My roommate's parents are visiting and I overheard them praising her espresso machine, and later, all planning to go to a local bar together along with my roommate's boyfriend. These small, insignificant events are things I could never imagine happening with my parents in a million years. I'm a full grown adult who has to hide my vodka wrapped in clothes under the bed when my mom visits and who wouldn't dare dream of drinking a glass of coke in front of my dad and whose parents probably still think I've never even talked to a boy. They don't know me at all and I don't know them, either. I know it's no use sitting around full of regrets but sometimes I think about what it would be like not to have been raised in a church that by requiring perfection, also promotes dishonesty, and that requires so much time and money that none is left for the family. Sorry, these are just some thoughts that have been on my mind recently...

I feel your pain. I can't do any of that stuff in front of my parents either...well I can, but they would shun, shame and remove me from their life completely

So sorry to hear your story. I sense you know this but you aren't likely to ever enjoy a truly interesting, non-judgmental moment like your friend's.

Same way I'll never be able to sit and have a nice dinner and glass of wine with my ultra TBM parents. Or ever have a meaningful conversation that doesn't revolve around "the church".

Never say never people. I was nudged out of TSCC by my daughter when I was 65 and I then told my mother who was 85 and she left too.

I love your story, releve, because it gives me hope for my mom. When I said f-you to TSCC in my late teens, she told me how sad she'd be when I couldn't be with my family in eternity due to my poor choices. Fast forward 15 years and the same woman gives me a bottle of champagne and is openly pro-choice, pro-marriage equality, and a Rachel Maddow fan. Huh?! Maybe another decade, and she'll be free...

Wow! Go Mom!

and I'm 53 and been out of the church since I was 20!

Sometimes you just have to accept relationships as they are. I finally had to do that with my mom after years of arguing over issues that I pushed, thinking it would ultimately improve our relationship. Ha! Not. It's gotten better since I started refusing to go there and we stopped arguing, but I'll never have the friendly, adult, sharing relationship with my mom that I wanted.

I mentioned that I wanted a glass of wine on my birthday, and she said, "Do you like wine?" and that felt like a major achievement. :)



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 09/14/2013 07:56AM by munchybotaz.