Posted by:
jiminycricket
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Date: October 05, 2013 06:24PM
Saturday October 5, 2013 (2:00 p.m. Mountain Daylight Time)
. . . And it Came To Pass . . . that the 183rd Semiannual General Convergence of the WorldWideWealthy Church of Jesus Christ of Led-astray Saints, the Morgbots was Broadcast from the Great and Spacious Building in the shadows of the everlasting House of Handshakes (Salt Lake City, Utah). Loyal cult followers from all over the world assembled to receive visionary directives and indoctrination. Cult speakers were selected from among the privileged leaders and General Authorities of the Church, the Greater Elite having been sealed and/or enjoined by secret combination to Godhood courtesy of clandestine temple rites known as the Second Anointing. © 2013 by Unintellectual Preserved, Last Rites Preferred
SPEAKERS:
. . . (1) Elder BOYD K. PACKER, President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles
. . . (2) Elder D. TODD CHRISTOFFERSON, Quorum of the Twelve Apostles
. . . (3) Elder S. GIFFORD NIELSEN, First Quorum of the Seventy
. . . (4) Elder ARNULIO VALENZUELA, First Quorum of the Seventy
. . . (5) Elder TIMOTHY J. DYCHES, Second Quorum of the Seventy
. . . (6) Elder JEFFREY R. HOLLAND, Quorum of the Twelve Apostles
. . . (7) Elder M. RUSSELL BALLARD, Quorum of the Twelve Apostles
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NOTES from SESSION no. 2
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CONDUCTING: President Dieter F. Uchtdorf
CHOIR: Family Choir (Stakes Roy, Cainsville, Hooper & West Haven Utah)
MUSIC DIRECTOR: Jane Fielstedt (sp)
ORGANIST: Linda Margetts
OPENING CHOIR NUMBER: “On This Day of Joy and Gladness”
OPENING PRAYER: Paul V. Johnson, First Quorum of the Seventy
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SUSTAINING of AUTHORITIES: President Henry B. Eyring
First Counselor in the First Presidency
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CHOIR MUSICAL NUMBER: “I Know That My Savior Loves Me”
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1st SPEAKER: Elder Boyd K. Packer
President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles
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(1) The safe place to raise children in righteousness is in a Gospel centered home.
(2) Quotes verses of warning. We live in perilous times. Among us are blasphemers and those with unnatural affections.
(3) Uses depictions of the ancient Paul and the BoM (fictional guy) Moroni.
(4) He thinks of the future of positive optimism. The scriptures hold the doctrines, laws and ordinances that each child needs.
(5) Over the years we’ve provided scriptures in many languages to teach all what we must do.
(6) Story from President Young. Start reading from the BoM, and inspiration will come. Make scripture reading regular. Keep reading. There is beauty and power therein. All scripture is given by inspiration of God.
(7) All scripture is given by inspiration of God.
(8) Righteousness is more powerful than wickedness.
(9) Quoting Sons of Mosiah from BoM, that they searched the scriptures diligently.
(10) Tells a story (who knows if it is true? Another Paul H. Dunn tale?).
(11) Each of us can be clean, stay on the course, keep your covenants until the Holy Ghost is revealed as a moving force in your life. Jesus has given us a direct course.
(12) We need forgiveness through personal prayer. Some sins must be confessed to a “qualified and spiritual physician.”
(13) He thinks that teaching stories from the BoM are wondrous in helping you in the repentance process. The Lord requires you to turn away from your sins.
(14) Your transgressions will be erased through the Atonement of Jesus Christ.
(15) The Gospel teaches us to be happy, to have faith not fear, have hope and overcome despair. Peace can be settled in the heart of those that turn to the scriptures. He names all the standard works as a spiritual protection.
(16) The Lord’s Church has been established. I am a witness.
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2nd SPEAKER: Elder D. Todd Christofferson
Quorum of the Twelve Apostles
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(1) The Moral Force of Women
(2) Their contribution is often not appreciated. They bring a certain virtue, a divine gift to be able to instill gifts in others: faith, courage, empathy, refinement in relationships and cultures.
(3) Story about a women in Mexico. She radiated a moral authority of goodness. She sacrificed pleasures for a higher need, her children. Yet she felt she a serenity being about God’s work. She was love personified.
(4) Another women, a pioneer in New Jersey (Henry and Anna Daines). She was a volunteer at the YMCA. She inspired others and has influenced her decendants.
(5) His grandmother taught him to be conscientious in Priesthood service. So he memorized the Sacramental Prayers. She instilled a reverence for sacred things. She knew how to make boys become Priesthood men.
(6) The traditional family is the best place to raise children. A mother can, by example, teach sons high moral standards. She teaches her children to act responsibly without excuses, and to make on-going contributions in society.
(7) Most sacred is the women’s ability in the creation of life. We must have a physical and spiritual re-birth in our journey back to God. They’re the guardians of the well spring of life. Teach sexual purity. They bring out the best in men and provide wholesome environments to raise secure and healthy children.
