A relative has confided in me that he/she wants to leave the church, no longer believes. This individual is currently at Southern Virginia University, which has an honor code similar to BYU's. He/she has found a great group of friends there who are not TBM, loves the school and the area, doesn't want to leave.

What advice would you give someone who wants to fly under the radar, still attend a church school, but also no longer believes in the church? Has anyone here done it- how did you do it?

Thanks!

Be very selective of who you confide in, what you do, and who you do it with. Make sure that you play the game, no matter how painful, to make sure you don't get kicked out. And lie, a lot. Bishops have no magic powers, so they can't tell when you are lying to them. Getting that degree is priority number 1.

Just follow the rules. If you break them, make sure you can't get caught or ratted out. If this can't be done then you just have to transfer to somewhere else. It wasn't too hard to keep the rules for me at the school I went to but the religious overtone was so pervasive and led to a lot of mind-stopping, non-academic ridiculousness. Too much of it just about drove me crazy and I'm done with it, I left.

As at BYU campuses, I would wager that spies and simple ratfinks and tattlers are everywhere. It is nothing for a Mormon to run to his bishop and tattle like a little kid. So being selective is paramount. Considering how much college--particularly SVU--one has to be careful to play by the rules and then leave when one can, then have the records transferred to another school. BYU gets away with all kinds of shenanigans regarding handing out diplomas and transferring credits when it comes to an apostate. Pettiness is the only real tool the Mormons have left.

Tough to do and not run afoul of the honor council Nazis...probably even harder now than 45 years ago too.

Ron Burr

Just do a lot of lying. If you can't stomach a lot of lying then you better look for another university, because they don't want the real you at their school.

LDS, Inc. is brutal to apostates, athiests, agnostics, liberals, questioners.

LDS, Inc. is pretty kind to Jack Mormons -- people that believe, but are "weak" and might "slip up" once in a while. They try, but can't perform.

If you want to fly under the radar, be in group 2.

Don't fake being Peter Priesthood. Fake being Jack.

RG