eg. My husband and I were converts to the church. We went inactive then returned to activity (retrospective facepalm) and got married on a Saturday. We were not going on a honeymoon because I was in the middle of my honours thesis but we had booked a lovely hotel room for the night. The branch president insisted we attend sacrament meeting the next morning at 9am. What an a-hole. I still can't believe we did. He later became a bishop. And he and his family would have regular weekend "breaks" away from all their responsibilities. Again, what an a-hole.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 04/23/2014 05:20AM by poem.

That's really weird that he would insist on you coming to church the night after you got married.

I would really appreciate hearing other people's stories because I am still so mad about things like this. I know it pales in comparison to polygamy and paedophilia and tithings, but each little indignity when added together really really really bites

This was actually from the Stake President when I had a Temple Recommend Interview right before my wedding.

He counseled my fiance and I to do all we can to be chaste before our wedding night and then when we were legal to "turn eachother upside down and see what you got." Like we indentify the sex of pupplies!!???

I may had been virginal, I was not niave to human anatomy or how it worked!

The SP also recommended a few books to read.

I wanted to tell him I aleady did a LOT of research with Non Mo resources.

The best part was how he went on and on how the Lord was so PLEASED we had remained absolutley chaste for this time.

That is when I knew he did not have the Priesthood (at that time I had not grasped that the church was a lie yet) because the fiancee and I had done almost everything BUT the final "deed" of deflowering me.

Funny thing, the ex tells me I tempted him to do these things. I admit..I WANTED TO, but he was the one that told me he wanted to prepare me for my wedding night so I would not be scared.

Funny Mormon Rabbits.
Tricks are for kids.

RMM

What is with the SPs and their creepy sexy talks. See my comment below about what our SP said???

When my wife and I were first married we moved into a new apartment and started attending the new ward. After a couple of weeks we were asked to meet with the bishop and his counselors. After sitting down, they each introduced themselves. Then the bishop, without taking any time to get to know us and learn that we had only been married a few weeks, "called" us to serve in the NURSERY! My wife, in her shock and horror blurted out "oh, my! NO!!!" The look on their faces was priceless. I don't think anyone had every said no to a calling, much less a woman. I agreed with my wife that the nursery wouldn't work for us and they sent us on our way. Who the hell tries to assign newlyweds to serve in the nursery???

A few weeks later we were called to be Stake Missionaries. We accepted that calling because it meant we wouldn't have to spend Sundays in that stupid ward.

Kudos to you both. I got called as primary president and my husband as a counsellor to the BP. We accepted. As a young woman with no experience of children and as a convert, it was a very steep learning curve

Nursery is the church's natural birth control for newlyweds, they just wanted you and your new hubby to have some time as a couple before having kids.

I probably would have accepted the nursery and said "Hell no!" to the stake missionary calling. Nursery is probably the best calling you could get...no stupid SS and EQ/RS lessons, you get to play with toys, etc...

They called my husband and I to the nursery as well when we decided to attend a family ward a few months after marriage. We were attending a married student ward before, which was a mind trip for me. By the time we went to this new ward, I was pregnant, and pregnancy doesn't suit me well at all. It was plain torture to get up and down (I'm short and my mid-section grew really big), to not be grouchy with my raging hormones, and to fight the exhaustion. The bishopric of that ward thought it would be good idea for pregnant couples to be in the nursery to prepare them for parenthood. They were always released a couple weeks before the babies were due. When my due date came up, another pregnant couple moved into the ward. The bishop called them in with the intent of replacing my husband and I with the new couple. To his surprise, the new couple's due date was even closer than ours by a week or two! They got out of a nursery calling, and we had to wait even longer before our release.

I've had the nursery as my calling many times. The first was just out of high school. I wasn't even 18 yet. There were a ton of kids and my nursery partner almost never showed up. That was a tough calling. I released myself from it when I started working graveyard and couldn't stay awake through nursery. I started going to the local singles ward instead.

Part of my "repentance process" included praying for 1 hour each day. Seriously. And, I actually did it once without falling asleep first.

That is a long time!?!

Before we got married, the SP counselled us not to have oral sex or do anything sexual that we would be embarrassed for Heavenly Father to see!?! That our sexual relations should be in harmony with the spirit. That was over 13 year sago and I'm still not sure what that means

poem Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Before we got married, the SP counselled us not to
> have oral sex or do anything sexual that we would
> be embarrassed for Heavenly Father to see!?! That
> our sexual relations should be in harmony with the
> spirit. That was over 13 year sago and I'm still
> not sure what that means

After the church courts were over, I told my Bishop that my ex-girlfriend (who was excommunicated for having sex with several different guys, not just me) was pregnant and had married someone else. He then laughed and said "well, it looks like you're off the hook then. What's the problem?". I guess that in the church's eyes the man is only good for his sperm donation and for his financial support. Any man will do. After a real judge got involved, it became clear that the kid never will know his real dad since no one knows who that is. Thanks Bishop for your support. These courts of love are just so precious (not).