(8) We now have fatherless families. Promiscuity. It degrades all of society. Men are liberated and women are burdened with the children.
(9) Women are being pushed to be aggressive and tough (like in the movies).
(10) Today we are blurring the feminine and masculine differences. Women need to preserve their innate intuition. Dress needs to be modest and virtuous.
(11) It’s the relationship to God that you must put first. That is where you receive your moral power. Strive to be his disciple. Bring up children in light and truth and to pray.
(12) Brethren let us stand with women to help them cultivate their moral authority.
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3rd SPEAKER: Elder S. Gifford Nielsen
First Quorum of the Seventy
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(1) A story right out of the gate. (His ears and hair reminds me of the Mad guy).
He speaks like he wants to be “Mr. Uppity.” I can’t look.
(2) We are to hasten the Lord’s work – NOW!
(3) We are all on the Lord’s team. Don’t we want to share our testimony with everyone?
(4) He mentions the recent June 2012 seminar for the new 173 mission presidents. All 15 were there. Elder L. Tom Perry said, “This is the most remarkable era in the history of the Church. This is something that ranks with the great events that have happened in past history. Like the First Vision. Like the gift of the Book of Mormon. Like the restoration of the Gospel. Like all of the things that build that foundation for us to go forward and teach in our Father in Heaven’s Kingdom.”
(5) We need to be engaged as never before to match the enthusiasm of our missionaries and our leaders. We are called to the work to help God.
(6) Consider how you are going to help: First, pray how you’re going to help someone. Second, pray for the missionaries in your area by name. Third, invite a friend to an activity in or out of your home. Listen to the spirit direct you. He calls all this “THE HASTENING.”
(7) Now quotes Alma in BoM, “Oh that I were an angel . . . “ If you bring just one soul, how great will be your joy!
(8) Another story of a stake president with some tattered shoes on his credenza. The shoes came from a young a convert to the Church who had little and wanted to serve a mission for the Lord. Then a photo is flashed on the screen depicting the shoes. They have been “bronzed” and rest on a walnut base. He quotes Isaiah about “How beautiful upon the mountains . . feet . . . etc.”
(9) He adds his testimony to Joseph Smith that “he lives!”
CONGREGATIONAL HYMN: “Press Forward Saints”
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4th SPEAKER: Elder Arnulio Valenzuela
First Quorum of the Seventy
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(1) Recently spoke to the MTC missionaries in Mexico. I noticed how happy they were to learn their language skills. I reflected on the words of Alma when he commanded his son Helaman to keep a record and keep these things sacred so they will go forward to all nations. By small things the Lord brings about his eternal purposes.
(2) Those missionaries that are humble can invite others to come unto Christ.
(3) As members we can do small simple things to help bring others to the knowledge of their God and learn what’s needed for salvation of their souls.
(4) Tells a story of a woman, Martha, that wanted no more of the Church. Then the members sang a hymn with her. She felt the spirit so strongly, that she changed her mind and she came back to Church. The family began to 'feel' the true joy of the blessings of the Gospel.
(5) Many need our help and are waiting for their valiant brothers and sisters to rescue them. I spend countless hours visiting the less active whose hearts are being softened to return to the Church without hesitation.
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5th SPEAKER: Elder Timothy J. Dyches
Second Quorum of the Seventy
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(1) Tells New Testament stories of Jesus requiring ‘faith’ for miracles: Where he heals the man in his bed, his faith made him whole, etc.
(2) Jesus Christ heals body, mind and spirit. His healing begins with faith.
(3) Jesus invites: Come follow me, draw near unto me, seek, and ask.
(4) We are healed through the Sacrament and the atonement. Our guilt can be swept away if we have faith.
(5) Telling a World War II healing story of Cory in a Nazi camp who had thoughts of forgiveness for his oppressors, etc. and the miracle that followed.
(6) Have faith in the timing of healings from the Savior. He waits at the door and knocks. Love God. Serve your neighbor.
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6th SPEAKER: Elder Jeffrey R. Holland
Quorum of the Twelve Apostles
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(1) Topic: Mental Illness, or emotional disorders.
(2) These afflictions are the reality of mortal life just like a tumor or high blood pressure.
(3) Speaking of MDD (Major Depressive Disorder). Quotes Ammon and his brethren in BoM being depressed.
(4) MDD . . . this dark night of the mind and spirit is more than mere discouragement.
(5) It strikes anxious students, military veterans, grandmothers, and young fathers trying to provide for their families.
(6) I can feel a deep sympathy for those in these situations. Joseph Smith searched and contemplated the darkest abyss.
(7) How do you respond to those with mental challenges: never lose your faith in your Father in Heaven. God’s love is always there for you. Pursue those practices that bring blessings: Priesthood blessings, partake of the Sacrament, believe in miracles. Hope is never lost. Happier days are ahead.
