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Posted by: tomie ( )
Date: April 11, 2014 10:35PM

What are the benefits of resigning over going inactive?

If you resign is it a guarantee you will never have missionaries at your door or other church members?

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Posted by: stillburned ( )
Date: April 11, 2014 10:43PM

As I understand it, no, it is not a guarantee. You will be just like the rest of us Gentiles who occasionally get the knock on the door. I would bet, however, that it will drastically reduce that sort of stuff, as you will no longer be the target of reactivation efforts. What I read here on RfM makes me think this is what most resignees experience.

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Posted by: boydslittlefactory ( )
Date: April 11, 2014 11:45PM

It wasn't such a big deal to me or another son.

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Posted by: finallygetsit ( )
Date: April 12, 2014 12:08AM

That... and you are no longer counted in their official numbers.

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Posted by: Devoted Exmo ( )
Date: April 13, 2014 08:00PM

Unfortunately there's no evidence that you are no longer counted. Evidence suggests that they continue to be counting the resigned members.

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Posted by: Someone registered my name ( )
Date: April 12, 2014 12:45AM

I liked bending the church to MY will after a lifetime of bending to theirs. It was important for me to hear them say - You are NOT one of us. Now when someone asks if I'm a Mormon I can honestly reply No. Before the answer was kind of ethically muddy. My "freedom letter" is framed and hanging on my bedroom wall. I've never hung my college diplomas. Yeah, It was important to me.

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Posted by: Pooped ( )
Date: April 12, 2014 01:05PM

Same feeling for me as above. I don't have my letter framed and on the wall but I feel totally free now. I never had a problem with Mormons at the door. The problem was in my head. I didn't feel "clean" from the taint of it all. Today I feel like my old self before I converted. Also, my never Mormon friends know I've found my true north.

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Posted by: mayerbabe ( )
Date: April 13, 2014 04:43PM

Our freedom letters, which we received on February 26, 2014, was an extremely important milestone for me too.

I had spent 6-7 years in the church struggling along. Strong doubts, extreme guilt, severe depression and anxiety. During those years, when I was asked if I was a Mormon, I never knew how to respond.

Once I had finally concluded it was all a fraud, I did not want to be associated with the organization in any way, shape, or form, and my husband had come to the same conclusions as well, so we wanted to take a stand against the organization and formally resign. I understand everyone has their own journey and own way of doing things in this regard, however. For us, resigning was our only option, and we didn't want our children considered "Mormon" any longer either.

I haven't gone to the point of framing my letter, but that's a great idea! The day I received it is my Independence Day!

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Posted by: HangarXVIII ( )
Date: April 12, 2014 01:02AM

I recommend reading the section on Richard Packham's website that outlines the advantages and disadvantages of resigning vs. going inactive:
http://packham.n4m.org/leaving.htm

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Posted by: presleynfactsrock ( )
Date: April 12, 2014 01:06AM

Resigning was something that was important for me to do. I needed and wanted to take the step for myself and for my family and friends. In my mind it was something I could do to stand up for myself and to stand up to the church.

The reaction of some to my resignation has been swift, calculating, and judgmental. Their alligence is to the church and they do see me as a evil apostate. Others have not seemed to care and our friendship is still strong, and some just do not understand why I would give the church the time of day by taking this action.

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Posted by: HangarXVIII ( )
Date: April 12, 2014 12:48PM

Yep, you can always tell who your true friends are once you leave the church.

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Posted by: Cheryl ( )
Date: April 12, 2014 12:52PM

Also, they can't ex you after that and you might have a sense of freedom or closure after resigning.

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Posted by: finex ( )
Date: April 12, 2014 02:30PM

I solemnly testify that resigning grants you with emotional relief over being inactive. The psychological impact of getting the paperwork done gives you personal closure to the issue and that is an extremely relieving feeling. It makes it final and enables you to push it out of your mind for good.

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Posted by: TheOtherHeber ( )
Date: April 12, 2014 04:15PM

Resigning is like excomunicating the Church!

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Posted by: Devoted Exmo ( )
Date: April 13, 2014 08:01PM

Love that!

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Posted by: AnonNow ( )
Date: April 12, 2014 07:42PM

Richard Packham's site suggests four possible courses of action. Might I suggest a fifth?

5. Appear to be a rabid TBM in all your interactions with the church or it's members- but do it in the style of President Padernoster or Elder Delaney (Google them if you don't know about those two).

Nevin

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Posted by: emanon ( )
Date: April 12, 2014 08:34PM

Resignation gets you off the local Church books.
If you don't resign, you could become a project by members, subjected to their ideas of reactivation. Even after 20 years of no contact by members of the Church you could suddenly be bombarded with visits and/contact, if you don't resign.


While you are still on local Church books you will be discussed by members of the Church. It happens more than people know.

While you are on local Church books every believing member KNOWS you believe the Church is true, you are just being tempted by Satan and/or you are spiritually weak for not attending weekly 3 hour services and for not contributing to the "building up of the Kingdom of God on Earth".

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Posted by: azsteve ( )
Date: April 13, 2014 12:56AM

I don't think a person can fully recover until they resign and tell those who care about you that you're officially out. Then you've done your part of unraveling the lie. Others will follow you. But most importantly, you've been true to yourself and to those who are a part of who you are in this world. Those who no longer believe and who yet hedge their bets and stay in for whatever reasons, are false people to themselves and to the world. I respect TBMS more.

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Posted by: jpt ( )
Date: April 13, 2014 01:02AM

They've take too much from me. Resigning would mean I'd just disappear from them... so they can continue thinking their cultish fishbowl is 15 million strong. I'm going to continue to be an inactive pain in the ass to them, and a constant reminder of someone who doesn't agree with them.

I've had local members and family members suggest I resign. I figure it's their job to not be dumb enough to visit me, and not for me to sign a paper giving them permission to stop.

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Posted by: moremany ( )
Date: April 13, 2014 09:38AM

Some people need to come up out of the water somehow.
Choose your method.

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Posted by: Lori at 51 ( )
Date: April 13, 2014 02:23PM

I spent over 20 years as an inactive non-believer before I resigned and believe me, resigned is better.

Lori

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Posted by: thedesertrat1 ( )
Date: April 13, 2014 04:29PM

An interesting thing. We have not had a home teacher darken our door since Aug 2011. That is OK with me. Maybe we dropped through the cracks.

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Posted by: jbstyle ( )
Date: April 13, 2014 07:57PM

I feel like it makes it clear that it's not just a phase, or that you believe but just want to "sin" for a little while. A resignation makes it very clear that you. are. done.

I resigned in 2008. In 2011 I went to my 20 year high school reunion, and saw a few people, who I know had been Mormon while we were young, drinking wine, etc. A year ago, I saw one of them put a status update on Facebook about going to the temple. I was shocked; I think that I must have assumed that she had experienced an epiphany similar to mine and left the church permanently whereas, apparently, she was just "inactive" for a time.

No one can ever make that mistake with me, and a resignation also makes it clear that the church has no power or authority over me any longer.

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Posted by: rhgc ( )
Date: April 13, 2014 08:35PM

I had used up my chance to tell the high counsel what I thought and had shown my skill as a lawyer in winning an appeal to the FP. Finally, when they essentially tried to destroy my family, I resigned. They had reached the level of true evil, and can go to hell. What respect I had always had for the local leaders was replaced with distaste.

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