One of the things that used to bug me about TSCC was in the stalls of the toilets, they had little single sheets of toilet paper that looked and felt like wax paper. There is no way anything could have been cheaper to wipe yourself with than these things.

The bishop that had these things installed lived next door so he did not have to use them.

The Stake President had his own toilet in his office that no one was suppose to know about. He was to good to crap with us lowly tithe payers.

Did anyone have a church leader that was cheaper than these two?

Maybe I did - Bishop Pistol the FBI agent had the boy scout house torn down to save the cost of electricity to light it.

when I do, I'm overwhelmed by the bad smell of the men's room. And I LOATHE and openly mock the single-sheet-single-ply dispenser in the stall. That may be the most ridiculous and obnoxious thing in the building. I wonder if that's a point of interest during open houses.

My parents instructed us on the number of squares of TP we should use, how's that for cheap?
4 sheets max. So rebellious little me used 5, just because.

They were too cheap to get the septic system pumped and figured it would last longer that way with paper rationing. Nowadays it's required by my county, and fines are issued for every month it is past due after three years.
Who knew??? Certainly not my parents. That thing was supposed to last forever as far as they were concerned, so it was definitely our fault that it needed pumping that one time after we had lived there ten years.

Just another excuse to shame and scold. I never did use excessive amounts before that either. Punitive focused parents don't teach how to live in the world, just how to work around increasingly idiotic regulations for every damn thing.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/22/2014 11:39AM by WinksWinks.

You from California, WinksWinks?

Nope, sorry.

"Punitive focused parents don't teach how to live in the world, just how to work around increasingly idiotic regulations for every damn thing."

Which, you have to admit, is a fairly useful skill...

The women's bathrooms in churches always smell like dirty diapers!

I forgot that we were taught how to limit the number of sheets used by folding them in half and half and half and half to get the maximum number of wipes per sheet.

TSCC bathrooms have the most unique smell to them all over the US. They all smell horrible. It is the same smell no matter where you go.

And all it would take are a few minutes after everyone leaves and again early Sunday morning and the same on other times the building is used. Especially true about the diapers.

this is true, its a certain fetid/stale fecal quality all of its own.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/21/2014 09:19PM by footdoc.

themaster Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I forgot that we were taught how to limit the
> number of sheets used by folding them in half and
> half and half and half to get the maximum number
> of wipes per sheet.
>
> TSCC bathrooms have the most unique smell to them
> all over the US. They all smell horrible. It is
> the same smell no matter where you go.


My husband was taught the fold-over method.

Is it taught in some Provident Living class? I thought surely his family was the only one that folded the TP!

Oh no, that was part of the instructions given about the rationing; folded, not scrunched, was supposed to result in the most efficient use out of the least TP.
Mormon standard cheapskating, lol!

Actually the disgusting smell is the same not only across the states but in every other country too. I really wonder why and how that works but it does. And the TP is always the cheapest to get. In Germany they often used kind of I'd say sandpaper.

I lived in Germany for three years, and I can affirm that the toilet paper was kind of rough. Our yankee butts are pampered with Charmin and Angel Soft. Quilted, baby!

Warning: TMI

But I'ma just say it.

Cheap toilet paper rolls into little balls when you use it. This causes "dingleberries." So you need more toilet paper to handle that problem. Which, literally, snowballs. ;>) So it turns out that cheap toilet paper really isn't cheap at all, when you have to use three times as much to accomplish the same task ( a dingleberry-free butt).

I am pretty sure there were PH lessons for the fathers to teach us how to save on TP. One Sunday we were taught how to only use one sheet of TP to clean ourselves.

You fold it in half, tear a half moon in the half sheet of tp creating a circle in the 1 sheet of tp. Be sure and keep the small piece of tp. Stick your finger in the hole, clean yourself and use the 1 sheet of tp to wipe your finger clean. You then use the small piece of tp to clean your finger nail.

I most likely have saved $1.47 in tp cost over my lifetime using these inspired instructions. 17 cents at church alone.

We must all be diligent and preserve the lord's money so his beloved leaders can buy mansions and expensive vacations for their families.

I say this in the name of him who lives on high and eats hot jelly filled donuts filled to the brim with the rich taste of non caffeine coffee in their cups of urine. Amen

No, you then use SOAP and water and preferably BLEACH to clean your fingernail... lest you be fingering your wife later, spreading e coli and fecal coliform bacteria up in her nether regions.

That was disgusting. I hope you were joking.

If they really wanted to keep the septic system going for a long time, they should have installed bidets and took toilet paper away altogether.

I thought those single sheet dispensers went out in the 50s.

Well, speaking of too much information.....this thread reminded me of another cult whose leader clearly proscribed proper potty practices.

None other than the late Ayatollah Khomeini,


>>>"It is required that everyone, when urinating or defecating, hide his sexual parts from all pubescent persons, even his sister or his mother, as well as from any feebleminded person or children too young to understand. But husband and wife are not required to hide them from each other.

It is not indispensable to hide one's genitals with anything in particular; one's hand is enough.

When defecating or urinating, one must squat in such a way as neither to face Mecca nor to turn one's back upon it.

It is not sufficient to turn one's sex organ away, while oneself facing or turning one's back on Mecca; one's privates must never be exposed either facing Mecca or facing directly away from Mecca.

Urinating and defecating are forbidden in four places: blind alleys, except with the permission of those living along them; the property of a person who has not given permission to do so; places of worship, such as medersas; graves of believers, unless one does so as an insult to them.

In three cases, it is absolutely necessary to purify one's anus with water: when the excrement has been expelled with other impurities, such as blood, for example; when some impure thing has grazed the anus; when the anal opening has been soiled more than usual. Apart from these three cases, one may either wash one's anus with water or wipe it with some fabric or a stone.

The urinary orifice can be cleaned off with water, and it is enough to wash it just one time after urinating. But those in whom the urine comes out through some other orifice would do better to wash that orifice at least twice. This must be observed by women as well.

It is not necessary to wipe one's anus with three stones or three pieces of fabric: a single stone or single piece of fabric is enough. But if one wipes it with a bone, or any sacred object, such as, for example, a paper having the name of God on it, one may not say his prayers while in this state.
- See more at: http://www.poopreport.com/Techniques/Content/Ayatollah/ayatollah.html#sthash.1WfEsFTj.dpuf