling for years. It's not hard. Does it really take a high IQ to google?

Link to blog?

Blake Murdoch is the MP...

Isn't this the famous Hermana Brooke Stoeltzing's mission?

Just scanning through MP profiles.

Check out the name on this 35 year old MP. Good ol' family name setting him up for a lifetime of unlimited tithing dollars.

The TSSC makes me SICK.



https://www.lds.org/church/news/first-presidency-calls-new-mission-presidents-gallery?lang=eng#benson

Get it whilst it's still up....

http://coloradodenversouthmission.blogspot.co.uk

this is why some relative needs to make sure the kids have a credit card and contact number when they leave on their mission, so they won't have to walk around in a park with no where to go.

And wow Blake is giving a lot of blessings, isn't he.