Church discipline is really, really scary. Close minded, untrained, zero-nil legal knowledge making life changing rulings.

Something my daughter told me yesterday: If you eat 10 bananas how can you know which one made you fat?

You couldn't take a DNA test?

I had a boyfriend that I broke up with because he went on vacation and spent it sleeping around with other women.

After he came home he felt bad and went to his bishop. His bishop told him the only way I would ever forgive him is if he married me, and instructed him to propose.

He did! I was disgusted when he did that. I didn't feel too sincere, and I later found out it wasn't.

So glad I didn't fall for that stupid scheme. He married someone else, had two kids, and then died. Left her destitute. Yeah, that could of been me.

Told us to pay tithes on unemployment because HE "needed" my husband. I see it now for what it is. Please pay now so you can hold a high ass calling and we can soak up your time and treat your wife like sh!t. Because it wasn't like he needed to be fully concentrating on a job search. (Dh got a job shortly after this incident). Then the sp called us in to "meet" us and asked if we had our priorities straight and if we had balance. Lol.

Tithings is bad enough, but the unquantifiable vast amounts of time and energy TSCC demands of people is lunacy. I'm sure they viewed the job success as evidence of the blessings of tithes

Oh I am sure. We knew the job was going to happen before we were just waiting for final offers and such. But yes, there was much rejoicing among the land for our tithing paying miracle. :). Funny though-since we left church we have seen many "blessings/miracles" and no tithes involved. Hmm.

When my bishop was interviewing me for my mission, I came right out and told him that I was "struggling" with atheism. He said that he saw that as a red flag but didn't see any reason why that would keep me from serving a mission.

My bishop in our small town in Idaho, Invited me not to return to church. I had just beat his son so bad he went to the hospital for a few days. Don't think I ever went back again.

When I was encouraged to admit that I liked what my rapist did to me. I must have liked it since I was a whore who enjoyed tank tops and short shorts.

Eeewwww, just gross. Vile. I don't have enough words to describe.

I've told this story so many times on here--but I will again.

When I found out my boyfriend was gay--the bishop asked if we'd participate in a 3-month experiment. He assigned my boyfriend to French kiss me, but not tell me, to see if he could get turned on. I had never French kissed because I was afraid I'd have to repent to a bishop. My boyfriend told me beforehand, but considering my first French kissing was with someone gay at age 25 on assignment from a bishop is rather mind blowing. He then told us we could do anything up to, but not including intercourse and he'd still give us temple recommends if we decided to get married. Then I was counseled by many leaders to marry him, that he'd never leave me, etc.

My dad always saw me as extremely intelligent, as does my now (and past) boyfriend. My dad was SHOCKED that I would marry my husband knowing he was gay. When I told him the leaders told me it was my job to save him, my dad was FURIOUS. I even got input from Packer on the subject.

So--I pretty much fucked up my life because of leaders.

Somehow I've come full circle and my life is in a good place now--but it sure was a hell of a ride.

He wanted to release me from a calling because he didn't like me (his words) and then told me to go home and pray about it.

The bishop and YW leaders encouraged me to not obey my parents as a teenager. Both my parents were inactive (partly because to put food on the table they had to work every weekend, and because they had seen what the church was really about) so I would come on my own. Then, my parents began discouraging things like girl's camp and mutual on Wednesday nights because I needed to be focusing on school, work, and preparing for college. The bishop/leaders/every busy body started recommending I move out of my parents home and in with a "good member" and stop working so I could focus on church which "would bring me more blessings than working and saving for college ever would" They told me to stop seeing my siblings (I was the only one still in at this point, because no one in my family wanted to be the one to tell me to leave, they wanted me to find out for myself) They also told me not to date the boys from church because I should "leave the good mormon boys for the girls who had good mormon families" which just made the boys chase me more since I was "off limits" Luckily, I realized what a cult I was in and left shortly after my 18th birthday, to my parents delight!

My DH became engaged to a girl right off of his mission and followed her up to Ricks College. Turns out she was bipolar and gave him quite the emotional roller coaster. He ended up breaking off the engagement. His bishop at the time told dh to go on a date with 50 different girls to help him move on. I believe I was number 7 so he didn't make it to 50. Crazy advice that actually worked out for us :)

Admit you liked what your rapist did to you because you must have, look how slutty you dress? Abandon your family, live with the neighbors, but don't date our precious boys, instead, save them for the girls from good families. Save your gay boyfriend by French kissing? Okay. This is a cult.