(8) “When you face depletion depression, make the requisite adjustments. Fatigue is the common enemy of us all. So slow down, rest up, replenish and refill. Physicians promise us that if we do not take time to be well we will most assuredly take time later on.”
(9) Caregivers can only fix so much. Be grateful for what you can do. The Lord commands you to patiently endure some things as part of our mortal education. Don’t run faster than you have strength. Charity never faileth.
(10) There’s much to be grateful for. He tells of a close family. Stephanie who was burned in a plane crash. After five months in a coma she awoke, saw herself and wanted everyone to stay away and never look upon her. She fought her way back and now she is a popular “mommy blogger” with a divine purpose to be a mom and cherish every day.
(11) Trust in God. The dawn will break brightly. We are in the hands of the divine potter. God will make the repairs. We need to be merciful, non-judgmental and kind.
(12) Testifies of the holy resurrection, and gift of the atonement when those afflicted will be free at last. (tears are starting – now they’re flowing.)
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7th SPEAKER: Elder M. Russell Ballard
Quorum of the Twelve Apostles
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(1) We are all to be engaged in preaching and sharing the Gospel.
(2) In 1974 President Spencer W. Kimball said, “Perhaps the greatest reason for missionary work is to give the world its chance to hear and accept the Gospel. The scriptures are replete with commands and promises and calls and rewards for teaching the Gospel. I use the word command deliberately for it seems to be an insistent directive from which we singly and collectively cannot escape.”
(3) We are to lengthen our stride. Quicken our pace. Act in faith.
(4) Reflect on the teachings of the prophets from Joseph until today. They’ve consistently called on all members and leadership to be anxious engaged in bringing the Gospel to all of Heavenly Father’s children in all of the world.
(5) My message is that the Lord is hastening his work. In our day this can only be done when every member of the Church reaches out with love to share the truths of the restored Gospel of Jesus Christ. We need to work in partnership with our 80,000 missionaries. The guidelines are outlined on lds.org “Hastening the Work of Salvation.”
(6) “We know from our research, that most active members of the Church want the blessings of the Gospel to be part of the lives of others whom they love, even those whom they’ve never met. But we also know that many members hesitate to do missionary work and share the Gospel for two basic reasons.”
(7) Reason one – Fear. “Many members don’t even pray for opportunities to share the Gospel fearing that they might receive divine promptings to do something they think they are not capable of doing.”
(8) Reason two – “Misunderstanding of what missionary work is.” Make the decision to do what Jesus Christ has asked us to do.
(9) “Fear will be replaced with faith and confidence when members and the full time missionaries kneel in prayer and ask the Lord to bless them with missionary opportunities. Then we must demonstrate our faith and watch for opportunities to introduce the Gospel of Jesus Christ to our Heavenly Father’s children, and surely those opportunities will come.”
(10) These opportunities will flow as a natural result of our love for our brothers and sisters. Just be positive. Many will feel your love, even though the timing might not be right at the moment. It’s impossible for us to fail when we do our best and are on the Lord’s errand.
(11) Your voice and my voice is the voice of the Good Shepherd. Pray personally and in your family for missionary opportunities. Talk to as many people as you can each day.
(12) Full time missionaries: If you want to teach more you must talk to more people every day. This has always been what the Lord has sent missionaries forth to do.
(13) This is a privilege to be anxiously engaged in the service of the Lord. The key is that you be inspired of God and that you ask him for direction and then go and do as the spirit prompts you.
(14) “We’re not asking everyone to do everything. We’re simply asking all members to pray, knowing that if every member young and old will reach out to just one between now and Christmas, millions will feel the love of the Lord Jesus Christ. And what a wonderful gift to the Savior.”
(TSCC must really be bleeding and hemorrhaging in huge proportions.)
(15) Quotes Moroni 7: have faith in me, by faith miracles are wrought and angels appear and minister unto men.
(16) Testifies the Lord will hear your prayers.
HE DID NOT SAY THE CHURCH IS TRUE OR THAT JOSEPH SMITH WAS A TRUE PROPHET or testify as a special witness of Christ.
CLOSING CHOIR NUMBER: “Love At Home”
CLOSING PRAYER: Carol F. McConkie, First Counselor in the Young Women General Presidency
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WRITER'S CONCLUDING TESTIMONY
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(TSCC teaches we’re to share our testimony as often as possible . . . right?) Well then. . .
. . . (1) I know Joseph Smith’s translation and revelation of modern-day scripture, by means of his occultist trademark (his ‘peep-stone-in-a-hat’ ruse), annihilates the LDS claim that Smith’s restored divine eternal truths can be corroborated by supernal faith methodologies.
. . . (2) I know with absolute certainty that listening to this broadcast has been as nourishing as a hot fudge sundae smothered in whipped cream and a heaping stomach-churning swig of chocolate-flavored ipecac syrup! And I leave this testimony with you in the name of the internet lord almighty, even MormonThink.com, Amen.
Jiminycricket
Edited 5 time(s). Last edit at 10/06/2013 11:58AM by jiminycricket.