I would like to know, because my GF--who I love--is TBM and I'm a never-mo atheist. Thus, I've been dragged into the world of Mormonism. I believe it would be very informative for me and that ex-mo folks could offer some sound advice.

Thanks.

Yes, you are welcome.

I think it's fine if you have a close tie to it and legitimate concerns, but if a nevermo's came along just to learn about the downside or just because they found it interesting, I would feel like all our pain is being exploited. We come here to find people who understand and don't judge, and half of us are scared to meet up anyway. Just meeting with each other is a big step! Even if someone like you came along but they brought a friend or brother, I would feel uncomfortable and angry.

Mormonism damaged me. I find great comfort in the camaraderie of our group. My perspective is a little different but so is everyone's. In some ways I have a more typical 6 generation Mormon history than would, say, a convert who left after a few years. But our group welcomes everyone and values their unique circumstances.

We welcome everyone.

Our nevermos have family ties to tscc or investigated it.

IF you're there to understand and participate I say feel free to join the exmo meetups..

Just my opinion
KJ/AnonyMs

We meet today......see previous post.

I've gone to a couple. They don't have horns. ;)

You're fully welcome. There's always strength in diversity. I am really a bit of an outsider myself, having come from jack-mo's and having only gone through the motions all my life without ever really believing. BTW, it can get very complicated when a non-believer has a relationship with a true believer.. I guess you may have already considered that.

The Seattle group is quite big.

We had one never mo, former preacher now atheist come a couple of times, I think somebody had to ask him to not come again.

It turned into a theological discussion about what we USED to believe in, and believe it or not, we started arguing.

Moronic. A total waste of time.

I go to the groups to laugh about our "mormonism" and heal, not to discuss the finer points of what we USED to believe in with some dickwad pastor.

How lame!

There are a few ground rules...

1.) Don't be a dick.
2.) They aren't a place for evangelizing for another religion.
3.) Don't be a dick.

That is all.

We do three a year and another exmo has a coffee meetup once a month in our area.

Never Mormons need to recover if they've been harassed or mistreated by Mormons or they need to hear the exmo side of the story if they're interested.

I'm totally with you on the first part, not the second. I think plenty of research can be done online by those just curious about the downside and they don't need to come to our healing support groups to get off on the stories.

That's a little unfair. I doubt most nevermo's want to meet up to "get off on the stories." Most non's have no clue the depth of screwy the Mormon church cultivates and just like Exmo's, nevermo's who have been affected by Mormonism have no one to talk to who really get it. The exmo's get it and can be an excellent source of support. They wouldn't even be here or want to meet the exmo's except for the fact they have been impacted by Mormonism.

I agree with you. I think you misunderstood me. I absolutely agree that a Nevermo who has been personally affected by the church and needs to understand it better to heal him or herself is welcome!

I'm talking about Nevermos that just find it all interesting and want to see the downside of the church. Say, they or a family member are thinking of joining but they've heard it can mess a person up, so they want to hear our stories. Then I think they can just do their research without sitting in on our sessions in which we bear, or at least bring with us internally, so much pain.

Agreed.

What some ex-Mormons have been through is also quite similar to what members and former members of certain other faiths have been through as well. While my encounter with Mormons/Mormonism was not particularly negative, and I did not continue with the faith due to belies and history rather than bad experiences, the experiences I've had as a former member of a lesser-known faith group to which I have very strong family ties (which I was born and raised into, pre-Mormonism, pre-Hare Krishna for me) are strikingly similar to some of the experiences that have been described by certain ex-Mormons.

Associating with people with similar experiences, learning from them, and - very importantly - knowing that you are NOT alone can help substantially in the healing process.

Yep. That's my point. As long as everyone is there for healing and sharing in some way. But not if it's just, 'oh I just think Mormonism sounds like it WOULD be hurtful, let's see if I'm right' or even a well-intentioned 'I know nothing about this but think religion in general sucks and want to support you guys,' even if they saw some of it as a kid or something but aren't really personally affected by it. It's the personal part that is important to me. Researchers and those who just find it interesting can go elsewhere.

Definitely welcome at our Vegas meetups!

For a few years, I had an ex-JW for a girlfriend. I took her to the get-togethers. The result was people wanted to talk to her more than me. Oh, well.

So, sure, it's not unusual for exmos to bring their partner.

Well, here's the thing. The stuff we talk about there isn't so much secret, as it is sacred. Surely you understand.